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Friday 28 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I got fired from my job because I "look too grumpy." FML

#20437963
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28102) - you deserved it (9253)

On 01/02/2013 at 2:28am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I jokingly asked my boyfriend if he was cheating on me. He replied, "Nah, all the chicks in this town are fuck-ugly." and stared at me until I left the room. Good to know that's his only reason for staying faithful. FML

#20430536
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28033) - you deserved it (7035)

On 12/29/2012 at 6:54pm - love - by single once again (woman) - United Kingdom (Havering)

Today, after I finally laid down from a long day and was about to fall asleep, I realized I forgot to set my alarm. I don't own an alarm clock and my alarm is on my phone. Which was in my car. I live on 15th floor of an apartment building and our parking garage is across the street. FML

#20439908
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27989) - you deserved it (8323)

On 01/03/2013 at 12:02am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I opened my Christmas present from my parents. I got a road-side assistance package. I don't own a vehicle, and I don't even have a driver's license. FML

#20420365
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27618) - you deserved it (3053)

On 12/25/2012 at 1:41am - misc - by CambodianAsshole (man) - United States (California)

Today, I decided to cover a coworker's closing shift because she felt sick. My boss even gave me a $10 gift card for doing it. I felt good about it, until I walked outside and found that my car had been stolen. FML

#20425281
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27348) - you deserved it (1347)

On 12/27/2012 at 3:52am - work - by Ross R - United States (Washington)

Today, my cat had the greatest idea ever: hide inside our Christmas tree and attack anyone who walks past. It would have come as extremely funny to me if I hadn't been her first victim. FML

#20425350
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27338) - you deserved it (7287)

On 12/27/2012 at 5:16am - animals - by DarkDisaster (woman) - United States

Today, I had to watch my drunk girlfriend yell at a cat for not having periods. The worst part is that she was at a pet store. The pet store at which I work. FML

#20431107
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27267) - you deserved it (3163)

On 12/30/2012 at 12:20am - misc - by Wtf is wrong with her (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my dad asked me when I was going to start looking for a job. Jokingly, I told him next year. He got pissed, started to yell, then realized Tuesday is New Year's Day and grounded me for "being a dumbass." FML

#20432925
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26948) - you deserved it (8200)

On 12/30/2012 at 10:51pm - work - by BAMN2187 - United States

Today, my workplace was having a raffle and was giving away a Venus shaving kit. A co-worker won, but instead of keeping it, she walked over and handed the basket to me in front of everyone, said "You need it more" and walked away. FML

#20433619
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26566) - you deserved it (5494)

On 12/31/2012 at 5:17am - work - by shaving kit (woman) -

Today, proving that there's no limit to the stupid shit people will do, my husband called me from hospital, needing a lift home. He tried planking on top of his car while his buddies sped it down a hill, and I now have to take care of him while his broken leg heals. FML

#20428520
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26178) - you deserved it (3396)

On 12/28/2012 at 7:50pm - misc - by say dump him and i'll kill you (woman) - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)

Today, I went to take a shower. Afterwards, I noticed I'd forgotten to bring a shirt to change into, so I put on a towel and went back to my room, only to witness my 14-year-old brother and a friend smelling my bra, commenting on "how warm it is". FML

Today, while helping out at a retirement home, I had to get a book off a bookshelf. When I reached up, my watch got stuck on my shirt, resulting in my shirt lifting up. I just flashed my man-boobs to at least 20 senior citizens, and one of them even asked if he could have a feel. FML

#20433442
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25976) - you deserved it (5823)

On 12/31/2012 at 2:58am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was walking in the park, when a kid ran up and hit me in the stomach. He said, "Don't get mad, get glad!" and ran off. FML



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