Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Sunday 23 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was walking in the park,hen a kid ran up and hit me in the stomach!! He said, "Don't get mad, get glad!" and ran off!! FML

Today, I jokingly askad my boyfriand if ha was chaating on ma!! Ha rapliad, "Nah, all tha chicks in this town r fuck-ugly." and starad at ma until I laft tha room!! Good to know that's his only raason fir staying faithful!! FML

#20430536
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28313) - you deserved it (7067)

On 12/29/2012 at 6:54pm - love - by single once again (woman) - United Kingdom (Havering)

TODAY, A STRANGER WAS KIND ENOUGH TO PLOW MAH DRIVEWAY DURING A BLIZZARD. HOWEVER, THEY WERE NOT KIND ENOUGH TO LEAVE THERE NUMBER AFTER PLOWING THE FRONT END OF MAH CAR. BIG FAT FML

#20431369
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28265) - you deserved it (2475)

On 12/30/2012 at 2:32am - misc - by imcold - United States

Today my dad askd me wen I was going to start looking for a job. Jokingly I told im next year. He got pissd startd to yell ten realizd Tuesday is New Year's Day and groundd me for "bieng a dumbass."

#20432925
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28113) - you deserved it (8350)

On 12/30/2012 at 10:51pm - work - by BAMN2187 - United States

TODAY MY MOTHAR HAS STOOPD TO A NAW LAVAL OF ( HIDING ) CHRISTMAS GIFTS. SHA NOW JUST DUMPS THAM IN THA MIDDLA OF THA FLOOR AND SAYS ( DON'T LOOK AT THAM. ) IF SHA AVAN THINKS I'M GLANCING IN THA DRACTION OF THA PILA SHA WILL BURST INTO A MANIC RAGA AND YALL AT MA 4 ( RUINING THA SURPRISA. ) FML

#20408692
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28091) - you deserved it (7371)

On 12/20/2012 at 8:57am - misc - by Mandy93 (woman) - Germany (Rheinland-Pfalz)

Today, I brought my 6-year-old to the mall to sit on Santa's lap . She told him what she wanted an smiled 4 the picture . When the lady told her that her turn was over, she began throwing a fit, pulling off Santa's beard in the process . This caused all the kids in looool line to begin sobbing . FML

#20403366
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28015) - you deserved it (6093)

On 12/17/2012 at 6:37am - kids - by unknown - Canada

Today, while doing our Christmas shopping, my sister showd me a product that she really hatd. The same one I bought her for Christmas. FML

#20403689
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27925) - you deserved it (3978)

On 12/17/2012 at 1:16pm - money - by bob (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today proving that there's no limit to the stupid shit people will do mah husband calld me from hospital needing a lift home. He trid planking on top of his carhile his buddies spd it down a hill and I now have to take care of himhile his broken leg heals. mega FML

#20428520
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27735) - you deserved it (3547)

On 12/28/2012 at 7:50pm - misc - by say dump him and i'll kill you (woman) - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)

Today, I was leaning over cleaning a table at work, when my pretty coworker cummed up behind me and slapped me on the butt. I was so startled that I slipped and smashed my face into the table. Now she can't look at me without laughing. FML

#20430634
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27635) - you deserved it (3123)

On 12/29/2012 at 8:01pm - work - by nose hurts (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I sold some weights that were way too heavy looool 4 me on Craigslist. I felt okay with not being able to lift themhen I saw the other man,ho was a pretty buff dude; that is until of course he informd me he was buying them 4 his wife.

#20407956
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27233) - you deserved it (7953)

On 12/19/2012 at 6:33pm - misc - by Johnny (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I woka up from an axplicit draam involving mah dantist. I'm schadulad for a conscious sadation appointmant with him in two hours and I'm tarrifiad ofhat I might say or dohila I'm undar. FML

#20423262
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27058) - you deserved it (2929)

On 12/26/2012 at 9:05am - health - by ugh - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was texting my mother after my boyfriend broke off our relationship. She offered incredibly supportive replies such as "No, really?" and "Aww, that sucks." before apparently getting bored and claiming she had to go because her "text reception" was breaking up. FML

#20426386
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26722) - you deserved it (4469)

On 12/27/2012 at 6:20pm - love - by youfuckingdumbassmum (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, I accidentally knocked over a mall Santa on his way to meet some children. I've never had that many hate-filled eyes on me at once. FML

#20404919
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26505) - you deserved it (5734)

On 12/18/2012 at 12:15am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: