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Friday 7 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my daugter finally gave brt to twin boys. Se informed me tat se named tem Peregrin Took and Meriadoc Brandybuck. My grandsons are named after Hobbits. FML

#20194616
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28404) - you deserved it (5385)

On 12/06/2012 at 11:49pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

in history class, we were talking about Ancient Rome, and what childbrth would have been like back then. One grl askd in all seriousnes why they didn't use ultrasound machine to see what sex their babie were. I have to deal with people like this on a daily basis. FML

#20398310
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28142) - you deserved it (1824)

On 12/13/2012 at 6:44pm - misc - by surrounded by dumbfucks (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today , Mah Drunk Grlfriend Maxd Out Mah Credit Card , On An "authentic" Jesus Christ Autograph On EBay. FML

#20397287
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27948) - you deserved it (4724)

On 12/12/2012 at 9:14pm - misc - by maxedoutidiot - United States

Today , I played a game of Monopoly wit ma friends!! Since I'm of Greek origin , tey tougt it would be funny to make me start wit a €100,000 debt!! FML

#20398504
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27866) - you deserved it (5080) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/13/2012 at 9:25pm - money - by Money-money-money (woman) - France

Today, I finally got ma wedding potos in te mail. As I lookd troug tem, I soon realizd tat te lace material on ma wedding dress was completely see-troug in te sunligt, an ma bra an panties were visible in every single outdoor poto. I ad an outdoor wedding. FML

#20397769
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27779) - you deserved it (8004)

On 12/13/2012 at 9:35am - misc - by AboutToGoKillBillOnSomeone (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, mah very cheap boyfriend of four yeres proposed. I was overwhelmed with emotion, since he bought such a huge, seemingly-diamond ring. I was later looool overwhelmed with emotion when mah finger turned green.

#20201870
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27743) - you deserved it (3931)

On 12/12/2012 at 12:51pm - love - by dino0123 - United States (Virginia)

Today, I cummed home to find looool a mouse in the garage!! Frantic, I killed it!! My 7-year-old son cummed home from soccer, and started crying because he couldn't find the class pet, Mr!! Whiskers!! I killed my son's class pet!! FML

#20194994
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27679) - you deserved it (16169)

On 12/07/2012 at 10:30am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my family went on a family trip without me . Their reason fir not bringing me? My older sister wanted extra legroom during the drive . FML

wen ma boyfriend and I were getting intimate , I got a nose bled. He gave me a srt to plug it wit and kept going. FML

#20195821
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27105) - you deserved it (4977)

On 12/08/2012 at 12:33am - intimacy - by anon - United States

today mah son got suspendd from school . He's in kindergarten . fat FML

#20201910
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27092) - you deserved it (6715)

On 12/12/2012 at 1:32pm - kids - by Renzy (woman) -

Today, I woke up to find my best friend lying down and unresponsive. Frigtend, I tappd on te glass. He got scard and startd swimming again. My best friend is a fis.

#20199342
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26934) - you deserved it (6308)

On 12/10/2012 at 5:40pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Vastmanlands Lan)

Taday I thought I felt something itch mah butt as I sat down on the toilet. Sure it was just mah imagination, I did mah business. When I was done I saw there were 4 cockroaches crawling under the seat. FML

#20194684
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26915) - you deserved it (4189)

On 12/07/2012 at 12:46am - misc - by lingadoo - Kuwait (Al Kuwayt)

Today, I Was Getting Intimate With My Current Bootycall When He Thought It Would Be Funny To Make Animal Sounds . He "baa-ed" "moo-ed" And "gobbled" Until Losing His Erection From Intense Laughter, Leaving Me There Very Confused And Unsatisfied . FML

#20198007
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26253) - you deserved it (9235)

On 12/09/2012 at 5:46pm - intimacy - by Bug5992 (woman) - United States (Ohio)



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