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Friday 7 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was bartending. A guest was getting belligerent so I had to cut him off. He called me a bitch and threw the rest of his drink in my face before storming off. The belligerent asscandle was my boyfriend. FML

#20193528
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24207) - you deserved it (4118)

On 12/06/2012 at 6:50am - love - by FMyEx - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my daughter called me to pick her up at the mall. She said I had to meet her inside a specific store, so I figured she wanted me to pay for something. Turns out I was right, she was being arrested for shoplifting. FML

#20193017
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24168) - you deserved it (2397)

On 12/05/2012 at 9:32pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my dad got a warning from our ISP for going well over their fair usage limit. I barely use our wifi, and I keep telling him he should password-protect our router to stop people leeching our Internet. He's blaming me anyway, and says I'm grounded until January. FML

#20195319
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24071) - you deserved it (1719)

On 12/07/2012 at 4:49pm - misc - by WPA2 OR DEATH (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while picking up a birthday cake, I was screamed at by an upset woman for getting special attention from the bakers, and that I was nothing more than an attention-hogging slut. The bakers are my co-workers and I was picking my cake up on my day off. FML

#20201761
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23969) - you deserved it (1594)

On 12/12/2012 at 10:05am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I went on a date with a great girl; we went out to dinner and saw a movie. After the movie, we went out to my car to find out that a homeless man had broken the window, climbed into it, and was eating the leftover pasta with his fingers. FML

#20198660
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23944) - you deserved it (1548)

On 12/10/2012 at 2:01am - misc - by Alec (man) - United States

Today, I was yelled at by a customer, who was upset over having waited twenty minutes for a waiter to come take her order. Maybe it would be understandable, if she was sitting in an actual restaurant, and not a serve-yourself coffee house. FML

#20194179
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23844) - you deserved it (1400)

On 12/06/2012 at 6:50pm - work - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I sent in an assignment from my batshit insane teacher. The assignment was to read a poem, analyze it, and make a comic of its plot. This would've been fine if the teacher who assigned it to me didn't teach math. FML

Today, my dog did something I had no idea he could do. He participated in an all-male three-way at the dog park. In front of everyone. FML

#20199452
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23456) - you deserved it (2397)

On 12/10/2012 at 7:04pm - animals - by MoreActionThanMe - United States

Today, after coming home from surgery, I discovered that the heating in my entire building had failed. I called my mom asking if I could come and stay with her for a few days. She told me to "think warm thoughts." FML

#20192758
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23450) - you deserved it (1523)

On 12/05/2012 at 6:27pm - money - by lonelyandcold (man) - United Kingdom (Solihull)

Today, my science class found out that I have OCD and that one of my rituals is to cough when others cough. This is going to be a long year. FML

#20191703
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23429) - you deserved it (3653)

On 12/04/2012 at 11:09pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I gave a homeless man my last bit of spare change so he could get on the bus. Just as I was about to get on too, I realized I'd lost my bus card. I had to get off the bus and watch as the man waved at me through the window. FML

#20192452
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23383) - you deserved it (2751)

On 12/05/2012 at 3:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I ran into my high school crush at Target. When I asked her if she remembered me, she patted me on the head, said, "Unfortunately," and walked away. FML

#20191408
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23338) - you deserved it (2476)

On 12/04/2012 at 8:06pm - misc - by Likian5 (man) - United States

Today, I have a cold. I can't begin to count how many times I've sneezed throughout the day, but I can count how many times I've sneezed so hard that I've peed myself: twice. Once while I was at work helping a customer, the other while sitting on the couch next to my boyfriend. FML

#20397583
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23283) - you deserved it (2221)

On 12/13/2012 at 3:58am - health - by meranda_johnson - United States



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