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Tuesday 4 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was doing a presentation in front of my boss. On the last slide, someone had put a picture of a man's cock. I later found out it was my boss who did it. It was his "good reason" to fire me. FML

#20199630
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23122) - you deserved it (1232)

On 12/10/2012 at 9:05pm - work - by golfstar11 - United States (Georgia)

Today, my best friend announced she was getting married. I've always wanted to be a bridesmaid but she then added, "You can't be in the bridal party because you don't have the same body type as the other bridesmaids. But you can still come to the bachelorette party!" FML

#20194701
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23045) - you deserved it (1661)

On 12/07/2012 at 1:01am - misc - by SBCR (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I dutifully attended my husband's local gig at a coffee shop. I thus found out, through song, about my husband's affair, in front of about 100 people. All of whom we both know. FML

#20191850
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22885) - you deserved it (1324)

On 12/05/2012 at 12:35am - love - by musiciansareoneofakind (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, on the bus, when I was asking my 6-year-old son what he wanted for Christmas, a stranger came up to us and yelled at him about how Santa Claus is not real, that his "parents are fucking liars" and that he should "never listen to anything one of those fuckers says." FML

#20200046
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22730) - you deserved it (1914)

On 12/11/2012 at 2:15am - kids - by n1a1t1h1a1n1 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was riding the train and someone farted. Everyone looked at me. People always blame farts on the fat guy. FML

#20190789
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21978) - you deserved it (4359)

On 12/04/2012 at 11:04am - misc - by Banana (man) - Puerto Rico

Today, I came home to find all of the wood in my house either broken or gone. On the now legless table there was a note from my mother, saying that she needed the wood to build a boat, and that I will thank her when the world ends. FML

#20197527
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21939) - you deserved it (1224)

On 12/09/2012 at 10:29am - misc - by woodless (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend sent me so many nice texts that he made me fall in love with him that little bit more. It turns out he was sweetening me up before telling me he cheated on me the night before. FML

#20192047
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21759) - you deserved it (1462)

On 12/05/2012 at 6:29am - love - by brokenhearted (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I overheard my parents fighting about who has been the most loyal. I found out my Dad has cheated twice, and is still the most faithful of the two. FML

#20198811
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21607) - you deserved it (1026)

On 12/10/2012 at 6:41am - love - by slenderman908 - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was snooping around in my parents' closet to see what I would get for Christmas, when I came across a UPS package. It was the video game I ordered off eBay 3 weeks ago, addressed to me. They told me it had never arrived and said I should ask Santa to bring it to me. FML

#20195835
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21590) - you deserved it (2991)

On 12/08/2012 at 12:44am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I came home to find a mouse in the garage. Frantic, I killed it. My 7-year-old son came home from soccer, and started crying because he couldn't find the class pet, Mr. Whiskers. I killed my son's class pet. FML

#20194994
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21398) - you deserved it (13485)

On 12/07/2012 at 10:30am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, the guy I'm dating found out I have severe arachnophobia. He downloaded a picture of a huge, hairy spider and set it as background on my iPhone. I can't even unlock my phone, as every time I try, the spider pops up and I drop the phone. He laughs every time I do it. FML

#20200411
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21205) - you deserved it (3974)

On 12/11/2012 at 1:09pm - love - by skinnybitch (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I was at the breakfast table when my sister started eating a banana. Before I knew what was happening, I'd somehow popped a boner. I had to wait for her to leave before I could stand up. FML

#20195358
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21129) - you deserved it (14565)

On 12/07/2012 at 5:40pm - intimacy - by bill219 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I thought I felt something itch my butt as I sat down on the toilet. Sure it was just my imagination, I did my business. When I was done I saw there were 4 cockroaches crawling under the seat. FML

#20194684
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20751) - you deserved it (2813)

On 12/07/2012 at 12:46am - misc - by lingadoo - Kuwait (Al Kuwayt)



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