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Sunday 2 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my daughter finally gave birth to twin boys. She informed me that she named them Peregrin Took and Meriadoc Brandybuck. My grandsons are named after Hobbits. FML

#20194616
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28159) - you deserved it (5361)

On 12/06/2012 at 11:49pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was snooping around in my parents' closet to see what I would get for Christmas, when I came across a UPS package. It was the video game I ordered off eBay 3 weeks ago, addressed to me. They told me it had never arrived and said I should ask Santa to bring it to me. FML

#20195835
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27566) - you deserved it (4289)

On 12/08/2012 at 12:44am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I came home to find a mouse in the garage. Frantic, I killed it. My 7-year-old son came home from soccer, and started crying because he couldn't find the class pet, Mr. Whiskers. I killed my son's class pet. FML

#20194994
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27493) - you deserved it (16106)

On 12/07/2012 at 10:30am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm breaking up with her because she's very abusive. After a couple of seconds of awkward silence, she kicked me in the nuts and ran away. FML

#20189170
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27311) - you deserved it (3682)

On 12/03/2012 at 6:53am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, I came home to find all of the wood in my house either broken or gone. On the now legless table there was a note from my mother, saying that she needed the wood to build a boat, and that I will thank her when the world ends. FML

#20197527
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27159) - you deserved it (1565)

On 12/09/2012 at 10:29am - misc - by woodless (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, when my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I got a nose bleed. He gave me a shirt to plug it with and kept going. FML

#20195821
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26988) - you deserved it (4750)

On 12/08/2012 at 12:33am - intimacy - by anon - United States

Today, I realized that the comforting, unique scent of my mother in my childhood was actually the smell of the marijuana she smokes. FML

#20184714
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26842) - you deserved it (2922)

On 11/29/2012 at 10:35pm - misc - by childhoodupinsmoke (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I thought I felt something itch my butt as I sat down on the toilet. Sure it was just my imagination, I did my business. When I was done I saw there were 4 cockroaches crawling under the seat. FML

#20194684
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26732) - you deserved it (4172)

On 12/07/2012 at 12:46am - misc - by lingadoo - Kuwait (Al Kuwayt)

Today, I realized the dress I bought yesterday still had the security tag on. I returned to the store to get it removed, only to realize my receipt was misplaced. The lady at the counter thought I stole it, called security, and had me escorted out, dress-less. FML

#20196308
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26685) - you deserved it (3866)

On 12/08/2012 at 12:12pm - money - by bitchsawmebuyit - United States (New York)

Today, it's my birthday and my ex husband texted me at midnight to tell happy birthday. Too bad he couldn't have texted my new husband to remind him. FML

#20196242
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26608) - you deserved it (4760)

On 12/08/2012 at 11:12am - love - by aerythia - United States (Tennessee)

Today my boyfriend and my best friend had a very lengthy, detailed conversation about Lord of the Rings and the Hobbit, of which I know nothing about. Once they stopped, I looked at him and smiled, and he responded with, "Why can't you be more like her?" FML

#20183421
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26600) - you deserved it (7953)

On 11/28/2012 at 11:33pm - love - by JStein (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my friend spilt orange juice all over my iPad. She then went ahead to clean it off by rinsing it with water. FML

#20187648
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26408) - you deserved it (2583)

On 12/02/2012 at 5:16am - misc - by Ashley - United States (California)

Today, I was getting intimate with my current bootycall when he thought it would be funny to make animal sounds. He "baa-ed" "moo-ed" and "gobbled" until losing his erection from intense laughter, leaving me there very confused and unsatisfied. FML

#20198007
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26115) - you deserved it (9208)

On 12/09/2012 at 5:46pm - intimacy - by Bug5992 (woman) - United States (Ohio)



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