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Friday 30 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I came home to find a mouse in the garage. Frantic, I killed it. My 7-year-old son came home from soccer, and started crying because he couldn't find the class pet, Mr. Whiskers. I killed my son's class pet. FML

#20194994
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29952) - you deserved it (17153)

On 12/07/2012 at 10:30am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I thought I felt something itch my butt as I sat down on the toilet. Sure it was just my imagination, I did my business. When I was done I saw there were 4 cockroaches crawling under the seat. FML

#20194684
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29554) - you deserved it (4549)

On 12/07/2012 at 12:46am - misc - by lingadoo - Kuwait (Al Kuwayt)

Today my boyfriend and my best friend had a very lengthy, detailed conversation about Lord of the Rings and the Hobbit, of which I know nothing about. Once they stopped, I looked at him and smiled, and he responded with, "Why can't you be more like her?" FML

#20183421
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29436) - you deserved it (8448)

On 11/28/2012 at 11:33pm - love - by JStein (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend accused me of cheating, because I tipped our waitress at dinner. FML

#20186136
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28890) - you deserved it (2518)

On 12/01/2012 at 12:59am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, I dutifully attended my husband's local gig at a coffee shop. I thus found out, through song, about my husband's affair, in front of about 100 people. All of whom we both know. FML

Today, my husband discovered poking me in my belly button makes me have to pee, sometimes it's uncontrollable and happens immediately. He thinks it's hilarious and decided it's his new favorite game. FML

#20186585
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28721) - you deserved it (2859)

On 12/01/2012 at 12:01pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my parents heard from my sister that I'd recently lost my virginity to my girlfriend. I've never been bitched out so viciously in my life, and yet my sister, whom everyone knows has had numerous casual sexual partners this year, is treated like a princess 24/7. FML

#20188038
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27856) - you deserved it (2263)

On 12/02/2012 at 1:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Suffolk)

Today, while I was removing my makeup with my boyfriend watching, he mentioned that he used to think girls were prettier without makeup on, but he'd now changed his mind. FML

#20187008
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27754) - you deserved it (3059)

On 12/01/2012 at 6:54pm - love - by allbrokeup (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, my wife wants to name our first child Siri, after the iPhone function. FML

#20182157
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27749) - you deserved it (2635)

On 11/28/2012 at 1:06am - misc - by boo8713 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I came home to my mother-in-law wearing the gold chain which I usually keep in a hidden drawer. I searched my drawer only to find out my chain was missing. I asked my mother-in-law if she took it and she keeps denying the fact that she stole it from me. My husband is on her side. FML

#20183636
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27691) - you deserved it (1656)

On 11/29/2012 at 3:01am - misc - by elizabeth - United States (Nevada)

Today, I have three cracked ribs. I have also, for the first time in my life, developed a case of the hiccups that simply will NOT go away. It's been hours. FML

#20184990
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27517) - you deserved it (1596)

On 11/30/2012 at 2:30am - health - by Atletic - United States (New York)

Today, I've now worked on Thanksgiving, Black Friday, the weekend after that, and two days this week. My husband and son have had all that time off, and yet I've still ended up having to clean the dishes and the house after them on all of these days. FML

#20181186
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27454) - you deserved it (5272)

On 11/27/2012 at 1:05pm - work - by bored - United States

Today, I found out that my wife, who is supposed to be a recovering alcoholic, drank an entire bottle of wine and then tried to hide it at the bottom of a garbage bin. To make matters worse, when I confronted her about it, she tried to convince me that our 5-year-old daughter had drunk it. FML

#20194263
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27401) - you deserved it (1910)

On 12/06/2012 at 8:07pm - misc - by Matt8 (man) - United States



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