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Friday 30 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my cat peed on my bra. I didn't realize this until after I arrived at work for my 12-hour shift. Now I'm trying to wash my bra out in the sink and stuff paper towels down it to soak up the moisture. Only 10 more hours to go, and the smell of cat pee is still lingering. FML

#20185014
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19524) - you deserved it (3910)

On 11/30/2012 at 3:33am - work - by onlyslightly (woman) - United States

Today, I ran across the street due to a line of cars waiting for me to cross. Just as I reached the other side, my iPhone slipped out of my hand and fell into the road, just in time to get run over by multiple cars, one after the other. FML

#20181219
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19453) - you deserved it (6412)

On 11/27/2012 at 1:45pm - misc - by unknown - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, in my AP Biology class, a student informed us she'd read that Antarctica had completely melted due to global warming, to which my friend gushed, "Yeah! It's been melted for, like, months." FML

#20193921
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19358) - you deserved it (1672)

On 12/06/2012 at 3:47pm - misc - by bieberslayer (woman) - United States

Today, after telling my young kids all about Santa, his reindeer and his sleigh, we saw him. Smoking a cigarette in the beat-up car next to ours at a red light. FML

#20192265
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19210) - you deserved it (3699)

On 12/05/2012 at 11:50am - kids - by JessThompson - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my elbow was having cramps and movement issues as a result of an old set of surgical pins and wires that are being rejected by my body. One painful twitch caused my arm to lock out straight, unintentionally slapping my hand into my co-worker's crotch. Our waiting customers giggled. FML

Today, I found out what the two girls I sit near to fight about every day: seating. The loser has to sit next to me. FML

#20189404
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19017) - you deserved it (1685)

On 12/03/2012 at 12:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, it's my 21st birthday and my dad has decided to take away my ID in fear that if I have even one drink to celebrate I'll become a raging alcoholic. FML

#20189765
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18956) - you deserved it (2044)

On 12/03/2012 at 6:01pm - misc - by VedaLynn - United States

Today, I was woken up by my elderly neighbor banging on my door at 2am. She needed "urgent" assistance as she had forgotten how to turn her TV off. I'd just fallen asleep. FML

#20184989
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18749) - you deserved it (1432)

On 11/30/2012 at 2:29am - misc - by Rachael (woman) - Australia

Today, I went to Hollister with my grandmother. She immediately started yelling about the music being too loud, and ordered the staff to "shut the damn thing off". She was yelling at a bunch of mannequins. FML

#20186953
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18534) - you deserved it (3603)

On 12/01/2012 at 5:53pm - misc - by time to put you down, gran (woman) - United States

Today, the battery cables on my car came loose, thus resetting my car's electronics to factory settings. The anti-theft system is now turned on, and I can't start my car with it on. Luckily, it turns off with a remote. The remote broke about six months ago. FML

Today, while visiting my widowed great aunt, she took out her wedding rings and talked about the love she and my uncle had. Smiling, I told her that one day I hope to have as happy a marriage as theirs. Her response? "Knowing you, I wouldn't count on it." My mother sat there agreeing. FML

#20189035
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18466) - you deserved it (1983)

On 12/03/2012 at 2:17am - misc - by Stupendous_ - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my girlfriend showed me a print of a Banksy that she'd just bought, telling me it was an original. When I tried to argue that it wasn't, she broke up with me for "implying she was a moron." FML

#20190801
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18407) - you deserved it (2447)

On 12/04/2012 at 11:17am - love - by Single (man) - United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset)

Today, I got a call from my boyfriend saying I needed to come home immediately. When I got there, he informed me that the reason I needed to rush home from work was because he wiped a booger on the wall and it was in the shape of a penis. He said it's a sign, like when people see Jesus in toast. FML

#20189885
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18317) - you deserved it (2623)

On 12/03/2012 at 7:38pm - misc - by FlyingFist - United States



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