Tuesday 27 November 2012 
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Today, I was enjoying a nice bath, when one of my cats jumped up on the rim and started purring. I thought it was sweet, until my other cat ran in and body-slammed the first into the tub with me. Being a conscientious cat owner, I hadn't de-clawed them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16164) - you deserved it (4988)
On 11/27/2012 at 2:52pm - animals - by Neutered (man) - United States (Alaska)
Today, my girlfriend got into the Christmas cheer while giving me a hand job, smashing my nuts with her palm in time to her humming of Jingle Bells. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16091) - you deserved it (2442)
On 12/02/2012 at 6:39pm - intimacy - by fineididntwantkidsanyway (man) - Australia (South Australia)
Today, my cat peed on my bra. I didn't realize this until after I arrived at work for my 12-hour shift. Now I'm trying to wash my bra out in the sink and stuff paper towels down it to soak up the moisture. Only 10 more hours to go, and the smell of cat pee is still lingering. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15605) - you deserved it (2840)
On 11/30/2012 at 3:33am - work - by onlyslightly (woman) - United States
Today, I finally summoned the courage to ask my dad to pay me as he promised, after I cut the lawn and cleaned all the house windows last week. His response was, "Get fucked." FML
I agree, your life sucks (15468) - you deserved it (1841)
On 12/02/2012 at 8:57pm - misc - by :/ (woman) - United States (California)
Today, it's my 21st birthday and my dad has decided to take away my ID in fear that if I have even one drink to celebrate I'll become a raging alcoholic. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15199) - you deserved it (1488)
On 12/03/2012 at 6:01pm - misc - by VedaLynn - United States
Today, I found out what the two girls I sit near to fight about every day: seating. The loser has to sit next to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15166) - you deserved it (1190)
On 12/03/2012 at 12:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)
Today, my mom found her CD of cats and dogs singing Christmas songs. That is what I'll be listening to until Christmas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15153) - you deserved it (1077)
On 12/01/2012 at 5:00am - misc - by hinowdie - United States
Today, I got a call from my boyfriend saying I needed to come home immediately. When I got there, he informed me that the reason I needed to rush home from work was because he wiped a booger on the wall and it was in the shape of a penis. He said it's a sign, like when people see Jesus in toast. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15127) - you deserved it (2022)
On 12/03/2012 at 7:38pm - misc - by FlyingFist - United States
Today, my 5 kids were singing their favorite Christmas carols in the van, each trying to sing louder than the others. It would have probably sounded better if they were all singing the same song. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15120) - you deserved it (2856)
On 11/29/2012 at 9:22am - kids - by Dave (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I ran across the street due to a line of cars waiting for me to cross. Just as I reached the other side, my iPhone slipped out of my hand and fell into the road, just in time to get run over by multiple cars, one after the other. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15100) - you deserved it (4749)
On 11/27/2012 at 1:45pm - misc - by unknown - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, I got into a fight with my girlfriend. After yelling and arguing my point, my cat got up and jumped up next to her on the bed. He sat down, and they both glared at me until I left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14994) - you deserved it (452)
On 12/03/2012 at 2:02pm - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my elbow was having cramps and movement issues as a result of an old set of surgical pins and wires that are being rejected by my body. One painful twitch caused my arm to lock out straight, unintentionally slapping my hand into my co-worker's crotch. Our waiting customers giggled. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14880) - you deserved it (935)
On 12/04/2012 at 2:10am - health - by SApprentice (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I caught the train into the city. Halfway there some kids hopped on smelling of marijuana and alcohol. Their topic of discussion? How much pubic hair they had. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14861) - you deserved it (2049)
On 11/29/2012 at 12:40am - kids - by fabs1171 - Australia (New South Wales)
Friday 24 May 2013
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