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Monday 26 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, it's my 21st birthday and my dad has decided to take away my ID in fear that if I have even one drink to celebrate I'll become a raging alcoholic. FML

#20189765
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20739) - you deserved it (2214)

On 12/03/2012 at 6:01pm - misc - by VedaLynn - United States

Today, I got a call from my boyfriend saying I needed to come home immediately. When I got there, he informed me that the reason I needed to rush home from work was because he wiped a booger on the wall and it was in the shape of a penis. He said it's a sign, like when people see Jesus in toast. FML

#20189885
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20681) - you deserved it (2908)

On 12/03/2012 at 7:38pm - misc - by FlyingFist - United States

Today, I caught the train into the city. Halfway there some kids hopped on smelling of marijuana and alcohol. Their topic of discussion? How much pubic hair they had. FML

#20183521
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20581) - you deserved it (2855)

On 11/29/2012 at 12:40am - kids - by fabs1171 - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while I was at a urinal, a man came up to use the one next to me. He then said, "I guess this is where all the dicks hang out." He then stared at me until I left. FML

#20190054
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20428) - you deserved it (1584)

On 12/03/2012 at 9:14pm - misc - by reedcarter -

Today, I ran across the street due to a line of cars waiting for me to cross. Just as I reached the other side, my iPhone slipped out of my hand and fell into the road, just in time to get run over by multiple cars, one after the other. FML

#20181219
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20399) - you deserved it (6581)

On 11/27/2012 at 1:45pm - misc - by unknown - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, while getting a hernia exam, I accidentally ran my fingers through my doctor's hair. FML

#20188881
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20383) - you deserved it (7845)

On 12/03/2012 at 12:06am - health - by WTFFAIL (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my 5 kids were singing their favorite Christmas carols in the van, each trying to sing louder than the others. It would have probably sounded better if they were all singing the same song. FML

#20183806
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20278) - you deserved it (3909)

On 11/29/2012 at 9:22am - kids - by Dave (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I got into a fight with my girlfriend. After yelling and arguing my point, my cat got up and jumped up next to her on the bed. He sat down, and they both glared at me until I left. FML

#20189474
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20237) - you deserved it (3665)

On 12/03/2012 at 2:02pm - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at a talent show, my band got booed before we even started playing. FML

#20188582
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20202) - you deserved it (2802)

On 12/02/2012 at 9:26pm - misc - by disembob - United Kingdom

Today, I found out what the two girls I sit near to fight about every day: seating. The loser has to sit next to me. FML

#20189404
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19906) - you deserved it (1772)

On 12/03/2012 at 12:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, my mom found her CD of cats and dogs singing Christmas songs. That is what I'll be listening to until Christmas. FML

#20186305
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19766) - you deserved it (1610)

On 12/01/2012 at 5:00am - misc - by hinowdie - United States

Today, while visiting my widowed great aunt, she took out her wedding rings and talked about the love she and my uncle had. Smiling, I told her that one day I hope to have as happy a marriage as theirs. Her response? "Knowing you, I wouldn't count on it." My mother sat there agreeing. FML

#20189035
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19368) - you deserved it (2077)

On 12/03/2012 at 2:17am - misc - by Stupendous_ - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I had just had a shower, when I noticed that the mix of my shower gel and deodorant smelled like Lynx Dark Temptation. I was happy, as this is my favourite men's deodorant, until I realised I was happily sniffing my own boobs because they smelled like my ex-boyfriend. FML



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