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Monday 26 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my son turned 8. We watched as he unwrapped a $55 Nerf gun, extra 'bullets', new shoes and a school bag with his favorite TV character on the front and a action figure inside. As he finished he looked me straight in the eyes and says, "That's great ma, but seriously what'd you get me?". FML

#20187584
325 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25099) - you deserved it (8194)

On 12/02/2012 at 3:19am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm breaking up with her because she's very abusive. After a couple of seconds of awkward silence, she kicked me in the nuts and ran away. FML

#20189170
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24832) - you deserved it (3455)

On 12/03/2012 at 6:53am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, my girlfriend accused me of cheating, because I tipped our waitress at dinner. FML

#20186136
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23994) - you deserved it (2131)

On 12/01/2012 at 12:59am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, I came home to my mother-in-law wearing the gold chain which I usually keep in a hidden drawer. I searched my drawer only to find out my chain was missing. I asked my mother-in-law if she took it and she keeps denying the fact that she stole it from me. My husband is on her side. FML

#20183636
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23581) - you deserved it (1339)

On 11/29/2012 at 3:01am - misc - by elizabeth - United States (Nevada)

Today, my parents told me that they had joined a local club. Proud of them for going out of their comfort zone to make new friends, I googled the name of the club. I'm sure they'll make some lifelong friends at their first swingers club meet. FML

#20179494
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23453) - you deserved it (2550)

On 11/26/2012 at 8:30am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh, City of)

Today, I have three cracked ribs. I have also, for the first time in my life, developed a case of the hiccups that simply will NOT go away. It's been hours. FML

#20184990
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23282) - you deserved it (1264)

On 11/30/2012 at 2:30am - health - by Atletic - United States (New York)

Today, I decided to be responsible and call a cab to take my drunk ass home from the bar. As I climbed into the cab, I was quickly pulled back out and had the shit beaten out of me by a group of drunk guys who thought they needed the ride more. The police soon arrived and arrested us all. FML

#20180075
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23183) - you deserved it (2170)

On 11/26/2012 at 6:11pm - misc - by ronboy - United States (Ohio)

Today, my wife wants to name our first child Siri, after the iPhone function. FML

#20182157
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22930) - you deserved it (2211)

On 11/28/2012 at 1:06am - misc - by boo8713 (man) - United States (California)

Today, while I was removing my makeup with my boyfriend watching, he mentioned that he used to think girls were prettier without makeup on, but he'd now changed his mind. FML

#20187008
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22359) - you deserved it (2491)

On 12/01/2012 at 6:54pm - love - by allbrokeup (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, as I was about to walk across the street, a girl in front of me who clearly wasn't paying attention to the traffic, almost got run over. I grabbed her arm and jumped back. She was fine. I fell and fractured my arm and wrist. FML

#20182568
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21947) - you deserved it (1850)

On 11/28/2012 at 12:43pm - health - by williebees - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to a restaurant with my boyfriend. After dessert, he went to the bathroom so I quickly called the waiter over and paid the bill, thinking it was a nice gesture. When he returned, he broke up with me for "emasculating" him. FML

#20180957
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21926) - you deserved it (3797)

On 11/27/2012 at 6:36am - love - by Clementine (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my parents heard from my sister that I'd recently lost my virginity to my girlfriend. I've never been bitched out so viciously in my life, and yet my sister, whom everyone knows has had numerous casual sexual partners this year, is treated like a princess 24/7. FML

#20188038
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21843) - you deserved it (1708)

On 12/02/2012 at 1:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Suffolk)

Today, after being single for a while now, I unwillingly went on a blind date with a guy my friend convinced me would be perfect for me. He took me to McDonald's; his father was with him the whole entire time. He is 27. FML

#20180462
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21823) - you deserved it (1775)

On 11/26/2012 at 10:13pm - love - by N - Denmark (Hovedstaden)



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