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Sunday 25 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was out clubbing, when I saw a pair of very cute girls sitting at the bar, so I went over, hoping to introduce myself. I swung my leg over the stool, and through no fault of my own, sat on my own balls. I quickly got thrown out for "harassing the ladies." FML

#20185753
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7766) - you deserved it (18602)

On 11/30/2012 at 7:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my room-mates were inspired by a TV show to make a "douchebag jar", into which we have to put money every time we say something obnoxious. It seems like I can't open my mouth without having to cough up £10. FML

#20176638
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7575) - you deserved it (24637)

On 11/24/2012 at 1:41pm - misc - by kay51 (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I was walking home, when I realized I didn't have my phone on me. After retracing my steps, I realized that I'd been listening to music from my phone the entire time. FML

#20177683
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7517) - you deserved it (27734)

On 11/25/2012 at 2:12am - misc - by Jocelyn - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my friends and I were playing truth or dare game. It was late and we were drunk, so they dared me to run naked into my neighbor's yard while yelling, "Help! The pixies took my penis!" I ran screaming right into their big family reunion. FML

#20172584
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7430) - you deserved it (32680)

On 11/21/2012 at 4:06pm - misc - by nekkidness (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I'm recovering in the emergency room. How did I get here? Intoxicated at a coed party, I saw a hole in the host's shed and thought it funny to christen it a "glory-hole", only to be bitten by what may well have been a black widow spider. FML

#20182587
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6433) - you deserved it (43436)

On 11/28/2012 at 1:09pm - health - by Widowmaker - United States (Nevada)

Today, I followed my neighbor's advice and sprayed Sprite on my Christmas tree because it will "make it live longer." I just came downstairs to find my Christmas tree covered in ants. FML

#20186141
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6379) - you deserved it (37035)

On 12/01/2012 at 1:01am - misc - by Chuffy - United States (Colorado)



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