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Monday 5 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my dog and I were sitting on the couch. I went to the bathroom, came back, and saw him walk over the remote, which caused the TV to change to the Hustler channel, just a few moments before my girlfriend walked through the door. FML

#20157085
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22169) - you deserved it (3340)

On 11/10/2012 at 1:51am - animals - by Sam l. - United States

Today, I was renovating the house, and my girlfriend asked, "Do you use electrical tape on electrical stuff?" Not knowing where she was going with this, I just gave her a puzzled look. She continued by saying, "Because it's not like people use duct tape on ducks." FML

#20158312
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22112) - you deserved it (2986)

On 11/11/2012 at 12:05am - love - by Danny - United States (Utah)

Today, my friend joked to my co-workers that my kitty-cat of a husband was going to beat me for spending $200 on shoes. Later on, my rather large dog was so excited to see me when I walked in the door, he split my lip. Somehow, I don't think they'll believe me when I get to the office tomorrow. FML

#20150093
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22091) - you deserved it (2886)

On 11/06/2012 at 4:32am - work - by iLuvsIt (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I enjoyed a lovely family dinner, but my irritating grandma kept trying to buy my purse off me, and kept picking it up to look at it. When I got home I realized all my cash and cigarettes were gone. FML

#20149150
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22069) - you deserved it (2872)

On 11/05/2012 at 5:11pm - money - by Brooklyn - United States (Oregon)

Today, I'm so broke, I asked my parents if they'd pay for me to go to the eye doctor and consider it my Christmas present. FML

#20149436
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22008) - you deserved it (1957)

On 11/05/2012 at 8:01pm - money - by EB - United States

Today, my teacher wore a bikini at the pool. She is 68. FML

#20153506
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21991) - you deserved it (3923)

On 11/07/2012 at 1:39pm - work - by Owen - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I overheard my mom talking on the phone with my sister about how much they hate my fiancé. My wedding is in two weeks and my family has been pretending to like my future husband for three years. FML

#20148569
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21808) - you deserved it (1836)

On 11/05/2012 at 6:36am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was told I will be having twins; this came as a shock since there are no twins in my family. When I asked my mom about it, she said that she wasn't surprised and not to worry about it because she had "absorbed her twin" and that the problem would "take care of itself." FML

#20154574
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21593) - you deserved it (1707)

On 11/08/2012 at 1:13am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, after finally falling asleep, my boyfriend woke me up and got extremely mad at me. My offense? My pillow was touching his side of the bed. After yelling at me, he's now sleeping on the couch, and I'm lying in bed wide awake. FML

#20158574
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21406) - you deserved it (2596)

On 11/11/2012 at 5:26am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, a stray dog came up to my living room window. My pitbull went into attack mode and tried to jump through said window, while it was closed. Now I have to pay to replace the window, and pay to get stitches for my idiot dog. FML

#20153727
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21339) - you deserved it (7154)

On 11/07/2012 at 4:30pm - animals - by Drafty (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed. My girlfriend had agreed to come over after and make sure I was okay, so I called her, saying I was done. She told me she'd made new plans, and to "just suck on a tampon, you pussy". FML

#20156617
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21329) - you deserved it (2793)

On 11/09/2012 at 7:16pm - health - by dating a fking cnt (man) - Canada

Today, my mother-in-law moved in because she has a hip problem. I don't know what's worse, her constant complaining and slob like tendencies, or the eight cats she brought along with her. FML

#20154544
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21319) - you deserved it (1748)

On 11/08/2012 at 12:43am - misc - by David (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, after a year of living with my boyfriend at our new place, he told me that he wants to sell our house and live in a trailer, so he can be closer to his mom. FML

#20155172
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20871) - you deserved it (2225)

On 11/08/2012 at 4:22pm - misc - by Anonimo (woman) - Italy (Sardegna)



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