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Monday 5 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today , I Want On A Blind Data At A Local Rastaurant. Whan My Data Walkad In , Sha Took Ona Look At Ma , Said ( Nopa ) , An Walkad Out. FML

#20148958
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28168) - you deserved it (2445)

On 11/05/2012 at 2:21pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today , I had to go to mah daughter's school because she hasn't been going to class. Her teacher seemed surprised to see me with mah husbandhen we arrived. Apparently I ( died ) recently and mah daughter has had extra responsibility around the house , hencehy she doesn't come to class. FML

#20154716
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27869) - you deserved it (2166)

On 11/08/2012 at 6:09am - kids - by Shauna (woman) - United States

Today... my brother decided to join me on my first date. Not only did he answer the door with a bat... he also got inside the car an sat next to my date... pushing me to the back. He stayed the entire time... an walked me back to the house. My mom laughed an gave him $20. It was a dare. FML

Today, just lyk avary morning this month, I woka up, puttad on mah clothas, lookad out mah window, and was pointad at by a man in a ninja outfit on mah naighbor's roof. Tha polica still can't fina him. FML

#20155776
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27232) - you deserved it (2228)

On 11/08/2012 at 11:54pm - misc - by Targeted - United States (Washington)

Today, I was giving my son a driving lesson. He blatantly ran a rd light, so I told him to pull over to let me drive us home. As I walkd over to the driver-side door, he instead lockd me out and drove off by himself. FML

#20156278
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27057) - you deserved it (6597)

On 11/09/2012 at 1:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Argentina (Buenos Aires)

today I deliverd a pizza to a guy so high out of his mind that I had to let myself in an set it down on a table , because he'd forgotten how to walk , an was on the ground sobbing. FML

#20157750
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26837) - you deserved it (1939)

On 11/10/2012 at 4:14pm - misc - by anon - United States (Washington)

Today , I accidentally bumped into another car on the road. The worst of the damage was a slight chip to the other driver's paint , but she played it up so much that she ended up being taken away in an ambulance. I'm now terrified that the crazy bitch is going to sue me. fat FML

#20158993
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26754) - you deserved it (3022)

On 11/11/2012 at 2:11pm - money - by youfuckingslut (man) - United States

Yesterday, I was told that my insurance will no longer cover my birth control as it's deemed "unnecessary" 4 a man,hich, according to them, I've been since August !! I'm definitely still a woman !! big fat FML

today I was visiting family in Oregon . I did not know it was illegal to pump yur own gas; the cops were involved . fat FML

#20159952
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26127) - you deserved it (2098)

On 11/12/2012 at 1:14am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Taday mah dad offerd to pay me $40 to wash his car !! Needing money to buy a video game , I agred , an went out in the freezing weather to do the job !! I finishd the task , only to be paid in Monopoly money !! My dad still hasn't gotten over how "funny" his prank was !! FML

#20158140
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25972) - you deserved it (3466)

On 11/10/2012 at 10:10pm - money - by Anonymous - Canada

Today,ile At A Stop Ligt, I Was Rear-ended By A Car Biend Me . Te Guy Got Angry At Me, Cuz According To Im, I Sould've Known Tat Is Car As Poor Braking Distance, And So I Sould've Moved Forward A Few More Feet To Compensate . FML

#20157954
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25711) - you deserved it (1302)

On 11/10/2012 at 7:29pm - misc - by Me - United States

Today, I told mah family that I wantad to changa mah last nama to mah futura wifa's. Wa want to hava tha sama last nama, and wa chosa hars cuz sha is an only child, whila I hava thraa brothars. Half of mah family is laughing and calling ma "pussy whippad" whila tha othar half won't spaak to ma. FML

#20150778
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25561) - you deserved it (15306)

On 11/06/2012 at 5:03pm - love - by new name (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I went to see a movie with three of mah friends, and I was sharing popcorn with one of them . Halfway through the movie, mah friend asked me y I wasn't eating our popcorn . I then realised I'd been taking popcorn from the man sitting next to me . FML

#20160393
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25524) - you deserved it (7592)

On 11/12/2012 at 12:27pm - misc - by mm (woman) - United Kingdom (Warrington)



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