Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?
Email notification?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Wednesday 31 October 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, a customer smiled, looked me in the eye and described to me in graphic detail the swelling that occurred to his nuts after his vasectomy. FML

#20142730
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13212) - you deserved it (977)

On 11/01/2012 at 9:52am - work - by tmi. - Australia

Today, I was at the mall and I noticed this guy staring at me from across the food court. He smiled and waved at me so I walked over there and tried to talk to him. He was looking at his girlfriend the whole time. FML

#20138654
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12699) - you deserved it (3467)

On 10/29/2012 at 1:59pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, while studying liver pathology and highlighting important lines in my textbook, I realized that I could count the number of words I hadn't highlighted on one hand, over the last six pages. FML

#20143160
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11986) - you deserved it (7108)

On 11/01/2012 at 5:18pm - misc - by ThisisMedSchool - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I looked over to see my grandfather looking thoughtfully at me. Feeling flattered because he rarely shows affection, I waved at him. He then said, "I was looking out the window" and continued to stare past my head out of the window. FML

#20150050
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11347) - you deserved it (1037)

On 11/06/2012 at 2:59am - misc - by Unappreciated Grandchild - United States (Maryland)

Today, at work I was trying to be nice and give a customer a discount because she was having trouble finding money to pay for her food. Everybody behind her then demanded a discount as well. FML

#20147029
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9294) - you deserved it (15643)

On 11/04/2012 at 9:16am - work - by cassiebee - United States (Utah)

Today, I jokingly asked my girlfriend what she got me for my half birthday, to which she replied "A baby." She was serious. FML

#20138663
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8542) - you deserved it (16111)

On 10/29/2012 at 2:10pm - kids - by JiggaJayZ - United States

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, whilst in an argument with my girlfriend, I told her she was the craziest bitch I'd ever met. She responded with "Challenge accepted." I'm now terrified. FML

#20139786
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7519) - you deserved it (28109)

On 10/30/2012 at 2:08am - love - by Andrew (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend, saying I had a lot on my plate. She responded by throwing an empty plate at my windshield. FML

#20138170
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7394) - you deserved it (16113)

On 10/29/2012 at 1:46am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I woke up and looked over to see the "beautiful girl" I slept with last night. Turns out it was the obsessive girl from my class with a man-face I had avoided all semester. In conclusion, beer goggles are very real and very powerful. FML

#20149916
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7255) - you deserved it (27835)

On 11/06/2012 at 12:15am - intimacy - by coolguy (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, while getting intimate with my girlfriend, she asked me to whisper her name. Apparently, her name is not Kate. FML

#20140315
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7042) - you deserved it (50345)

On 10/30/2012 at 3:46pm - intimacy - by you (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I woke up with a vague memory of buying something last night while drunk. According to my credit card summary I made a $270 purchase from a home shopping channel. I guess in 5-7 days I'll find out what it was. FML

#20147165
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6919) - you deserved it (17263)

On 11/04/2012 at 11:37am - money - by fnfantastic - United States (Indiana)

Today, after nearly a year of headaches and fuzzy vision, I went to the eye doctor. It turns out I've had my contacts in the wrong eyes for a year. FML

#20144283
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6859) - you deserved it (28422)

On 11/02/2012 at 11:39am - health - by Midnightpearls - United States

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my hair straightener broke. My husband suggested putting electrical tape on it because it was heat proof. I did and started straightening my hair. The supposed heat proof tape melted and got stuck in my hair. FML

#20145539
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6316) - you deserved it (19477)

On 11/03/2012 at 9:50am - misc - by Anonymous - United States



FML's blog

  • Sharina's Illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! Glad to see you all again, hope you’re doing fine and dandy. We are, amazing stuff has happened in amongst all the drudge and sludge. We’ve spent the week listening to the greatest album ever…

Friday 24 May 2013

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on:

© 2008-2013 by