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Tuesday 30 October 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, after weeks of wondering if my cat has a fetish for licking my bed covers, I finally witnessed him licking up an ant off of the covers. Turns out that my bed is infested with ants. FML

#20138030
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20216) - you deserved it (4398)

On 10/29/2012 at 12:23am - animals - by lifelike (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was working in a call center when I smelled perfume. I'm allergic, and it triggered my asthma. When I came back, some jerk had sprayed it all over my work area. I couldn't go near it for the rest of my shift, therefore I had to go home early, and got my paycheck docked. FML

#20143862
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20205) - you deserved it (1647)

On 11/02/2012 at 12:13am - work - by John - United States

Today, I was playing with my cat. I tried to put him on my stomach, but he refused to stay put. Ever since I lost weight, he won't lay with me or purr. I think my fat was the only thing he liked about me. FML

#20150645
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20151) - you deserved it (2267)

On 11/06/2012 at 3:27pm - animals - by creedonfied - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I watched my girlfriend slowly floss her teeth, and then eat what showed up on the floss. FML

#20147554
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20112) - you deserved it (2425)

On 11/04/2012 at 4:16pm - misc - by i fking love docb - Virgin Islands, U.S.

Today, I was woken up by my husband attempting to breastfeed off my lactating nipples. FML

#20139029
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19898) - you deserved it (2547)

On 10/29/2012 at 6:22pm - misc - by Indianagirl94 (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were going through some troubles in our relationship, and she said to me, "No offense, but I really hope no other relationship I have in the future will be like this one." Some offense taken. FML

#20141147
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19845) - you deserved it (2452)

On 10/31/2012 at 12:22am - love - by anon (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my friend joked to my co-workers that my kitty-cat of a husband was going to beat me for spending $200 on shoes. Later on, my rather large dog was so excited to see me when I walked in the door, he split my lip. Somehow, I don't think they'll believe me when I get to the office tomorrow. FML

#20150093
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19320) - you deserved it (2570)

On 11/06/2012 at 4:32am - work - by iLuvsIt (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, at archery practice, I jokingly said that I'd kiss the next person to get a bullseye. They all made a point of missing their targets, some even shooting their arrows way off to the side. FML

#20146224
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19125) - you deserved it (6527)

On 11/03/2012 at 8:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was planning on enjoying my one day off work from the hospital, at home. I got a call saying I had to come in because my department was short-handed. I went in to find almost everyone there. Turns out it was a prank by my coworkers. FML

#20148851
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19080) - you deserved it (1226)

On 11/05/2012 at 12:33pm - work - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, my company had a Halloween party. I was so excited seeing as our company never does anything, so I pulled out all the stops with my costume. I was the only one who got dressed up. FML

#20144153
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19027) - you deserved it (2682)

On 11/02/2012 at 8:17am - work - by PieterseMJ - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, I was reading a book in public. Some bastard stranger came over and started spoiling the plot for me. FML

#20148752
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18990) - you deserved it (1755)

On 11/05/2012 at 10:58am - misc - by Spoilicious - Singapore

Today, my girlfriend's mother came over for a few hours. After she left I went to grab a drink, only to find that three bottles of expensive liquor were missing from our liquor cabinet. FML

#20148667
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18708) - you deserved it (1456)

On 11/05/2012 at 9:02am - misc - by liquorless (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at a red light, my mom started to tell me that she and my dad hadn't had sex in months, that they "probably won't bounce back from this one," and are most likely getting a divorce. FML

#20151103
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18604) - you deserved it (1274)

On 11/06/2012 at 8:29pm - misc - by rastamerican - United States (California)



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