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October 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, after my dad trying every bait, hormone, and poison, the cockroaches in this apartment have gone crazy. They are trying to kill themselves. One tried to commit suicide, by suffocation, in my mouth this morning. FML

#21282365
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34883) - you deserved it (3106)

On 10/21/2014 at 11:42am - misc - by youngboob (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, the guy I really like acknowledged my existence for the first time. Too bad it was through a text saying "lol ur a fat fukc". FML

#21271187
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34848) - you deserved it (3454)

On 10/05/2014 at 12:02pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I tried to propose to my girlfriend, but I was so nervous that I had a panic attack, fainted and split my head open. My girlfriend then fainted at the sight of the blood. An onlooker had to call an ambulance for both of us. FML

#21280696
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34836) - you deserved it (3373)

On 10/18/2014 at 9:23pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my husband told me he cheated on me two years ago with his ex-fiancée. In the process, he got her pregnant, but said it was okay, because she didn't keep it. FML

#21284646
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34824) - you deserved it (2360)

On 10/24/2014 at 9:23pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I rode my new motorcycle to work for the first time. As I accelerated, I felt a sharp pain in my neck. Apparently, poisonous spiders can actually get trapped inside motorbike helmets. Duly noted. FML

Today, after my first day at work at a local daycare, I found out that I'm not entitled to breaks because I'm the only worker there who doesn't smoke. My boss asked me, ''What do you need a break for?'' FML

#21284495
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34760) - you deserved it (2531)

On 10/24/2014 at 4:52pm - work - by Anonymous - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I stood up too quickly and got dizzy, so I sat on the edge of the bed to regain my balance. I started dozing off to sleep again, got confused, and peed down the side of my bed thinking I was on the toilet. FML

#21272641
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34704) - you deserved it (9163)

On 10/07/2014 at 7:33am - misc - by Waterfalls (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I received an email from an angry parent, demanding that I give his daughter an A on a project which I had given her a 0 on. The project was to pick an article related to science and to write an essay on it. Hers was a hoax article relating to Ebola patients rising from the dead. FML

#21276337
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34514) - you deserved it (4926)

On 10/12/2014 at 4:46pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found a decomposing hamster deep in my closet. My daughter had hidden "Peach" after accidentally killing it and said it had ran away a month ago. And I'd believed her. FML

#21271391
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34497) - you deserved it (4052)

On 10/05/2014 at 5:34pm - kids - by SmellyCloset (man) - United States (California)

Today, I have to make a decision. I either drive my dad around during the day so he can drink, or I let him drink and drive so I can focus on studying for my exams. FML

#21280767
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34420) - you deserved it (2507)

On 10/18/2014 at 11:03pm - misc - by problems - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I was boxing up all my brother's old stuff to take to the attic. I came across a box, and without checking what was inside, I took it up, just to have it fall on my head, to then find out it was filled with dead baby hamsters. FML

#21276741
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34368) - you deserved it (3219)

On 10/13/2014 at 4:13am - animals - by MissBeyoncé - Namibia (Windhoek)

Today, my brother and I were talking about Ebola, when he says he would love to have the disease because of how famous it would make him. Plus, his college essays about him "fighting through the disease" would be "phenomenal". FML

#21278125
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34272) - you deserved it (3029)

On 10/15/2014 at 12:55am - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my son was smart enough to hack the school's computers to change his midterm, but isn't smart enough to actually keep his grades up. FML

#21273806
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34266) - you deserved it (3547)

On 10/08/2014 at 9:12pm - kids - by thenegatives - United States (Pennsylvania)



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