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July 2015

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I dropped my phone in the toilet in a public restroom. That would have been bad enough, without the guy in the next stall saying, "Jesus! What the hell did you eat?!" FML

#21443162
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25608) - you deserved it (2979)

On 07/17/2015 at 7:04pm - misc - by AK-47 (man) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I was having a dream about Chris Pratt. Instead of having a sexy dream that I would have enjoyed, I dreamt he was a supervisor at my work. He kept telling me how much I sucked. FML

#21437326
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25606) - you deserved it (2838)

On 07/06/2015 at 11:14am - intimacy - by BrittUnicorn - United States (Tennessee)

Today, after working alone in a room all day, I let a fart sneak out. Just then, my drop dead gorgeous boss and two new girls walked in. I could literally see them hit the stench and cringe. FML

#21434600
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25572) - you deserved it (4267)

On 06/30/2015 at 10:40pm - work - by stink - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was having a dinner party. My guests were getting along really well. I mean, really well; it turns out they all went to the same high school. For the next five hours, I hosted a high school reunion for a school I didn't even go to, in my own home. FML

#21441771
12 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25570) - you deserved it (2408)

On 07/14/2015 at 10:11pm - misc - by trappedinmyownhome (woman) -

Today, one of my friends asked me to flirt with her boyfriend to see if he would flirt back. Knowing this was a trust test, I agreed. She got pissed at me when he flirted back and still isn't speaking to me. FML

#21436223
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25567) - you deserved it (4399)

On 07/04/2015 at 4:55am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I'm babysitting for kids whose parents said they would be back by 12. Its 4am and they still aren't home. I don't get paid enough for this. FML

#21435758
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25542) - you deserved it (1762)

On 07/03/2015 at 5:09am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, a very intoxicated man came in to my workplace and bought 50 dollars worth of yogurt, talked about the fact that he shouldn't have to wear pants in public, then threw up all over the register. FML

Today, I had to explain to several young children why asking the new blind girl to play hide and seek with them is inappropriate. FML

#21439546
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25523) - you deserved it (2215)

On 07/10/2015 at 12:52pm - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, my boyfriend's dad helped me put coolant in my car. When I said I wished I could do something in return, he told me to get an abortion so I wouldn't "ruin" his son's life. When I told my boyfriend, he didn't believe me. FML

#21444969
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25513) - you deserved it (2284)

On 07/21/2015 at 11:17am - misc - by father-in-nope (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I lost my virginity. The most memorable aspect of it wasn't the fact that my boyfriend finished after two thrusts, but rather the fact that he first said, "The pilot has entered the cockpit." FML

#21443446
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25482) - you deserved it (2764)

On 07/18/2015 at 7:09am - intimacy - by henhouse - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was finally starting to relax after a stressful and expensive move, where I had to give up half my belongings and furniture, as well as my cat. All the stress came rushing back as my new landlord told me that he's selling the building and I've got 30 days to vacate. FML

#21439528
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25446) - you deserved it (1864)

On 07/10/2015 at 11:49am - misc - by Stevarious (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went by myself to do a birthday party in a park, dressed as Elsa from Frozen. Everything was going fine until another Elsa and an Anna showed up to a nearby party. The kids then decided I was a fake and pulled my wig off. FML

#21439169
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25348) - you deserved it (2204)

On 07/09/2015 at 7:08pm - work - by princessrose - United States (Kansas)

Today, my family claimed that I haven't ever broken a bone because I don't do anything risky. I broke my arm by falling in the shower less than 2 hours later and my entire family thinks I did it to prove a point. FML

#21436352
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25349) - you deserved it (1993)

On 07/04/2015 at 1:56pm - misc - by hamurobby82 - United States (Texas)



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