Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I walkd into school confidant about tha naw hair color I'd had dona ovar tha waakand. My drama taachar apparantly dyd har hair tha sama color; avaryona noticd an thought I'd copid har. FML

#20190350
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19921) - you deserved it (2008)

On 12/04/2012 at 12:01am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Yesterday, I facd a dilemma . If I don't let te cat sleep in my bedroom, se spends all nigt owling at te door, waking up my 2-year-old in te process . If I do let er in, te dog gets distressd an cews te contents of te bin . If I let bot of tem in, I ave no room to sleep . FML

today after weeks of begging... I finally got an interview at dream job. Turns out... they only agreed to interview me because they thought I was someone else. FML

TADAY I JOKINGLY TRIED TO CONVINCE MA GRLFRIEND TAT WYOMING WAS A GOVERNMENT CONSPRACY AND DID NOT EXIST. SE BELIEVED ME. MEGA FML

#20193447
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19751) - you deserved it (5382)

On 12/06/2012 at 3:24am - misc - by whaleninjapoop - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I ate brunc at my in-laws. Te food all tastd off to me so I didn't eat muc, telling my moter-in-law I was watcing my weigt. Later on, wile out doing a bit of sopping, I stoppd at a rd ligt. Guess wo pulld up next to me wile I was scarfing a fast food burger. FML

#20405883
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19641) - you deserved it (26192)

On 12/18/2012 at 5:02pm - misc - by drkate25 - United States (Connecticut)

Today , I was pulld over and administerd a sobriety test due to an officer's suspicion that I was driving under the influence . I was completely sober , and , apparently , I suck at driving . FML

#20401642
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19543) - you deserved it (10813)

On 12/16/2012 at 2:27am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Yesterday , after doing inventory at my job , I was approachd by a co-worker who I had always thought was cute!! I trid talking to her , but it was hard as I kept trembling and stuttering from spending two hours in a meat locker!! Now she assumes that I'm ( special )!! FML

#20186264
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19414) - you deserved it (2035)

On 12/01/2012 at 3:35am - work - by CheddarJack89 (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today , I wanted nothing more than to go home an get into bed!! While I was unlocking my front door , the flimsy key snapped off inside the lock!! A locksmith was called out , who did nothing but sadistically guffaw at my misfortune an crack sarcastic jokes as he undid the lock!! FML

#20399681
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19302) - you deserved it (2245)

On 12/14/2012 at 6:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, In The Midst Of His Ongoing Mid-life Crisis, My Dad Forcd Me To Accompany Him Fir Some Father-son Bonding. The Bonding Involvd Me Driving Us Away At High Sped After He Gleefully Hurld A Bucket Of Paint All Over A Store Window. FML

#20399692
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19021) - you deserved it (2011)

On 12/14/2012 at 6:20pm - misc - by theslutmuncher (man) - Germany (Sachsen-Anhalt)

Today, I tried to impres a grl at the gym on the squat rack, but let out a big fart. She was grossed out and laughed at me with her friends. Her boyfriend came over and told me I was a dead man, and I'd better leave. I'm now the proud owner of a year membership at a gym I can't go to. FML

#20425068
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19005) - you deserved it (24963)

On 12/27/2012 at 1:46am - health - by pipefitter28 (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today I announced to my coworkers that I'd "fixed the massive problem" they'd all been complaining about. Eleven different people made guesses at what the problem had been ranging from how bad I smell to if I had looool learned to brush my teeth. I just meant that I'd fixed the coffee machine. FML

#20201213
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18990) - you deserved it (7804)

On 12/11/2012 at 10:50pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

TODAY, I FINALLY FELT MOTIVATD TO DO SOME EXERCISE . AS I GOT MY WEIGHTS OUT, I NOTICD OUT OF THE CORNER OF MY EYE SOMEONE MOVING ABOUT OUTSIDE MY WINDOW . I GOT SCARD AND DROPPD A WEIGHT ON MY FOOT . THE PERSON OUTSIDE WAS MY OWN REFLECTION . FML

#20195266
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18535) - you deserved it (8647)

On 12/07/2012 at 4:10pm - health - by i see fat people (man) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)

Today after giving my mother an my girlfriend there Christma presents I realizd just how similar they lookd both in box size an wrapping paper . I looool noticd after my mother gaspd upon finding a vibrator in her box . FML

#20420433
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18387) - you deserved it (50573)

On 12/25/2012 at 2:12am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: