Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I finally got my wedding photos in the mail. As I looked through them, I soon realized that the lace material on my wedding dress was completely see-through in the sunlight, and my bra and panties were visible in every single outdoor photo. I had an outdoor wedding. FML

#20397769
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27833) - you deserved it (8009)

On 12/13/2012 at 9:35am - misc - by AboutToGoKillBillOnSomeone (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my very cheap boyfriend of four years proposed. I was overwhelmed with emotion, since he bought such a huge, seemingly-diamond ring. I was later overwhelmed with emotion when my finger turned green. FML

#20201870
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27784) - you deserved it (3942)

On 12/12/2012 at 12:51pm - love - by dino0123 - United States (Virginia)

Today, my parents heard from my sister that I'd recently lost my virginity to my girlfriend. I've never been bitched out so viciously in my life, and yet my sister, whom everyone knows has had numerous casual sexual partners this year, is treated like a princess 24/7. FML

#20188038
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27777) - you deserved it (2257)

On 12/02/2012 at 1:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Suffolk)

Today, proving that there's no limit to the stupid shit people will do, my husband called me from hospital, needing a lift home. He tried planking on top of his car while his buddies sped it down a hill, and I now have to take care of him while his broken leg heals. FML

#20428520
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27772) - you deserved it (3552)

On 12/28/2012 at 7:50pm - misc - by say dump him and i'll kill you (woman) - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)

Today, I came home to find a mouse in the garage. Frantic, I killed it. My 7-year-old son came home from soccer, and started crying because he couldn't find the class pet, Mr. Whiskers. I killed my son's class pet. FML

#20194994
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27733) - you deserved it (16183)

On 12/07/2012 at 10:30am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was leaning over cleaning a table at work, when my pretty coworker came up behind me and slapped me on the butt. I was so startled that I slipped and smashed my face into the table. Now she can't look at me without laughing. FML

#20430634
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27685) - you deserved it (3129)

On 12/29/2012 at 8:01pm - work - by nose hurts (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my family went on a family trip without me. Their reason for not bringing me? My older sister wanted extra legroom during the drive. FML

Today, I was at church, when my mom's phone went off during the sermon. As if that wasn't humiliating enough for me, her ring tone was set to the Bed Intruder song. FML

#20430388
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27484) - you deserved it (3713)

On 12/29/2012 at 5:33pm - misc - by killme (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, "The Phantom of the Opera" soundtrack blasted me awake at 4 am. Not knowing how it got on my iPod, I checked and found I had bought the whole $17.00 album in my sleep. This is the second time this month; the first time I downloaded the soundtrack from "The Wizard of Oz". FML

#20198547
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27375) - you deserved it (6163)

On 12/10/2012 at 12:10am - money - by hailey - United States (Maryland)

Today, at a Christmas party, my crush came up to me and cutely pointed out that I was standing under mistletoe. The only response my stupid brain could think of was, "Probably full of nargles though." He gave me a confused look and walked away. FML

#20402533
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27364) - you deserved it (12917)

On 12/16/2012 at 6:51pm - love - by Rhine (woman) - Barbados (Saint Michael)

Today, my ex adopted a dog from the dog pound. It was the same dog he made me get rid of while we were still together. FML

#20401539
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27345) - you deserved it (7505)

On 12/16/2012 at 12:49am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I sold some weights that were way too heavy for me on Craigslist. I felt okay with not being able to lift them when I saw the other man, who was a pretty buff dude; that is until of course he informed me he was buying them for his wife. FML

#20407956
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27270) - you deserved it (7961)

On 12/19/2012 at 6:33pm - misc - by Johnny (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, when my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I got a nose bleed. He gave me a shirt to plug it with and kept going. FML

#20195821
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27155) - you deserved it (4981)

On 12/08/2012 at 12:33am - intimacy - by anon - United States



FML's blog

  • JT's illustrated FML
  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

Friday 22 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: