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December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm breaking up with her because she's very abusive. After a couple of seconds of awkward silence, she kicked me in the nuts and ran away. FML

#20189170
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31169) - you deserved it (4032)

On 12/03/2012 at 6:53am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, I came home to find all of the wood in my house either broken or gone. On the now legless table there was a note from my mother, saying that she needed the wood to build a boat, and that I will thank her when the world ends. FML

#20197527
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31151) - you deserved it (1828)

On 12/09/2012 at 10:29am - misc - by woodless (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went on a date. He stole my credit card. FML

Today, in history class, we were talking about Ancient Rome, and what childbirth would have been like back then. One girl asked in all seriousness why they didn't use ultrasound machines to see what sex their babies were. I have to deal with people like this on a daily basis. FML

#20398310
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31004) - you deserved it (2016)

On 12/13/2012 at 6:44pm - misc - by surrounded by dumbfucks (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, proving that there's no limit to the stupid shit people will do, my husband called me from hospital, needing a lift home. He tried planking on top of his car while his buddies sped it down a hill, and I now have to take care of him while his broken leg heals. FML

#20428520
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30976) - you deserved it (3881)

On 12/28/2012 at 7:50pm - misc - by say dump him and i'll kill you (woman) - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)

Today, I came home to find a mouse in the garage. Frantic, I killed it. My 7-year-old son came home from soccer, and started crying because he couldn't find the class pet, Mr. Whiskers. I killed my son's class pet. FML

#20194994
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30887) - you deserved it (17545)

On 12/07/2012 at 10:30am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I woke up to find my best friend lying down and unresponsive. Frightened, I tapped on the glass. He got scared and started swimming again. My best friend is a fish. FML

#20199342
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30865) - you deserved it (6914)

On 12/10/2012 at 5:40pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Vastmanlands Lan)

Today, my son got suspended from school. He's in kindergarten. FML

#20201910
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30760) - you deserved it (7273)

On 12/12/2012 at 1:32pm - kids - by Renzy (woman) -

Today, when my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I got a nose bleed. He gave me a shirt to plug it with and kept going. FML

#20195821
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30674) - you deserved it (5181)

On 12/08/2012 at 12:33am - intimacy - by anon - United States

Today, I played a game of Monopoly with my friends. Since I'm of Greek origin, they thought it would be funny to make me start with a €100,000 debt. FML

#20398504
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30659) - you deserved it (5393) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/13/2012 at 9:25pm - money - by Money-money-money (woman) - France

Today, I realized the dress I bought yesterday still had the security tag on. I returned to the store to get it removed, only to realize my receipt was misplaced. The lady at the counter thought I stole it, called security, and had me escorted out, dress-less. FML

#20196308
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30494) - you deserved it (4317)

On 12/08/2012 at 12:12pm - money - by bitchsawmebuyit - United States (New York)

Today, my mother has stooped to a new level of "hiding" Christmas gifts. She now just dumps them in the middle of the floor and says, "Don't look at them." If she even thinks I'm glancing in the direction of the pile, she will burst into a manic rage, and yell at me for "ruining the surprise." FML

#20408692
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30494) - you deserved it (7553)

On 12/20/2012 at 8:57am - misc - by Mandy93 (woman) - Germany (Rheinland-Pfalz)

Today, my very cheap boyfriend of four years proposed. I was overwhelmed with emotion, since he bought such a huge, seemingly-diamond ring. I was later overwhelmed with emotion when my finger turned green. FML

#20201870
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30462) - you deserved it (4228)

On 12/12/2012 at 12:51pm - love - by dino0123 - United States (Virginia)



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