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December 2012

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Today, my guy friend kept complaining that no one had asked him to the dance, so he probably wasn't going to go. I suggested that we go together. He laughed until his face was bright red and said, "I don't think I'll ever get that desperate." FML

#20187578
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29614) - you deserved it (2226)

On 12/02/2012 at 3:03am - love - by Anna - United States (Washington)

Today, I was riding the train and someone farted. Everyone looked at me. People always blame farts on the fat guy. FML

#20190789
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29600) - you deserved it (6273)

On 12/04/2012 at 11:04am - misc - by Banana (man) - Puerto Rico

Today, I realized that sex with my husband has gotten so boring that I'd rather fake an orgasm than let him continue. FML

#20199068
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29562) - you deserved it (11234)

On 12/10/2012 at 1:37pm - intimacy - by hnickell93 - United States (California)

Today, I walked in on my sister plucking her nipples. A shame I didn't get a big fuck-off bottle of brain bleach for Christmas. FML

#20422121
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29557) - you deserved it (7743)

On 12/25/2012 at 8:49pm - intimacy - by FuckMyEyes (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my friend was complaining to me about her problems. I tried to be a good, understanding friend, listening and giving advice. When it was my turn to vent, she interrupted me, saying, "Sorry, but I don't really care." FML

#20201674
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29546) - you deserved it (2344)

On 12/12/2012 at 7:44am - misc - by sushichick (woman) - United States

Today, I went to the local used books store to sell all my college textbooks. I spent several hundred dollars on them in total. I ended up walking out of the shop a pathetic $3.50 richer. FML

#20412112
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29325) - you deserved it (7015)

On 12/21/2012 at 7:11pm - money - by futuregigolo (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, one of the girls who has made it her job to ruin my life cornered me in the hallway at school. She tried to insult me, and for the first time in my life I had a scathing comeback. My elation quickly ended when she violently shoved my face into the water fountain. FML

Today, I had the pleasure of finding out how it feels to poop with 3 broken ribs. FML

#20398877
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29183) - you deserved it (1917)

On 12/14/2012 at 1:44am - health - by mysidesaresplitting - United States (Michigan)

Today, I opened my Christmas present from my parents. I got a road-side assistance package. I don't own a vehicle, and I don't even have a driver's license. FML

#20420365
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29166) - you deserved it (3213)

On 12/25/2012 at 1:41am - misc - by CambodianAsshole (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend sent me so many nice texts that he made me fall in love with him that little bit more. It turns out he was sweetening me up before telling me he cheated on me the night before. FML

#20192047
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29067) - you deserved it (2213)

On 12/05/2012 at 6:29am - love - by brokenhearted (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I was snooping around in my parents' closet to see what I would get for Christmas, when I came across a UPS package. It was the video game I ordered off eBay 3 weeks ago, addressed to me. They told me it had never arrived and said I should ask Santa to bring it to me. FML

#20195835
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29013) - you deserved it (4450)

On 12/08/2012 at 12:44am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was burgled while I was on the toilet. FML

#20402014
133 comments

Today, I was wrapping presents for my daughter, trying to be really quiet. Behind me, the cat decided to climb the tree, which then fell on top of me and I couldn't move. My daughter had to help me up. She now knows everything she's getting for Christmas this year. FML

#20417111
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28721) - you deserved it (4171)

On 12/23/2012 at 8:03pm - animals - by Christmas sucks - United States (Massachusetts)



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