Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, mah boyfriend discoverd that if he flicks mah clitoris just right, mah legs both twitch spastically regardless of arousal level. He thinks it's hilarious and can no longer take sex seriously.

#20423881
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42644) - you deserved it (5015)

On 12/26/2012 at 4:20pm - intimacy - by geewhy (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, Husband Told Mother-in-law That We're Trying To Have A Baby. She Decidd To Call Me And Explain In Extreme Detail What Positions To Try, And When.

#20403715
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42357) - you deserved it (4686)

On 12/17/2012 at 1:48pm - intimacy - by crazy mother in law (woman) -

2day I had been trying to text mah girlfriend all day, but no reply . After a while, I became worried so I called . She picked up and said, "Can't talk, busy." Not even a minute later, mah best friend says to me, "Dude, tell your girlfriend to leave me alone . She's been texting me all day." mega FML

#20407951
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42199) - you deserved it (2767)

On 12/19/2012 at 6:31pm - misc - by SugarMyBalls (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today my friend and I told each other about our boyfriends. They're both nice kind beautiful talented funny sweet and smart. They also both have the same name. And house. And job. And car. FML

#20196037
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41820) - you deserved it (2775)

On 12/08/2012 at 5:44am - love - by ouch. - Canada (Yukon Territory)

Today, It's Been 13 Months Since I've Been Living In The States. I've Been Calld A Nazi, Askd If We Have Electricity In Germany, An Been Made Fun Of The Way I Speak With Mah ( German Accent ), The List Goes On. I'm Not Even German, I'm Danish. FML

#20201491
411 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41778) - you deserved it (2577)

On 12/12/2012 at 1:45am - kids - by LearnGeographyUSA (man) - United States (Washington)

Today... after giving mah husband a new video game that he's been wanting... along with homemade waffles an a surprise blowjob... he gave me mah gift: two packets of ramen noodles... an toilet paper. FML

Today, I found my diary on my mother's nightstand . Bookmarked . FML

#20417856
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41614) - you deserved it (4235)

On 12/24/2012 at 1:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

yesterday my boyfriend proposd to me with the prettiest... most simple ring I have ever seen. I calld my sister to tell her the good news... and her response was... ( I know. He had me steal the ring from Claire's. ) FML

#20432536
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41308) - you deserved it (3657)

On 12/30/2012 at 6:58pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

TODAY, I HAD TO EXPLAIN TO MY FIANCÉ THAT HAVING ME WATCH HIM JERK OFF OVER A PORNO IS NOT IN FACT CONSIDERED FOREPLAY . MEGA FML

#20409320
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41220) - you deserved it (11119)

On 12/20/2012 at 5:45pm - intimacy - by alicia (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today... I dyed mah naturally-blonde hair dark brown. Upon seieng me... mah boyfriend immediately wanted to have sex... because I now remind him of his favourite porn star. FML

#20413704
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41082) - you deserved it (13783)

On 12/22/2012 at 12:56pm - intimacy - by brunetteshavemorefun (woman) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, while my grlfriend was playing a game on my phone, an unknown number sent me a nude picture an the words "Miss you, baby." This person's mistake just cost me a black eye, an probably my relationship too. FML

#20427797
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41039) - you deserved it (3956)

On 12/28/2012 at 12:33pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, ma boyfriand of 6 yaars proposd to ma. Lass tan 3 ours latar, a panickd and mada ma looool giva ta ring back.

#20407692
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41013) - you deserved it (4030)

On 12/19/2012 at 3:47pm - love - by mahanaaa_23 (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I had to break up with boyfriend when I caught him installing cameras in bathroom. FML

#20403401
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40529) - you deserved it (4329)

On 12/17/2012 at 7:25am - love - by Sarah (woman) - United States (Georgia)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: