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December 2012

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Today... Mah Ex-boyfriend Of Over 4 Yeres Decidd To Turn Up Outside Mah House At 1am... Drunk Off His Ass... To Confess His Love For Me. When I Told Him I'd Movd On And Am Happily Engagd... He Crid On The Grass For An Hour... Then Trid To Steal Mah Cat. FML

#20423470
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40075) - you deserved it (4043)

On 12/26/2012 at 12:18pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today , I gava mah girlfriand an orgasm. It was graat until mid-gasmhan sha swung har arm out an knockd looool ma out. Sha still can't stop laughing. FML

#20418972
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40047) - you deserved it (5776)

On 12/24/2012 at 2:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, my boyfriend told me his Christmas gift to me was custom made. I told my parents in excitement, thinking it could possibly be a ring. Half an hour later he told mehat it was; a moldd dildo of his penis. It's going to be an awkward conversation with my parentshen they askhat I got. FML

#20408274
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39788) - you deserved it (14280)

On 12/20/2012 at 12:30am - intimacy - by djl (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

yesterday I came home to fine a pregnancy test in trashcan !! I live alone with boyfriend and I'm not pregnant !! FML

#20430574
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39777) - you deserved it (2452)

On 12/29/2012 at 7:22pm - love - by melas303 - United States

Today, I had an amazing orgasm. So great that the shortness of breath triggerd an extreme asthma attack. FML

#20432803
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39750) - you deserved it (4969)

On 12/30/2012 at 9:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)

Yesterday... I Gave Mah Husband An Early Christmas Present: Santa-themd Lingerie. He Got Angry And Calld Me Selfish... For "using" Him As An Excuse To Get Myself Nice Stuff. FML

#20418722
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39441) - you deserved it (12909)

On 12/24/2012 at 1:06pm - intimacy - by selfishsexysanta (woman) - United States

Today.. . my girlfriend an I decidd to try a new place to eat . On our way home we both had upset stomachs . As we racd into the house we realizd niether of us could hold it any longer . Having only one bathroom.. . I let her go first . She explodd on the toilet an I explodd in my pants . FML

#20434472
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39430) - you deserved it (3701)

On 12/31/2012 at 5:36pm - work - by shattysituation - United States

TODAY I RECEIVED MAH SOCCER TEAM JACKET THAT I ORDERED A MONTH AGO. TRYING TO SAVE MONEY I'D SELECTED THE ( NO NAME ) OPTION TO AVOID AN EXTRA $20 EMBROIDERING FEE. MY JACKET NOW HAS ( NO NAME ) SPELLED OUT ON THE SIDE OF IT AND I WAS CHARGED THE EXTRA $20 DOLLARS AFTER ALL. FML

#20415162
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39266) - you deserved it (7211)

On 12/23/2012 at 12:01am - money - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today mah boyfriend and I were in bed and I asked him y he was with me. His answer was ( Well the last grl I dated was really smart and she alway made me feel dumb so I decided to switch thing up a bit. You make me feel lyk a geniu babe. ) mega FML

#20417781
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39196) - you deserved it (7430)

On 12/24/2012 at 12:33am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

today I was slapped acros the face by a grl in the waiting room at the dentist's office!! She thought I was taking a picture of her breast with mah phone!! I was smilinghile reading other people's FMLs!! FML

#20189568
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39022) - you deserved it (3170)

On 12/03/2012 at 3:35pm - misc - by karmamaybe - United States (South Dakota)

Today, a guy profassad his lova for ma in front of mah friands. Tha guy is mah first cousin. FML

#20414731
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38841) - you deserved it (3148)

On 12/22/2012 at 9:33pm - love - by Brittany (woman) - United States

Yesterday, a girl mistook me for her boyfriend and broke up with me because I'm ( a liar and a cheating bastard . ) I've never seen her in my life, but I'm so lonely that I tried to convince her to give me another chance and stay with me . FML

#20427124
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38787) - you deserved it (7975)

On 12/28/2012 at 12:24am - love - by Alone - United States

Taday after spending a lot of money on photo shoots to build up mah portfolio, I finally got an offer from a modelling agency. I ran outside to tell mah parents, only for mah brother to hurl an iced snowball straight into mah face. I now have a huge gash over mah cheek and nose. FML

#20428566
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38543) - you deserved it (4028)

On 12/28/2012 at 8:23pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)



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