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November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend while we were on my couch having a romantic moment. She seemed incredibly excited when she saw the ring and put it on. The way she bolted out the door tells me I'm not going to see her again. FML

#20163929
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24707) - you deserved it (1892)

On 11/15/2012 at 1:35am - love - by minime94 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I dressed up like a pirate, dressed my dog as a parrot and bought $30 worth of candy to pass out to trick-or-treaters. I waited by the door for 3 hours. Not one kid came. FML

#20142085
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24584) - you deserved it (2233)

On 10/31/2012 at 8:40pm - misc - by hallofail (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I received my first ever hand-job. It would have been great if she didn't wipe it across my face when I had finished and storm out of the room. FML

Today, I got into a car accident. The guy wouldn't give me his information, but instead stood there saying, "Like a good neighbor, Statefarm is there." FML

#20176033
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24130) - you deserved it (1668)

On 11/24/2012 at 12:55am - misc - by Read The Fine Print - United States (California)

Today, my daughter brought home her new boyfriend. He has a neck tattoo, and his life's dream is to be a professional "beer pong" player. FML

#20146654
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23929) - you deserved it (2821)

On 11/04/2012 at 1:30am - kids - by PleaseDontBeSerious - Canada

Today, I was giving my son a driving lesson. He blatantly ran a red light, so I told him to pull over to let me drive us home. As I walked over to the driver-side door, he instead locked me out and drove off by himself. FML

#20156278
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23926) - you deserved it (6133)

On 11/09/2012 at 1:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Argentina (Buenos Aires)

Today, I found out that my over-controlling parents would be moving in next door. I'm almost 23, and moved 5,365 KM away to get away from them. FML

#20142163
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23679) - you deserved it (1356)

On 10/31/2012 at 9:39pm - misc - by OhLovely (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I came home to my mother-in-law wearing the gold chain which I usually keep in a hidden drawer. I searched my drawer only to find out my chain was missing. I asked my mother-in-law if she took it and she keeps denying the fact that she stole it from me. My husband is on her side. FML

#20183636
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23579) - you deserved it (1339)

On 11/29/2012 at 3:01am - misc - by elizabeth - United States (Nevada)

Today, I went to see a movie with three of my friends, and I was sharing popcorn with one of them. Halfway through the movie, my friend asked me why I wasn't eating our popcorn. I then realised I'd been taking popcorn from the man sitting next to me. FML

#20160393
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23517) - you deserved it (7191)

On 11/12/2012 at 12:27pm - misc - by mm (woman) - United Kingdom (Warrington)

Today, whilst at a red light in my car, a homeless man with a spray bottle and a dirty rag came over to clean my windows. He started with the driver's window, which was wide open, and whatever was in his spray bottle smelled suspiciously like urine. FML

#20172058
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23500) - you deserved it (1853)

On 11/21/2012 at 4:54am - misc - by WamBamSam - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, I accidentally bumped into another car on the road. The worst of the damage was a slight chip to the other driver's paint, but she played it up so much that she ended up being taken away in an ambulance. I'm now terrified that the crazy bitch is going to sue me. FML

#20158993
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23480) - you deserved it (2692)

On 11/11/2012 at 2:11pm - money - by youfuckingslut (man) - United States

Today, my parents told me that they had joined a local club. Proud of them for going out of their comfort zone to make new friends, I googled the name of the club. I'm sure they'll make some lifelong friends at their first swingers club meet. FML

#20179494
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23451) - you deserved it (2550)

On 11/26/2012 at 8:30am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh, City of)

Today, my best friend got engaged to the guy she's been seeing for five years. He also happens to be the man I've been in love with for eight. As she was giving me the details, she nonchalantly gave me her reason for accepting the proposal: "Why the hell not, there's always divorce." FML

#20149647
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23440) - you deserved it (3658)

On 11/05/2012 at 9:48pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)



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