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November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, Muse cancelled their upcoming show in Oslo. I bought my sold-out tickets on the black market for double the retail price, and have no way of getting my money back. FML

#20184120
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10091) - you deserved it (34012)

On 11/29/2012 at 4:12pm - misc - by faen (man) - Norway (Sogn og Fjordane)

Today, my cat was too overweight to get out of the litter box, so he gave up, and went to sleep. I had to pick him up out of his own waste and clean him up. FML

#20175044
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9501) - you deserved it (20318)

On 11/23/2012 at 10:10am - animals - by Jeanna S. - United States

Today, I played paintball with a bunch of friends. By the end of the day, my girlfriend and I were the only people left on the field. She shot me mercilessly, and I screamed like a little girl. 30 people watched, 4 people filmed. FML

#20179414
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9049) - you deserved it (19170)

On 11/26/2012 at 5:26am - misc - by Z (man) - Australia

Today, I put on a shirt that said "skilled in every position." My boyfriend took one look and said, "since when?" FML

#20167475
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8892) - you deserved it (24213)

On 11/18/2012 at 12:05am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was separating my notes into two piles: one to save for exam studying and one to throw out. I finished separating, picked up the junk pile and absentmindedly shredded it. Afterwards, I looked down to see the junk pile still completely intact. Goodbye, passing grades. FML

#20180442
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8847) - you deserved it (23928)

On 11/26/2012 at 10:03pm - work - by shark - United States (Texas)

Today, this guy I've been dating for a few months freaked out and called his mom crying, because I told him I might be pregnant with his baby. He is 27. I didn't even take a pregnancy test yet. FML

#20171052
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8652) - you deserved it (18362)

On 11/20/2012 at 2:45pm - misc - by babyblues (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my mom had a tantrum and screamed at me over my use of bronzer. She called me a selfish bitch and claimed that I'm somehow slowly giving myself skin cancer. FML

#20176711
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8450) - you deserved it (9887)

On 11/24/2012 at 2:38pm - health - by Anonymous Cunt (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house having dinner with her and her parents. I was casually playing footsie with my girlfriend under the table, until her mom stopped eating and said, "You know that's my foot, right?" FML

#20170839
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8331) - you deserved it (24737)

On 11/20/2012 at 10:50am - misc - by Brian (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my family was celebrating my grandma's 90th birthday. I pulled a little prank and got candles that keep relighting. After a few blows, my grandma fainted. FML

#20164153
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8219) - you deserved it (39576)

On 11/15/2012 at 9:54am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I paid a locksmith $100 after I locked myself out of my apartment. All he did was hit it, and it flung open. It wasn't locked, it'd just got stuck. FML

#20153207
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8047) - you deserved it (17722)

On 11/07/2012 at 10:00am - money - by stuck (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, drunk at a party, I leaned through a window to throw up. I was outside. FML

#20182175
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7928) - you deserved it (26335) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 11/28/2012 at 1:20am - health - by kise - Sent from mobile version

Today, after nearly a year of headaches and fuzzy vision, I went to the eye doctor. It turns out I've had my contacts in the wrong eyes for a year. FML

Today, my hair straightener broke. My husband suggested putting electrical tape on it because it was heat proof. I did and started straightening my hair. The supposed heat proof tape melted and got stuck in my hair. FML

#20145539
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7746) - you deserved it (27592)

On 11/03/2012 at 9:50am - misc - by Anonymous - United States



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