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October 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, at work, I got to wait on one of those tables where everyone had very complex orders, and some of them sent their food back. When the time finally came for me to bring them their check and receive my well-earned tip, I returned only to discover that they'd dined and dashed. FML

#20099582
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24392) - you deserved it (1588)

On 10/03/2012 at 4:07am - work - by WaitedOut (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I applied for a job as a secretary. As I sat in the waiting room, the interviewer came out with his wife. She gave me a once-over, then said to her husband, "Hire this one. She's so ugly, you would never have an affair with her." FML

#20109957
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24389) - you deserved it (1580)

On 10/10/2012 at 12:15am - work - by caltech (woman) - United States (California)

Today, the guy I've been madly in love with for ages finally asked me out. I excitedly said yes. I waited a half an hour for him to show up, with another girl and say, "Where's your date?" I was asked to go on a double date, but apparently he forgot to tell me. FML

#20108846
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24313) - you deserved it (1638)

On 10/09/2012 at 8:12am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was talking to my future mother-in-law about my upcoming wedding. She told me that I wasn't allowed to have the wedding at a church, nor wear a white dress, nor have roses for flowers, because that would mean I'd be "copying" her. FML

#20115456
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24274) - you deserved it (1306)

On 10/13/2012 at 7:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend and best friend making out. His explanation was that he was trying to stop her from having an allergic reaction to peanut butter. FML

#20118571
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24270) - you deserved it (1565)

On 10/15/2012 at 8:04pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, my new roommate showed me to my room, which I got a good deal on. I noticed a big black spot on the floor in the walk-in closet. When I asked, he said his last roommate committed suicide and he didn't want to pay to have the carpets professionally cleaned, hence the "good deal." FML

#20113152
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24229) - you deserved it (1694)

On 10/12/2012 at 2:36am - misc - by Dino (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my daughter told me that she wanted to convert to a Christian. Not because she has a strong relation with God, but because she wants to post Facebook statuses about Him and "get a lot of likes." FML

#20131695
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24208) - you deserved it (3082)

On 10/24/2012 at 7:06pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I tried to tell my best friend how wrong she is to be dating a married man, whose wife happens to be pregnant with their first child. Our talk ended with her calling me a "meddling, frigid bitch" and me being told this is why I can't get laid. FML

#20125357
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24156) - you deserved it (2282)

On 10/20/2012 at 2:50pm - misc - by Dillyduzit (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, after much reluctance due to fear of causing a huge debate, I finally posted something on Facebook about the presidential debates. However, the post sparked an argument with my mom's childhood best friend, that ended with her telling me that my dad isn't actually my dad. FML

#20120633
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24146) - you deserved it (2789)

On 10/17/2012 at 2:22am - misc - by bastardchild_01 (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, one of my dad's work friends came over. As he was leaving, he complimented my dad on having three "strapping young boys." I informed him that I'm a girl, and I have a hormone imbalance that causes me to have a lot of hair and a deep voice. I guess my dress didn't give him a clue. FML

#20140430
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24126) - you deserved it (2307)

On 10/30/2012 at 5:26pm - misc - by rarara - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I had to lie to my boyfriend and tell him that the red bumps around my nipples was heat rash, rather than admit it was actually razor burn. FML

#20110590
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24009) - you deserved it (8547)

On 10/10/2012 at 3:07pm - intimacy - by hairynips (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my husband and I found out that our dog was pregnant. He now refuses to have kids with me for at least two years, because he wants to raise the puppies without any "distractions". FML

#20140254
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23976) - you deserved it (3517)

On 10/30/2012 at 2:45pm - animals - by Lilly - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting intimate, and I gave her a condom to put on me. She tried to open it with her teeth, but ripped it. That was my only condom. I'm now sitting here watching a soap opera with a boner. FML

#20129928
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23953) - you deserved it (7667)

On 10/23/2012 at 3:12pm - intimacy - by Andrew - United States



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