Today, I received another death threat for teaching evolution in college. I'm a geology teacher. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18692) - you deserved it (1530)
On 10/18/2012 at 12:58am - work - by satanworshipper - United States (Florida)
Today, I had to buy groceries while suffering horrible morning sickness. My nausea magnified as I stood in line behind an obese lady wearing a tank top and tiny short shorts. I lost everything in my stomach when she stuck her hand down her shorts and started scratching at her ass-crack. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18623) - you deserved it (1270)
On 10/04/2012 at 2:10pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nebraska)
Today, I went to the Natural History Museum with my boyfriend. While we were standing in front of real dinosaur bones, he told me he didn't believe in dinosaurs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18567) - you deserved it (2161)
On 10/23/2012 at 9:19pm - love - by SFra - United States
Today, my husband and I went to marriage counselling. I confessed something that was bothering me, but he didn't understand. Our counselor repeated word-for-word what I said right back at him. He turned to me angrily and shouted, "Why couldn't you just say that the first time?!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (18476) - you deserved it (1926)
On 10/21/2012 at 7:11pm - love - by madari (woman) - Spain (Andalucia)
Today, I got a call from my son's school saying to pick him up because he'd shat his pants. He's in high school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18448) - you deserved it (1728)
On 10/16/2012 at 4:07am - kids - by Mike - United States
Today, I went to the hospital in labor expecting a baby boy. I ended the day with identical twins, a baffled doctor, and a husband convinced that our sons can clone themselves. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18375) - you deserved it (1552)
On 10/29/2012 at 9:30pm - kids - by CutestBoysEver (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, my mom called me an asshole. She was embarrassed when she saw that a visiting family member had overheard, and tried to cover it up with, "Honey, you are a casserole! You are just delicious, any guy is gonna want you sweetie!" She honestly thought this would work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18346) - you deserved it (1222)
On 10/25/2012 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by Agirl (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I had to lie to my boyfriend and tell him that the red bumps around my nipples was heat rash, rather than admit it was actually razor burn. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18344) - you deserved it (7568)
On 10/10/2012 at 3:07pm - intimacy - by hairynips (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was walking in the freezing rain when a guy asked me if I wanted to share his umbrella with him. I grinned and told him I did. He then noticed a pretty girl walking behind me and he abruptly turned to her and asked her the same question. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18323) - you deserved it (1296)
On 10/06/2012 at 11:52am - misc - by FML_Elle - United States
Today, I was at a barbeque with my family, my boyfriend, and some mutual acquaintances. Someone jokingly called my boyfriend a pussy, to which he loudly replied, "I guess I am what I eat!" My mother was sitting across from us. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18292) - you deserved it (2450)
On 10/31/2012 at 4:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, at a family reunion, we all squeezed in for a picture. I set the self-timer and ran to get in it. 2 seconds before the picture went off, some guy came up, stole the camera, and ran away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18264) - you deserved it (1350)
On 10/15/2012 at 3:57pm - money - by Pissed (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my boyfriend and I were making out on his deck out back. When leaving, I heard the sliding glass door open on the upper deck, I froze in the yard to not be seen. Too bad I didn't move. Apparently his dad pees off the deck at night. I had to walk home covered in pee. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18240) - you deserved it (5157)
On 10/12/2012 at 7:11am - health - by monkeyzz (woman) - United States (California)
Today, someone stole the massive pumpkin I've been painstakingly growing all year. What did they do with it? They put it in the middle of a busy intersection. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18236) - you deserved it (1367)
On 10/02/2012 at 2:48pm - misc - by peterpeterpumpkineater (man) - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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