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October 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. When she went to give me a blow job, I got embarrassed and told her I'd rather just please her instead. Now she thinks she's inadequate and I'm being a jerk. FML

#20132312
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24018) - you deserved it (16536)

On 10/25/2012 at 1:45am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I found out that my daughter's "pen pal" is really a 58-year-old man in prison. FML

#20109821
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23959) - you deserved it (2687)

On 10/09/2012 at 10:59pm - kids - by ohgod. - United States (Florida)

Today, I got a coworker at my new job in trouble, because he kept harassing me and asking me out, even after I clearly told him I wasn't interested. Turns out he's very popular around here, and everyone now hates me for being a trouble-maker and not "taking a compliment." FML

#20098400
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23905) - you deserved it (3351)

On 10/02/2012 at 2:27pm - work - by friendlessatwork (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I left the hospital after having knee surgery. While trying to find my balance on my crutches, I was holding onto the roof of the car. My mum slammed the car door shut, not noticing my hand. I can barely even bend my fingers to hold onto my crutches. FML

#20105201
78 comments

Today, while at work being a waitress, I gave my customer his credit card receipt to sign. Instead of giving him a pen, I pulled a tampon out of my apron pocket and handed it to him. FML

#20135099
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23866) - you deserved it (6891)

On 10/27/2012 at 2:42am - work - by geena - United States (Illinois)

Today, for the second day in a row, I was constantly abused, yelled at, insulted, and berated by my wife for "endangering our child's life." I took her to the doctor for a vaccination and flu shot yesterday. FML

#20121390
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23817) - you deserved it (3378)

On 10/17/2012 at 6:58pm - love - by DrugsRX (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went on a field trip with some people from school. I'm currently confined to a wheelchair, so I had to rely on my sister to get around. She eventually went off with her friends, assuming that the people nearby would keep me company. Five minutes later, they'd all left me. FML

#20135712
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23712) - you deserved it (1757)

On 10/27/2012 at 4:04pm - misc - by left4dead (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went to my girlfriend's house to play Twister. Her parents watched us the whole time, making sure we didn't touch. FML

#20100263
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23707) - you deserved it (2230)

On 10/03/2012 at 6:03pm - misc - by its just twister (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went to a big family dinner. I didn't realize I hadn't been invited until we were about to sit down to eat. There were 12 chairs, 12 plates, 12 forks, and 12 glasses. I was the 13th person to arrive. FML

#20141489
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23696) - you deserved it (2299)

On 10/31/2012 at 10:37am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had to eat my breakfast in terrified silence, as my hungover mother staggered into the room, shouted at the kettle for not boiling fast enough, and after a few seconds, screamed that I'd sabotaged it. I'm now grounded for supposedly trying to fuck with her head. FML

#20113953
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23633) - you deserved it (1375)

On 10/12/2012 at 7:00pm - misc - by WTF (woman) - New Zealand (Waikato)

Today, someone stole the massive pumpkin I've been painstakingly growing all year. What did they do with it? They put it in the middle of a busy intersection. FML

#20098412
121 comments

Today, over a family dinner, my husband and I told everyone that I'm pregnant. My father frowned and said, "Again?", my 9-year-old daughter started crying, and her brother smirked and yelled, "Up the ass, no babies!" FML

#20136968
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23553) - you deserved it (5189)

On 10/28/2012 at 12:44pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were making out on his deck out back. When leaving, I heard the sliding glass door open on the upper deck, I froze in the yard to not be seen. Too bad I didn't move. Apparently his dad pees off the deck at night. I had to walk home covered in pee. FML

#20113299
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23480) - you deserved it (6070)

On 10/12/2012 at 7:11am - health - by monkeyzz (woman) - United States (California)



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