Today, I was trolling in a chat room when someone said, quote: "He's just a no-life, unemployed loser still living in his mom's basement. Probably spends all day stroking his tiny dong and fantasizing about having a real girlfriend." I actually started crying because it was so accurate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10359) - you deserved it (34457)
On 04/23/2012 at 6:06pm - misc - by pathetic (man) - Poland (Mazowieckie)
Today, the novelty of shaving a heart into my pubic hair for my wife vanished, when I woke up to find a collection of scabs around my pubes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9901) - you deserved it (8597)
On 04/28/2012 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by Matt (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (9720) - you deserved it (40025) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France
Today, while at work as a cashier, I tried to be sweet and ID an elderly man buying a bottle of wine. He responded by calling me a "blind-ass bitch" and calling my manager for "harassing" him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9639) - you deserved it (16305)
On 04/30/2012 at 5:24am - work - by zomg - United States (Florida)
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, when his sister knocked on the door and asked if she could borrow the zombie movie we were watching after we were done with it. We weren't watching a movie; I was just moaning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9634) - you deserved it (19958)
On 04/04/2012 at 1:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I started my brand new job. I was late because while repairing my favorite pair of high heels, I got superglue in my eye. They had to scrape my cornea and I have to wear an eye patch. I'm now the "new pirate" in the office. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9592) - you deserved it (14095)
On 04/04/2012 at 9:41pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)
Today, I realized my daughter has been in longer relationships than I have. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9464) - you deserved it (12157)
On 04/06/2012 at 11:41pm - love - by Amber C - United States
Today, I found myself humming a Skrillex ditty all day. I'm beginning to wonder if I've had some sort of stroke. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9444) - you deserved it (3297)
On 04/19/2012 at 8:12pm - misc - by WTF? (man) - United States
Today, it was the only time in my life that I have ever received an A+ for something. Thank you, eBay buyer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8839) - you deserved it (10817)
On 04/10/2012 at 10:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (South Australia)
Today, I locked my car. I put the key in my bag when suddenly my car began to roll backwards. I tried to get the key out of my bag but couldn't find it, and with the other hand I tried to stop the car. The worst thing was that some dumbass was watching me and didn't help. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8661) - you deserved it (11235)
On 04/20/2012 at 2:41am - misc - by rabbitoncocaine (woman) - Germany (Thuringen)
Today, I was walking home, when I saw a homeless man trying to tear the wallet out of another guy's hand. I can't stand bums, so I smacked him across the jaw. That's when the other one kneed me in the balls and made off with my wallet as well. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8394) - you deserved it (25959)
On 04/30/2012 at 5:46pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I faked back pain to get out of sex with my wife. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8267) - you deserved it (24596)
On 04/23/2012 at 9:48pm - intimacy - by hjkashld (man) - United States
Today, I went to my first meeting at the university women's group, excited to become a more involved feminist. The first item on the meeting's agenda? The upcoming bake sale. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8137) - you deserved it (19758)
On 04/06/2012 at 12:45am - misc - by feminismlol (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Monday 17 June 2013
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