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Friday 22 May 2015

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my girlfriend of a week showed me her talent: shooting milk out of her vagina across the room. Goodbye dairy products. FML

#21413854
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14985) - you deserved it (1652)

On 05/22/2015 at 2:55am - intimacy - by zzarzzur (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out my mom put breast milk in my cereal until I was 7 years old. FML

#21413959
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14134) - you deserved it (1267)

On 05/22/2015 at 11:17am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had to ask one of my coworkers if we were supposed to return a client's teeth to her. I work at a jewellery store. FML

#21413953
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11303) - you deserved it (905)

On 05/22/2015 at 11:02am - work - by grossedout (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I used a tanning bed for the first time ever, in an attempt to get a base tan for the summer. No one bothered to warn me that you shouldn't go the full ten minutes your first time. Now my skin is as red as my hair. FML

#21413860
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8929) - you deserved it (9954)

On 05/22/2015 at 3:36am - health - by missko519 (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, was my first experience having sex. It was also my first experience with a condom breaking. FML

#21413990
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5958) - you deserved it (622)

On 05/22/2015 at 12:27pm - intimacy - by Vexatious - United States (North Carolina)

Today, and for the past couple of days, my girlfriend's father has been trying to help me think of a way to propose. I decided to rehearse first, and that's how my girlfriend walked in on me "proposing" to her dad. FML

#21413982
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5642) - you deserved it (530)

On 05/22/2015 at 12:08pm - love - by SuchaDisapointment - United States

Today, it was hot out, so I wore shorts. My dad took one look at me and said, "Your thighs are so pale, it's like staring into the sun". FML

#21413979
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4707) - you deserved it (529)

On 05/22/2015 at 11:55am - misc - by xolaurennnn - United States



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Friday 22 May 2015

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