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Thursday 28 August 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my new boyfriend and I got intimate for the first time. He started whispering in my ear, but I couldn't understand him. He pushed me away and ignored me the rest of the night. Apparently it's a huge turn-off that I can't talk dirty in Klingon. FML

#21246884
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21229) - you deserved it (2307)

On 08/28/2014 at 12:34am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while walking to work, I found out what it feels like to be hit in the face by a rolled up newspaper thrown from the window of a moving car by a paper boy doing his rounds. It hit hard enough to give me a black eye. FML

#21246995
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13258) - you deserved it (957)

On 08/28/2014 at 6:31am - work - by newswithabitofbite (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my manager made everyone put up Christmas decorations around the store. As well as this, we're going to have Christmas music playing on repeat all the way through to January. It's not even September yet. FML

#21247337
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (106) - you deserved it (9)

On 08/28/2014 at 6:39pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my demented little sister walked up to me and kicked me between the legs. I told my parents, but they just accusingly asked me what I did to provoke her. When I said "nothing", they accused me of lying. There is no justice. FML

#21247278
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (95) - you deserved it (11)

On 08/28/2014 at 5:16pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Portugal

Today, I went on a date with the world's biggest lightweight. She got blind drunk on wine before dessert, and slurred, "You look like... like a black... blueberry." Amused, I said, "You mean a blackberry?" She stared at me for several long seconds, confused, then passed out. Check please. FML

#21247229
1 comments

I agree, your life sucks (92) - you deserved it (11)

On 08/28/2014 at 3:58pm - love - by wowzer (man) - Puerto Rico



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