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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I threw up in the car. While driving. The good news though, I had a bag to catch it all. Bad news? The bag had a giant hole in the bottom. FML

#15084705
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26292) - you deserved it (3391)

On 02/22/2011 at 10:55pm - health - by CarSick (woman) - United States

Today, I went to a coffee shop with my friend. The guy rang her up and said it was only a dollar as he winked at her $10 purchase. Then he rang me up at completely full price. She got his number and I got to be the ugly friend once again. FML

#19948524
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30476) - you deserved it (3391)

On 07/17/2012 at 2:09am - misc - by theuglyfriend (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my dad still refuses to repay the loan I gave him. I've just barely managed to pay my bills, and I'm now so poor that I'll have to survive the next 3 days until my next paycheck by eating the only thing left in my fridge: a jar of cheese whiz. FML

#21358559
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34426) - you deserved it (3391)

On 02/18/2015 at 12:17pm - money - by janused (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I decided to go all-natural and go to work without any makeup on. My boss swore I was on drugs, which I guess had absolutely nothing to do with the completely "random" drug test I had to take later in the day. FML

#21361118
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33186) - you deserved it (3391)

On 02/22/2015 at 3:36pm - work - by vaylosa (woman) -

Today, my boyfriend asked me to start using a period tracker app so I can tell him which week of each month he needs to "stay the hell away" from me. FML

#21455940
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20983) - you deserved it (3391)

On 08/14/2015 at 9:19am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, my girlfriend was really depressed. I listed the top 50 reasons why I love her. Her response was "thanks for that but seriously, this video on youtube is hilarious." I couldn't cheer her up but apparently a 10 second video of a dog running in circles can. FML

#8238401
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28898) - you deserved it (3390)

On 02/14/2010 at 3:48am - love - by Samson (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, is the first weekend I have off this summer. Instead of letting me see my friends, my dad printed out a practice SAT exam. I've already taken the SAT. He just "doesn't want me to get rusty". FML

#11312975
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34128) - you deserved it (3390)

On 06/19/2010 at 2:53pm - misc - by Classicmen - United States (Maryland)

Today, in an amphitheater, someone hit the back of my head. As I turned around, the guy apologized and said he mistook me for his friend. I changed seats, and after a while, I got hit a second time. He was wrong again. FML

#17159323
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29350) - you deserved it (3390)

On 07/18/2011 at 3:09am - misc - by fthislyfe (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, I realized I have to choose between being unemployed or putting up with my perverted boss who desperately wants me. I'm a guy and so is he. FML

#18201321
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41478) - you deserved it (3390)

On 11/09/2011 at 12:20pm - work - by Anonymous - Romania (Mures)

Today, I went on my fifth date with my new girlfriend. Apparently, she was in such a rush while leaving work that she forgot to take off her wedding ring. FML

#20567033
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47323) - you deserved it (3390)

On 03/30/2013 at 3:02pm - love - by unknown - France

Today, I discovered that one of our cats is super creepy. He humps the blankets on my mother's bed while staring at her while she's sleeping. FML

#21257305
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38634) - you deserved it (3390)

On 09/13/2014 at 2:56am - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I'm studying abroad in Russia, and I lost my keys to my dorm room. In the office I asked for a spare and she spoke really fast so I couldn't hear her. Assuming I don't speak Russian, she gets on the phone and calls maintenance saying, "There is this ugly girl about to cry... come fix it." FML

#3635779
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50644) - you deserved it (3389)

On 07/10/2009 at 8:50am - misc - by icanunderstand (woman) - Russian Federation (Saint Petersburg City)

Today, I received my first Valentine's day present ever: a dead mouse from my cat. FML

#8241571
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22384) - you deserved it (3389)

On 02/14/2010 at 8:24am - animals - by lex31 - United States



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