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Today, I was at Walmart. A guy in a mobility scooter bumped into me, then told me to "get the fuck out of the way." When I told him to watch his mouth, he got up and shoved me into a shelf. Just a few minutes prior, he'd yelled that he was paralyzed from the waist down. FML

#20797503
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47869) - you deserved it (3237)

On 07/22/2013 at 12:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, the "man cold" has infected my brother. He honestly thinks he's dying. He only has the sniffles. FML

#20982595
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34601) - you deserved it (3237)

On 12/06/2013 at 7:21am - health - by linzl00 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, it was safe to say I started sleepwalking again, after I woke up with a mouth filled with soil and a ravaged plant. FML

#20995711
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36717) - you deserved it (3237)

On 12/17/2013 at 10:38am - health - by adventurousnightsbutnotinagoodway (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, my mom went snooping through my art bin to "clean out my old drawings". She found numerous nude pieces and accused me of selling porn. My mom mistook and threw out 57 anatomy practice sketches that I worked very very hard on, and ripped up the remainder of my drawings. FML

#4391923
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52552) - you deserved it (3236)

On 08/08/2009 at 8:02pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend came over to have dinner with my family. Everything went well until my mum started hitting the brandy. While kicked back in her chair, she asked my boyfriend how satisfactory I was in bed, and if he enjoyed going down on me. FML

#14742735
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33554) - you deserved it (3236)

On 01/28/2011 at 12:23pm - intimacy - by bittenbyadonkey (woman) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, I found Jesus. The bad news, he was in the form of a concrete statue falling on my car. FML

#18316439
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34279) - you deserved it (3236)

On 11/22/2011 at 12:18pm - misc - by religionbites621 - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I came home from work to find white fabric and crystals all over the apartment floor. I followed the trail of destruction to my bedroom, where my roommate had left our closet door open. Apparently, her cats decided that my wedding gown was to be their newest conquest. FML

#20762512
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49205) - you deserved it (3236)

On 07/03/2013 at 10:40pm - animals - by nakedweddingday (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me via Twitter. FML

#21295236
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33235) - you deserved it (3236)

On 11/09/2014 at 3:37am - love - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my girlfriend decided it would be a funny idea to spray me with a hose while I was holding a kitten, showing her how cute we were. Needless to say, now I'm covered head to toe in cat scratches. FML

#7870417
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23903) - you deserved it (3235)

On 02/04/2010 at 3:40am - health - by littlespoon (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I found out that the acne under my arms was worse then the severe acne on my face. FML

#8557720
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25505) - you deserved it (3235)

On 02/22/2010 at 4:43pm - health - by baconrash - United States (New York)

Today, to avoid a massive delay on our scheduled flight at the airport, we were generously moved to an earlier flight home. An hour later, our new flight had been cancelled and they told us we'd be stuck at the airport overnight. Our original flight took off fine. FML

#20527906
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32176) - you deserved it (3235)

On 03/02/2013 at 9:14am - misc - by melyeah - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, a coworker at school yelled at one of our students to be quiet. The kid got pretty upset, so I went to comfort him. He held my hand for the rest of the class, telling me in vivid detail how he was going to kill my coworker. Now I'm afraid to look at him. FML

#20903281
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39903) - you deserved it (3235)

On 10/01/2013 at 12:36pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I'm studying abroad in Russia, and I lost my keys to my dorm room. In the office I asked for a spare and she spoke really fast so I couldn't hear her. Assuming I don't speak Russian, she gets on the phone and calls maintenance saying, "There is this ugly girl about to cry... come fix it." FML

#3635779
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48706) - you deserved it (3234)

On 07/10/2009 at 8:50am - misc - by icanunderstand (woman) - Russian Federation (Saint Petersburg City)



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