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Today, I finally got my hands on the new iPhone 5, after I pulled it out of a patient's rectum. FML

#20098468
393 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31364) - you deserved it (2396)

On 10/02/2012 at 3:39pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, and throughout the past week, my electricity, water, cable, and Internet were progressively shut off. Why? Because my deranged mother-in-law has been stealing the money orders I use to pay my bills out of my mailbox. She also stole the late notices because she didn't want me to be "mad". FML

#20678301
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41895) - you deserved it (2396)

On 05/21/2013 at 6:47pm - money - by LightsOut - United States (Florida)

Today, I finally made the last payment on the beautiful engagement ring I bought and proposed with - two years ago. To my ex-girlfriend, who said no and promptly started sleeping with one of my friends. FML

#18940800
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28723) - you deserved it (2395)

On 01/29/2012 at 4:55am - love - by brokeandsingle - United Kingdom (York)

Today, I was in a mall bathroom when two girls started making out in the stall next to me. Before I could leave, they got really into it and caused our shared wall to tear from its hinges and collapse on top of me. FML

#20067220
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31346) - you deserved it (2395)

On 09/11/2012 at 3:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was using the bathroom at McDonald's when my wallet fell out of my pocket. A lady reached into my stall and tried to grab it. FML

Today, my best friend thought it would be funny push me off my bike. He thought it was even funnier when the paramedic accidentally dropped me. FML

#4983911
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40104) - you deserved it (2394)

On 09/01/2009 at 8:04pm - health - by Misterhippo (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was playing basketball in our company gym. I took a shot from half court, and at that exact moment, an executive walked into the gym with an important potential client. My shot bounced off the side of the backboard, off some bleachers, and right into the client's head. FML

#13263199
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19256) - you deserved it (2394)

On 09/30/2010 at 1:13pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I started my new job at a security company. In the first 15 minutes there was a bomb threat. FML

#18329214
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24857) - you deserved it (2394)

On 11/23/2011 at 5:53pm - work - by anon -

Today, I just found out my dad got remarried a year ago. The woman is officially living with us, I got to have lunch with her alone today. I found out she is only 22, with a 14 year old little brother. My dad's 47. I'm 17, now with a 14 year old uncle and a mom that can pass for my girlfriend. FML

#4126370
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49720) - you deserved it (2393)

On 07/29/2009 at 2:22am - misc - by Beefballs (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my brother's home for his annual visit, lectures my parents once about their eating habits. They promptly throw away all of their junk food. I'm there every Sunday, and have been telling them to eat healthier for medical reasons. They never listen. He's in sales, and I'm in med school. FML

#8195663
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20115) - you deserved it (2393)

On 02/13/2010 at 3:47am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend, who lives 100 miles away and whom I haven't seen in 2 months, told me he was visiting my city with some friends. I assumed this was an opening to an invitation, but no, he just asked me about the best places to get drunk. FML

#20013231
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16906) - you deserved it (2393)

On 08/10/2012 at 8:57am - misc - by blink_kid - United Kingdom (West Lothian)

Today, I received a lovely letter from the council telling me I have to cease the act of "breeding and selling cats" because someone from my Facebook reported me. I'm pretty sure I've never owned a cat or had one in my house. FML

#20764172
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37776) - you deserved it (2393)

On 07/04/2013 at 10:26pm - misc - by suspicious (woman) - United States

Today, I was mentioning to a coworker how there was a huge lull today in business. A young coworker then turns to me and says in a snooty tone, "I think you mean a 'lol', it's pronounced L-O-L." FML

#20953649
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40360) - you deserved it (2393)

On 11/11/2013 at 5:36am - work - by shut up. - New Zealand



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