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Today, the girl I really liked started talking to me, so I asked her out on a date. After waiting an hour at the theatre, I texted her asking where she was. She replied with, "Oh! You were serious about the date?!" FML

#14621087
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35731) - you deserved it (3222)

On 01/18/2011 at 12:05am - love - by MCKilllerrr - United States (Texas)

Today, my new dog unburied my old dog and chewed on his bones. FML

#19520416
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44548) - you deserved it (3222)

On 04/24/2012 at 1:42am - animals - by jessica071509 - United States (Arizona)

Today, I woke up at 3:00 am feeling freezing cold and soaking wet. It turns out that my dad had opened my window when I was sleeping, and rain water had been pouring in on me all night. My hair, face, pillow, blankets, alarm clock, and homework were all soaked as well. FML

#20722563
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46719) - you deserved it (3222)

On 06/12/2013 at 10:40pm - misc - by Anon - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while bagging my groceries at a store, a lady came over to me, took a good look at the food I'd bought, picked out an item and put it in her bag. When I confronted her, she called security on me and told them I wanted to steal her stuff. I got thrown out and she walked away with a smirk. FML

#20736762
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49731) - you deserved it (3222)

On 06/20/2013 at 4:35am - money - by what_the_hell (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, I had a family get-together for my birthday. I got to watch all my family members get piss-drunk and argue over who's having the worst time. FML

#20971273
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38528) - you deserved it (3222)

On 11/26/2013 at 11:43am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I witnessed my husband in the shower singing Chicago's "You're the Inspiration" to his penis while manscaping. I guess that's a bond we'll never have. FML

#21342844
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26749) - you deserved it (3222)

On 01/23/2015 at 11:46am - intimacy - by LD - United States (Idaho)

Today, after my first flight landed late, I burned out my lungs sprinting full speed for 10 minutes to catch my next flight. The gate number on my ticket was wrong. It had been changed to one right next to where I had originally pulled up to. FML

#8501700
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25036) - you deserved it (3221)

On 02/21/2010 at 12:47am - misc - by mad flyer - Sent from mobile version

Today, I finally found the perfect quote to open my college essay. Then I found out that the author was one of the founders of the KKK. FML

#20080326
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12846) - you deserved it (3221)

On 09/20/2012 at 2:10am - work - by Albert (man) - United States

Today, my room mate told all of our mutual friends that he had walked in on me doing woodwork in my room. They all thought he meant he had caught me rubbing one out. I'm actually building a guitar. FML

#20883989
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46078) - you deserved it (3221)

On 09/16/2013 at 5:11pm - intimacy - by I have wood (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, a guy punched me in the subway for staring at his girlfriend. I had dark glasses on, and was fast asleep. FML

#21002133
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42993) - you deserved it (3221)

On 12/23/2013 at 3:24am - misc - by GogglesGoggles - United States

Today, I went to a huge rock concert. While waiting in a half a mile long line to get in, I passed out due to the heat. I regained consciousness to hear about a hundred people yelling and trying to help me. My boyfriend, who I went with, was not one of them. FML

#4193534
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42739) - you deserved it (3220)

On 07/31/2009 at 10:35pm - health - by passedoutpolly (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to the Salvation Army to donate some clothes. As I was handing over the 4 huge bags that I had carried for 10 blocks, while 6 months pregnant, somebody stole my purse. FML

#14211022
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38293) - you deserved it (3220)

On 12/15/2010 at 6:58am - misc - by mugged (woman) - Germany (Hessen)

Today, I threw up when I woke up, feeling quite ill, I told my mum. She instantly thought I was pregnant. I'm still a virgin and she doesn't believe me. FML

#15229346
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33816) - you deserved it (3220)

On 03/07/2011 at 1:17pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Stoke-on-Trent)



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