Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I'm getting kicked out of my flat because my drunk friends stole a pony and left it tied outside. FML

#17669700
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25912) - you deserved it (2992)

On 09/05/2011 at 11:03am - misc - by thefrightening1 (woman) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, my cat vomited violently. I can smell it but I can't find it. FML

#18520750
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29197) - you deserved it (2992)

On 12/15/2011 at 4:49pm - animals - by Anonymous - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I was eating a fancy dinner with my girlfriend at a restaurant. Suddenly, my ex-girlfriend, who was seemingly still angry after our breakup 2 years ago, saw me through the window. She walked in, took my spaghetti dinner, shoved it in my face, and stormed out. FML

#20148447
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25197) - you deserved it (2992)

On 11/05/2012 at 2:02am - love - by sad (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I finally unfriended my roommate's mom on Facebook after months of her commenting on my wall multiple times a day and basically stalking me. After discovering this, she drove to our apartment to demand through hysterical tears that my roommate move out because I can't be trusted. FML

Today, I was on the bus, heading to work, when the girl beside me started yelling at me, claiming I was staring down her shirt. I did no such thing, but the driver nonetheless stopped the bus and made me get off, all under the withering glares of the other passengers. FML

#20907593
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41394) - you deserved it (2992)

On 10/04/2013 at 8:04pm - misc - by ricky the sage (man) - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, while out for dinner with my parents, a woman, approximately the same age as my mother, repeatedly propositioned me for sex during the course of my meal. After declining firmly several times, she only stopped after my mother convinced her I was gay. FML

#21279658
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34284) - you deserved it (2992)

On 10/17/2014 at 6:13am - intimacy - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I spent all day organizing a list of electronic parts for my boss. I found the easiest way was to color problem parts in the spreadsheet red and okay parts green. After I finished at the end of the day, I found out my boss is red-green colorblind. FML

#7297645
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26618) - you deserved it (2991)

On 01/12/2010 at 10:08am - work - by Colormered - France

Today, my "friend" thought it'd be absolutely hilarious to use my phone to text my girlfriend, bragging that I'd found a new "slampiece" and that she's "fukcin dumpd". Now I'm single, her dad keeps making threatening calls to me, and nobody will even listen to my side of the story. FML

#20175626
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26255) - you deserved it (2991)

On 11/23/2012 at 7:38pm - love - by jakeson12 - United Kingdom (Dundee City)

Today, I got a call at 4 in the morning from the security company, saying someone had broken into my workplace. I drove an hour out there, only to find out it was a rat that had set off the alarm. FML

#21000984
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38897) - you deserved it (2991)

On 12/22/2013 at 1:56am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, it was my grandfather's burial. As the family was about to leave, a great aunt came up to my skinny, tall and pretty cousin and told her, "Stay beautiful and kind." Then, she walked to me and said, "And you, Stay kind." FML

#5942198
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31353) - you deserved it (2990)

On 10/22/2009 at 8:26am - misc - by kthx (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I slid on ice and hit another car while driving to work. My car was totalled, and my leg hurt, while the other car had very little damage. Not two minutes later, the salt truck drove by, spraying the road. FML

#7275776
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22360) - you deserved it (2990)

On 01/11/2010 at 8:43am - misc - by wrecked (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out that my best friend's mom doesn't wear pyjamas when I got up to go get a glass of water in the middle of the night, at the same time she did. FML

#13204621
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23029) - you deserved it (2990)

On 09/26/2010 at 1:45am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Dakota)

Today, my dad and I were in the car when a rabbit scurried across the road, just missing us. My dad turned and said to me, "Well, it's good we didn't hit him. He gets to live another day." I then looked in the rear view mirror to see the rabbit running away from the cross traffic, only to be hit by the car behind us. FML

#9102050
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21724) - you deserved it (2990)

On 03/15/2010 at 12:44pm - misc - by bunnylover (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: