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Today, I checked the app I had used during the night. It's supposed to record you while you sleep if you make any noise, and I had downloaded because my friends say I snore. The only noise it picked up was my parents having sex. FML

#19979186
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36570) - you deserved it (3631)

On 07/23/2012 at 4:08am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Wyoming)

Today, my crazy ex-girlfriend legally changed her last name to mine. I'm getting married in a week. FML

#20986172
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54862) - you deserved it (3631)

On 12/09/2013 at 10:10am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that I am "un-promotable" to the job that I have been promised for the last two years because, I "don't suffer idiots well." Idiots. FML

Today, I was robbed of five bucks by a vending machine that said "Enjoy Life!" FML

#13220613
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26244) - you deserved it (3630)

On 09/27/2010 at 9:09am - misc - by lovelife - United States

Today, while arguing with my newly ex-girlfriend over how she cheated on me with a mutual friend, she tried to wash her hands of any guilt, saying that I was "selfish" and "just slut-shaming, really". FML

#20796093
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45267) - you deserved it (3630)

On 07/21/2013 at 5:49pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my new deodorant caused an allergic reaction, covering my armpits in a painful rash. I've had to awkwardly waddle around all day with my arms splayed outwards to get any relief. One customer at work sarcastically mentioned that it's nice that they're hiring penguins these days. FML

#20909610
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42737) - you deserved it (3630)

On 10/06/2013 at 1:40pm - health - by _/ | \_ (woman) - Singapore

Today, I had to wake up at 4am because my boss set an important business meeting for first thing in the morning. After making sure everything was ready, I went to work. My boss ended up oversleeping and moved the meeting to tomorrow. FML

Today, I was taking the subway to school. It was around 6:30am and I was listening to music and catching up on homework. When I took my headphones off to readjust them, I heard some grunting. I looked over at the man across from me to see he was masturbating. FML

#256186
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72163) - you deserved it (3629)

On 03/09/2009 at 10:04pm - intimacy - by danesy - United States (New York)

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend because I found an email he had written to an ex-fling telling her he was single and wanted to meet up. He wrote that email from my computer, in my apartment, on Valentine's Day. FML

#197366
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77728) - you deserved it (3630)

On 03/03/2009 at 5:07pm - love - by JTo (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my family and I went on a picnic in the park 45 minutes drive away from our house. I fell asleep beneath a tree. They left me there. FML

#5645796
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40953) - you deserved it (3629)

On 10/04/2009 at 5:33pm - misc - by walker (man) - United States (California)

Today, I heard my parents having sex. It wouldn't have been so bad if we weren't in the same hotel room. They thought I was asleep. FML

#12474079
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47338) - you deserved it (3629)

On 08/12/2010 at 8:02am - intimacy - by ScarredEars - United States

Today, four hours before a test, I received an email from my professor saying that the test had been canceled. When I checked my email again before bed, I found another email from my professor saying that his email had been hacked and the test was was still on. FML

#15680031
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41350) - you deserved it (3629)

On 04/07/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Puerto Rico)

Today, I convinced my best friend to talk to the guy I like at work to find out if he was interested in me. She came back ten minutes later, and told me he said he'd never be able to date me. Apparently, kissing me "would be like making out with Mother Teresa's corpse." FML

#18084228
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28428) - you deserved it (3629)

On 10/26/2011 at 9:38pm - love - by nekogirl15 (woman) - United States (Colorado)



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