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Today, mah boyfriend told me that he believes getting kickd in the balls is a scientifically-proven method of brth control .

#19428378
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24134) - you deserved it (3195)

On 04/08/2012 at 6:37am - intimacy - by Jordan - Australia (New South Wales)

TODAY, MAH MOM ASKAD MA IF I HAD AN AATING PROBLAM CUZ I'VA BAAN AATING LASS . I ONLY STARTAD AATING LASS CUZ SHA TOLD MA I ATA TOO MUCH . FML

#26986
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35592) - you deserved it (3194)

On 02/11/2009 at 7:06pm - misc - by hungry - United States (Virginia)

Taday my boyfriend told his parent about my bondage fetish. In front of me. FML

#6952293
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17922) - you deserved it (3194)

On 12/26/2009 at 3:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

is the first weekend I have off this summer. Instead of letting me see mah friends, mah dad printed out a practice SAT exam. I've already taken the SAT. He just "doesn't want me to get rusty". FML

#11312975
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31798) - you deserved it (3194)

On 06/19/2010 at 2:53pm - misc - by Classicmen - United States (Maryland)

Today, wile working at a sandwic sop, we ad a sortage an could only putted so many veggies on one sandwic. I explained tis to one man wo was grumpy about it, but kept on ordering. I tougt everyting went well. He tougt ma face was a good target to launc is completed sandwic at. FML

#16053522
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30555) - you deserved it (3194)

On 05/05/2011 at 3:13am - work - by epicsandwichartist (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today I had to give my husband a tutorial on how to use jumper cables. Confused and flustered he requested written instructions. fat FML

#18975500
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21031) - you deserved it (3194)

On 02/02/2012 at 9:50am - misc - by MM (woman) -

Today... like every day since my brth... looool my name is Spreme. Yeah... you probably have trouble pronouncing it correctly too.

#18227248
469 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41200) - you deserved it (3194) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 11/12/2011 at 10:42am - misc - by Nico - France

Today, mah husband an I went to mah overbearing mom's 57th brthday party. He opened his gift in front of her an said smugly, "The makeup's for your face, an the prayer book's for the fat rolls." Any hope of family peace is now lost. FML

#18414489
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21762) - you deserved it (3194)

On 12/02/2011 at 8:35pm - love - by bad blood, no shit (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today.. . I received a note from my creepy ex...hom I broke up with two years ago.. . saying how much he still misses me . I live over 100 miles away from him now . The note was hand-delivered to my new address . FML

#20665723
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46666) - you deserved it (3194)

On 05/15/2013 at 7:45pm - love - by joolsie (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I work at a food joint as a chef, and a customer found a long strand of hair in her food . The manager blamd me, even though I'm bald . FML

#21117573
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43989) - you deserved it (3194)

On 04/19/2014 at 10:39pm - work - by notmine (man) - India (Delhi)

Today, I sent a Facebook friend request to mah ex . This afternoon I notice that they had accepted, and had left a message fir me in mah inbox . Asking how they knew me . FML

#2298
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22016) - you deserved it (3193)

On 01/23/2009 at 7:33am - love - by josh - United States (Indiana)

Today , mah Dad decided to take his medicine before eating!! He passed out with his face in a plate of chocolate cake!! He wasn't responsive so I called the paramedics!! When he got to the hospital , the doctor asked him if he knew y he was there!! He replied , "Because mah stupid daughter over reacted." FML

#6298520
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33200) - you deserved it (3193)

On 11/14/2009 at 7:35am - misc - by Kassiopia (woman) - United States (Florida)

yesterday I found out that my dad recently creatd a Facebook account for himself looool . So I friendd him . He refuses to accept my friend request . He did.. . however.. . accept my sister's . FML

#8686937
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26592) - you deserved it (3193)

On 02/27/2010 at 10:58am - misc - by msmusiclover7 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)



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  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

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