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Today, my friend showed off her new tattoo, which is supposed to say "bad bitch" in Italian, and I had to point out that it actually says "defective female". Her response was to cuss me out and inform me that I'm no longer part of her social circle. FML

#19824729
279 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26759) - you deserved it (3081)

On 06/21/2012 at 4:28pm - misc - by tubby (woman) - Sweden (Blekinge Lan)

Today, I got an email from a Scholarship Program reminding me that they had rejected me 3 months ago. Thanks for reminding me I might not make it to college. FML

#3772317
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44452) - you deserved it (3080)

On 07/15/2009 at 12:02pm - money - by nsJ (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my best friend had set me up on a blind date. The guy demonstrated at length that he could do different cartoon voices such as Donald Duck, Droopy and many others the entire time. Oh, and he also kept wanting to talk about his farts. FML

#8529668
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24366) - you deserved it (3080)

On 02/21/2010 at 9:12pm - love - by Court - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me with a voice card. It said "Marry me Amber?" I'm not Amber. That's his ex. FML

Today, I'm a nanny. After the kids went to bed the dog wouldn't stop barking violently unless I held the end of a blanket for him to hump. I need a raise. FML

#16738818
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31562) - you deserved it (3080)

On 06/19/2011 at 1:19am - work - by fattymcbutterpants - United States

Today, my mother came back from her trip to Vegas. Her breasts were obviously 2 letter sizes larger. I asked if she got a boob job and she denied it, saying that it's against her religion. She's an atheist, and a liar. FML

#20460160
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33737) - you deserved it (3080)

On 01/15/2013 at 12:45am - misc - by Brooke - United States (California)

Today, my landlord started showing my apartment, where I have lived and paid rent for over 2 years, to prospective tenants. I didn't realize that I was moving. FML

#21120676
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42468) - you deserved it (3080)

On 04/23/2014 at 8:43am - misc - by Almost_Homeless - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was on a date with someone I've had a crush on for a long time. It was after midnight, we were chatting in the car and I was close to having my first kiss ever. That is, until a bunch of policemen popped up to arrest my date for being a suspected drug dealer. FML

#8651104
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29516) - you deserved it (3079)

On 02/25/2010 at 10:05pm - love - by ifaisal - Qatar (Ad Dawhah)

Today, I told my father I registered for the Marines, and that I'm leaving for bootcamp next week. He asked if this means that he doesn't have to pay child support anymore. FML

#12401273
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28158) - you deserved it (3079)

On 08/09/2010 at 12:03am - misc - by Widowmaker - Sent from mobile version

Today, after being laid off for over a year, I got turned down for an unpaid internship. I can't even get people to let me work for free. FML

#16561616
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29153) - you deserved it (3079)

On 06/08/2011 at 12:10pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while spending the night at a friend's house, I was woken up by someone kicking me. I figured she was having a nightmare, and since we were sharing a bed, I reached over to wake her up. Turns out it was her boyfriend trying to push me off the bed because they were having sex. FML

#18807759
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39746) - you deserved it (3079)

On 01/14/2012 at 6:40pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was talking to my tattoo artist about how my girlfriend broke up with me. She had also gotten her tattoos from him, so they had talked quite a bit. He told me she had been cheating on me with her ex for two and a half months. He didn't tell me because he didn't want to lose business. FML

#12959841
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28675) - you deserved it (3078)

On 09/08/2010 at 4:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, both of the roads leading to my small town were washed out by rising flood waters. I now live on an island in the middle of Wyoming. FML

#16357497
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32862) - you deserved it (3078)

On 05/26/2011 at 1:54pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Wyoming)



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