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Today, I went to the allergist. I found out that I am allergic to dogs, cats, wool, fleece, and pet dander. I'm currently planning to go to school to become a veterinarian. FML

#6054413
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35838) - you deserved it (3144)

On 10/29/2009 at 12:36pm - work - by KMack (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, 60 guests for my wedding were supposed to arrive to the Bahamas. The first and only hurricane of the season decided to crash my wedding, stranding my mom, maid of honor and best man. No one will be able to attend my wedding, except the other drunken hotel guests. FML

#20133630
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20628) - you deserved it (3144)

On 10/25/2012 at 11:58pm - misc - by sadbride - Bahamas (New Providence)

Today, I was dumped by my girlfriend due to our long distance relationship. She then agreed to date my best friend who lives in the same town as me. FML

#12447097
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34965) - you deserved it (3143)

On 08/11/2010 at 2:50am - love - by sadface - United States

Today, a guy professed his love for me in front of my friends. The guy is my first cousin. FML

#20414731
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38771) - you deserved it (3143)

On 12/22/2012 at 9:33pm - love - by Brittany (woman) - United States

Today, I was shopping for a new deodorant, and this guy was standing in the way. He wouldn't move, so I crouched down to get the one I wanted, right when he did the most violent fart right in my face. Then his wife came over, made a face and he whispered, "I think that girl just farted". FML

#21290313
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35485) - you deserved it (3143)

On 11/02/2014 at 6:28am - health - by smellyhair - United Kingdom

Today, after months of trying, my wife of seven years told me she is finally pregnant. I'm going to be an uncle. FML

#7189298
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63097) - you deserved it (3142)

On 01/06/2010 at 10:17pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was getting frisky with my fiancée when she started talking about her dead great-grandma. FML

#13415176
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23161) - you deserved it (3142)

On 10/12/2010 at 12:48am - intimacy - by tdiz - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my distraught mom called me, saying my dad had killed himself and to come home right away. After cussing out my math teacher for trying to stop me and rushing back home in a taxi, I ran into the living room, only to find my parents laughing so hard they were practically in tears. FML

#18758727
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65399) - you deserved it (3142)

On 01/09/2012 at 6:01pm - misc - by fuckparents (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I saw my cat playing with one of his many toy mice. Knowing he likes to play fetch, I picked it up and threw it across the room. Upon trying to pick it up a second time, I realized that not only was it not a toy, but it was only half-dead. FML

#20174725
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22802) - you deserved it (3143)

On 11/23/2012 at 1:17am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I came across a tourist in the street asking people for directions, but nobody understood him. I speak English, so I went to help the gentleman out. He said "Knock it off with the cheesy accent, pal" and informed me that my country is a shithole. FML

#20991671
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39840) - you deserved it (3142)

On 12/13/2013 at 5:20pm - misc - by thank u usa (man) - Germany

Today, I walked in on my girlfriend cheating on me. The guy turned around and said, "Sorry, I borrowed your condoms." FML

#21283288
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42426) - you deserved it (3142)

On 10/22/2014 at 6:38pm - intimacy - by BadLuckLad (man) - United Kingdom (Portsmouth)

Today, one of my really close friends changed from being 'free' to 'quite busy' in the space of one conversation because I suggested that we hang out. FML

#15870197
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25601) - you deserved it (3141)

On 04/21/2011 at 4:33am - misc - by gutted (woman) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I found out that my father has taken my copy of Modern Warfare 3, and re-wrapped it as a Christmas present. FML

#18569912
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26250) - you deserved it (3141)

On 12/21/2011 at 12:39pm - misc - by tacoboy27 - United States (California)



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  • Oi! Stop "playing" that digeridoo and get out! There, now that I've tidied up my apartment, we can begin. How are you all doing? Have you got your leather jacket out of storage to go hang out down at…

Thursday 22 January 2015

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