Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I went to my dad's house for Christmas. Soon enough, my grandma had commented on how much weight I've gained, my aunt asked me why I'm still single, and my dad joined in by reminding me that I still haven't been accepted into college. Only three more days to go. FML

#21004056
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35351) - you deserved it (3227)

On 12/24/2013 at 8:12pm - misc - by holiday from hell - United States (New York)

Today, I just got back from a two week vacation. I live with six people and only the dog was happy to see me. FML

#21252441
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33242) - you deserved it (3227)

On 09/05/2014 at 2:54pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I realized that I can still do the splits. Why? Because I fell down an entire flight of stairs, everyone in the hall saw me land and applauded. Someone even shouted "and she sticks the landing." FML

#8965492
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22857) - you deserved it (3226)

On 03/10/2010 at 3:09am - misc - by misty_love (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I was at Wal-Mart walking around when I slipped on some water and twisted my ankle. As I was getting up, a man comes up to me and said "There's some water on the floor, watch out." FML

#17770342
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26639) - you deserved it (3226)

On 09/18/2011 at 5:20am - misc - by yeahhhhhommmie (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got a date for Valentine's Day. The date is with my orthodontist; he's going to tighten my braces. FML

#18984766
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22608) - you deserved it (3226)

On 02/03/2012 at 3:47pm - misc - by tooembarassed - United States

Today, my girlfriend of nine months made a huge scene in public, calling me a "cheating bastard" because she saw me with another woman at the library. That "other woman" is my Calculus tutor. FML

#20514871
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32538) - you deserved it (3226)

On 02/20/2013 at 1:20pm - love - by ? - United States (California)

Today, my uncle gave me a very expensive bottle of champagne at a celebratory family event. We were celebrating me spending 1 year sober. FML

#20951207
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45288) - you deserved it (3226)

On 11/09/2013 at 8:20am - misc - by Falling off the wagon - United Kingdom (Brighton and Hove)

Today, I witnessed my psycho neighbor put her cat in a cage, cross into my backyard, and set the cage down before returning to her house. She then called the cops and claimed I'd stolen her cat. The cops didn't believe my side of the story for a second. FML

#21106030
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47045) - you deserved it (3226)

On 04/06/2014 at 3:37pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I was in a good mood for once and my professor looks at me and says, "I don't know what you ate for breakfast but you're really annoying today." FML

#21305482
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28545) - you deserved it (3226)

On 11/24/2014 at 10:25pm - work - by anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was driving home through the middle of nowhere when a screw punctured my car tire. I arrived at the town's only auto shop to find that it had closed early. Frantic, I dialed the emergency number listed on the shop's locked door. On the other side of the glass, a phone began to ring. FML

#3579421
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49135) - you deserved it (3225)

On 07/08/2009 at 11:24am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I got suspended for bringing a "hazardous weapon" to school. They were earrings. FML

#17584476
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30308) - you deserved it (3225)

On 08/26/2011 at 8:03am - misc - by christine brown - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my boyfriend told me to text him when I got home to let him know I'd made it home safe. He said if I didn't, he'd assume that aliens had abducted me and that he'd get a new girlfriend. He was completely serious. FML

#20070673
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18378) - you deserved it (3225)

On 09/13/2012 at 7:38pm - love - by TaffyMichele (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got a message from my teacher about my homework. We were supposed to write an original myth explaining a natural event. My teacher bumped my grade for it down to a C for copying a myth that already exists. My myth was based on an original story I've been writing for two years. FML

#20869277
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37785) - you deserved it (3225)

On 09/05/2013 at 7:27pm - misc - by WritesTooWell - United States (Florida)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: