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Today, I went to my "not so technologically advanced" grandma's house to help her out with her computer. It appears she has very interesting conversations with the man who lives in the apartment above her. FML

#15061511
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31315) - you deserved it (3678)

On 02/21/2011 at 2:46am - intimacy - by Josie (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years confessed that he was sleeping with me and 5 other girls while we first started dating. He told me he numbered us and rolled a die to see which one he would date. I guess I won. FML

#6775724
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37546) - you deserved it (3677)

On 12/16/2009 at 7:09am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my three-year-old decided to dump the entire contents of her cereal box onto the kitchen floor because she was looking for a "prize." The only prize we found was a huge dead cockroach, which she promptly stuck in her mouth. FML

#6013490
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36342) - you deserved it (3677)

On 10/26/2009 at 8:42pm - kids - by laxie (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went bowling with my friends. As I was about to take my turn, my friend came up behind me and yelled in my ear, "Don't mess up!" Startled, I dropped the ball on my foot. FML

#8448273
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23962) - you deserved it (3677)

On 02/19/2010 at 5:00pm - health - by lexiiiiiiweee - United States

Today, I fell going down the stairs to the subway platform during rush hour. Someone was kind enough to help me up and someone else was kind enough to steal my iPhone which had fallen out of my pocket and landed nearby. FML

#15581921
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35576) - you deserved it (3677)

On 03/31/2011 at 10:42pm - money - by blegh - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my little brother told me to give him my phone so he could play a game on it. I said no, because I was taking a call from a friend at the time. He then walked over to the wall, headbutted it, burst into tears, then told my parents that I punched him. They believed him. FML

#20830944
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54436) - you deserved it (3677)

On 08/10/2013 at 4:56pm - kids - by rachel (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, I discovered that I have caught head lice from my son. Unfortunately, they are living in my chest hair. FML

#20902262
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38753) - you deserved it (3677)

On 09/30/2013 at 5:59pm - health - by hairy (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, in the middle of an exam, I was escorted out by the campus police due to suspicion of a concealed weapon. The officers couldn't stop laughing for 20 minutes when they found out the weapon was metal knitting needles. FML

#5710708
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34324) - you deserved it (3676)

On 10/07/2009 at 8:38pm - misc - by dangerousknitter (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I asked my mom why she decided to be a parent. She replied, in all seriousness, "Everyone else was doing it." FML

#13321505
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27928) - you deserved it (3676)

On 10/04/2010 at 8:57pm - kids - by ugh (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I discovered my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I've had in the last year. FML

#13466468
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44015) - you deserved it (3677)

On 10/16/2010 at 12:09am - intimacy - by Shooter71 - Sent from mobile version

Today, my husband passed a massive kidney stone. He is so proud of it that he wants to decorate our home with it. It is now sitting on my kitchen counter next to my produce. FML

Today, my landlord informed me that after 8 months, we are finally getting cable and internet in our house. I move out tomorrow. FML

#15948850
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34072) - you deserved it (3675)

On 04/27/2011 at 1:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my daughter had the words "Always classy, never trashy" tattooed across her lower back in crappy cursive lettering. She doesn't understand the irony. FML

#20400337
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35327) - you deserved it (3675)

On 12/15/2012 at 3:08am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)



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