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Today, I got a missed call from my dad, who hasn't talked to me in months and has vowed not to have anything to do with me. I called him back excitedly and apologized for missing his call, and we had a 20-second conversation about how his phone accidentally dialed my number. FML

#886706
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60701) - you deserved it (2980)

On 04/09/2009 at 2:48pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out I have hypersomnia, which is basically being constantly tired. I've been treated with depression for years because the symptoms are similar. I've failed out of college three times because of this. Now, I think I really am depressed. FML

Today, I learned that chivalry truly is dead when a seemingly fit man pushed me into a door to get a seat on the train before me. My leg is in a cast. FML

#16101857
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34257) - you deserved it (2980)

On 05/09/2011 at 3:38am - misc - by Username -

Today, as I was about to enter a public restroom, a man walked out and said, "You may want to hold your nose in there. I just took the biggest dump of my life." It was the ladies' restroom. FML

#20785565
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45065) - you deserved it (2980)

On 07/16/2013 at 12:41am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, on my first day as a lifeguard, a man had a heart attack in the pool. I jumped in, pulled him out, and even went to the hospital with him. He seemed genuinely offended, saying "You should've let me die." FML

#21198585
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43146) - you deserved it (2980)

On 07/04/2014 at 3:04pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands

Today, I discovered that my fiancé had tried to fake his own death because he thought it would be easier than confessing to the affair he was having. FML

#2820060
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64790) - you deserved it (2979)

On 06/12/2009 at 12:41am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my wife announced that she wanted a divorce. She'd actually started dating another man a few months ago, but she wanted to drag our marriage out as long as possible just in case her new relationship fell through. FML

#16515847
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41149) - you deserved it (2979)

On 06/05/2011 at 4:20pm - love - by mj - United States

Today, my mom tried to give me advice on how to improve my looks. I scoffed at her but listened to her advice anyway. She ended her tirade with, "I just want you to get laid someday." FML

#6480993
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19613) - you deserved it (2978)

On 11/27/2009 at 4:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Idaho)

Today, I decided to tell my husband our marriage was over after I found out that he'd not only been stealing from me, but he'd also been downloading child porn. He then asked if we could break up but live in the same house so I could help pay his bills. FML

#7353297
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40255) - you deserved it (2978)

On 01/15/2010 at 2:51am - love - by cuppincake (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, my fiancé suggested we bring his elderly mother with us on our honeymoon. FML

#14422998
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33022) - you deserved it (2978)

On 01/01/2011 at 8:30am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I'm the coach of a football team. To celebrate winning a game, they poured a cooler of blue Gatorade over my head. This would've been great, if not for the fact that I'm highly allergic to blue food dye. FML

#16256468
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35249) - you deserved it (2978)

On 05/19/2011 at 7:32pm - health - by blue. -

Today, I got into my car after a long shift at work. When I looked in my rear view mirror, a horrifyingly evil face grinned at me from the back window. I leaped out of the car, only to be chased around by two people in clown masks. It turned out to be a prank set up by my co-workers. FML

#18112365
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27910) - you deserved it (2978)

On 10/30/2011 at 3:13pm - work - by Katrin - Norway

Today, my mother met my sister's boyfriend for the first time. As we talked about it later over dinner she said she didn't like him. When I asked why, she paused for a second and said, "Well, he really reminds me of you." FML

#20611376
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38085) - you deserved it (2978)

On 04/21/2013 at 8:27pm - misc - by Ellwood - United States



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