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Today, I spent the night in hospital. As soon as I was alone, I writhed and twisted in all directions in my attempts to pee in a bottle left precisely for that purpose. It was at that moment that the doctor, a good-looking guy, came in. My legs were spread wide and I was right in the middle of doing my business. FML

#338
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25327) - you deserved it (2486)

On 11/19/2008 at 12:59am - health - by la poisse - Sent from mobile version

Today, I walked in on my parents doing it. Luckily they didn't see me so I slipped out. I looked outside, trying to take my mind of the horrors I had just witnessed, only to realize my dad's car wasn't in the driveway. FML

#5065139
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63816) - you deserved it (2486)

On 09/05/2009 at 6:11pm - kids - by WTF (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, it's my birthday, and the only person that called me was my boss. He wants me to cover his shift tonight. FML

#13448275
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29138) - you deserved it (2486)

On 10/14/2010 at 6:10pm - work - by unloved - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I found out that if a guy you've been dating starts acting weird, there's probably a reason why. Like, perhaps, a wife and two kids. FML

#20050674
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26496) - you deserved it (2486)

On 08/31/2012 at 8:02am - love - by yonanon - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was yelled at while I was shopping by some lady, because she saw my tattoo on my arm. She screamed that I'm the "spawn of Satan" and told me I'm going to hell. It's a fake tattoo of Mickey mouse. FML

#20581879
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34168) - you deserved it (2486)

On 04/09/2013 at 7:05am - misc - by MickyIsEVIL - Japan (Aichi)

Today, I got fired from my job at an age care facility because I was too nice to my residents. My boss told me "They're deaf, blind and about to jump head first into the grave. We don't pay you to be kind." FML

#20842873
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45705) - you deserved it (2486)

On 08/18/2013 at 7:43am - work - by sweet23 (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was late for work and took a taxi. The driver tells me he tried to commit suicide recently. I listen to him for 20mins, sat outside my workplace with the meter off. He charges me £5.80 and my boss gives me a warning for being late. FML

#1315
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15629) - you deserved it (2485)

On 01/16/2009 at 2:27am - work - by hapless - United Kingdom (London)

Today, was the first day all week I got to sleep in. I woke up this beautiful morning to the sun shining in my window and hundreds of carpenter ants crawling over my sheets and me. FML

#4677872
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39909) - you deserved it (2485)

On 08/20/2009 at 8:45am - misc - by tommy3824 (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was supposed to go on a date with a guy who lives on the same floor as me in my apartment complex. I got stood up. Instead I got to listen to him doing the girl who lives next door to me. FML

#14647412
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26821) - you deserved it (2485)

On 01/20/2011 at 3:52am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I had a stranger scream at me that I was a whore and I was trying to steal her boyfriend. She then said my full name, stating my previous hair colour, my recent activities and that her boyfriend had been my year nine dance partner. I officially have a stalker. FML

#14728347
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30297) - you deserved it (2485)

On 01/27/2011 at 2:17am - love - by dadum (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, just three days into a much-needed vacation, my 5-year-old daughter has come down with chickenpox. FML

#19506511
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20420) - you deserved it (2485)

On 04/21/2012 at 3:26pm - kids - by Lorena - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my mom is convinced that my cat is the reincarnation of Vincent van Gogh. Why? He sleeps under my sunflowers and is a ginger tabby cat. FML

#20854246
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30728) - you deserved it (2485)

On 08/25/2013 at 9:16pm - animals - by KatVanGogh (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was sleeping in my room when I awoke to an unfamiliar female voice in my apartment followed by a thud. I walked out to find a drunk girl I've never met collapsed in my doorway. After puking all over the place, she had me call her father who picked her up 10 minutes later. FML

#6857935
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22569) - you deserved it (2484)

On 12/21/2009 at 12:20am - misc - by goblue (man) - United States (Michigan)



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