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Today, I won a goldfish at the amusement park. My little brother took him out of the bowl because he thought he was drowning. FML

#21246787
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39306) - you deserved it (3375)

On 08/27/2014 at 10:33pm - kids - by That idiot - United States (Nevada)

Today, I fell down a set of stairs while going into my basement. With a horrible pain in my left leg, I called out to my boyfriend to help me. Apparently a commercial about grass was more important. FML

#6215205
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26448) - you deserved it (3374)

On 11/08/2009 at 5:38pm - health - by Elizabeh (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I got caught trying to steal my own cat back from my neighbor. FML

#17423512
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29315) - you deserved it (3374)

On 08/09/2011 at 11:00pm - animals - by Nekro_Kat - United States (California)

Today, I got back from a weekend at my best friend's house. Apparently, he and his friend invented a new game. It involves sticking duct tape to their pubic hairs, ripping them out, and sticking as many as possible on my face and body before I wake up. FML

#21276742
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32167) - you deserved it (3374)

On 10/13/2014 at 4:17am - misc - by wtfguys - United States

Today, I was snowboarding when a skier cut me off, resulting in me colliding with a 12 year old girl. The girl was totally fine, and I was alright except for a slight nose bleed. I apologized to the girl, then her mom hit me over the back with a ski pole as I snowboarded away. FML

#16410234
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31291) - you deserved it (3373)

On 05/29/2011 at 11:27pm - misc - by kerdersty - Canada

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heated argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus". FML

#20668913
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48076) - you deserved it (3373)

On 05/17/2013 at 11:52am - misc - by Sonofa - Canada (Alberta)

Today, some kids used firecrackers to blow up my mailbox. This is the third time this week. FML

#20961862
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38739) - you deserved it (3373)

On 11/18/2013 at 5:14am - kids - by kids next door - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I cleaned up my dog's crap after my wife asked me. 5 minutes later she yelled at me for being lazy as she slammed the door leaving for work. My dog shit in the exact same spot apparently to make me look stupid. FML

#14952962
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34979) - you deserved it (3372)

On 02/12/2011 at 9:17pm - animals - by Username - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I called my boyfriend over and over again and he never answered. His mom just called me and asked how I was holding up. I asked her what she meant and she had to tell me he checked himself into rehab because he was addicted to heroin. FML

#18708494
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33861) - you deserved it (3372)

On 01/04/2012 at 6:29pm - misc - by jada - United States (Ohio)

Today, I stayed in a hotel near the college I was applying for a scholarship. We were eating breakfast and there were some other applicants in the breakfast room. As we walked away, my mother yelled, "My daughter's gonna get this scholarship so there's no reason for you muddafuckas to show up." FML

#20511941
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38242) - you deserved it (3372)

On 02/18/2013 at 9:01am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I learned that the excessive groin sweating I've been trying to deal with for weeks isn't groin sweating. It's a slow and steady stream of urine that I have no control over. FML

#5743316
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48466) - you deserved it (3371)

On 10/09/2009 at 5:25pm - health - by lizzzie (woman) - United Kingdom (Dorset)

Today, my mom told my dad to get me extra absorbent pads, very loudly, in a crowded mall. FML

#13904254
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26149) - you deserved it (3371)

On 11/19/2010 at 9:45pm - misc - by Dammit... - United States (California)

Today, I went to my "not so technologically advanced" grandma's house to help her out with her computer. It appears she has very interesting conversations with the man who lives in the apartment above her. FML

#15061511
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28012) - you deserved it (3371)

On 02/21/2011 at 2:46am - intimacy - by Josie (woman) - Australia (Queensland)



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