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Today, my boyfriend told me he likes to do things the old-fashioned way, and that he wouldn't propose to me without my father's blessing. My dad died 3 years ago, and he knows it. FML

by lonethong15 / 08/08/2014 at 6:53pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, while studying for a big test at the library, some idiots started playing hide-and-seek. After putting up with their snorting and giggling for nearly an hour, I finally lost my shit and told them to knock it off. I then got kicked out for causing a disturbance. FML

by faaail / 03/24/2015 at 12:51pm / Ireland (Cork) / Miscellaneous

Today, I planned on telling the girl I like that I have feelings for her. What I didn't plan on was having a panic attack and whispering "I really like you!" super creepily and immediately saying "bye" and running away in shame. FML

by Afroman720 / 08/26/2015 at 12:14pm / United States (Utah) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I found out that the guy I like was only coming to my house to get closer to my brother. FML

by brother love / 08/13/2010 at 1:33am / United Kingdom / Love

Today, my mom said we are having a party for the 4th of July. Her definition of a party is my grandma coming over. FML

by Kate / 07/04/2011 at 3:06pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, at work, I politely asked a patron to be quieter; I was hit in the face. I work in a library. FML

by rubgy_lover / 06/27/2013 at 11:02am / Canada (British Columbia) / Work

Today, I went on what I thought was a date. After a wonderful night with a perfect gentleman, he told me how excited he is that he's moving in with his girlfriend next week, and thanked me for reassuring him that he doesn't want anyone but her. FML

by Anonymous / 11/09/2013 at 12:17am / United States (California) / Love

Today, my boyfriend of eleven months broke up with me, but adamantly insisted I didn't move out of our apartment, because he can't pay the rent alone. FML

by Jaded618 / 12/05/2010 at 7:48am / United States / Love

Today, I had a relaxing night watching movies with my room-mates. Everyone but I had a girl over to lie with during the movie. The closest I got all night was the multiple times my room-mate's dog tried to mount me. FML

by Hollywoodanonymous / 10/31/2011 at 2:57am / United States (Idaho) / Intimacy

Today, as part of my job as a swimming instructor, I had to help a teenage boy learn how to float. This involves supporting the person's back as they try to float. His boner stood straight up. FML

by julia / 11/30/2012 at 8:02pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, someone stole my card number and tried to use it. Every transaction got declined, not because the bank knew it was a fraudulent charge, but because I'm so poor that he couldn't make even a single purchase. FML

by NykP / 10/02/2013 at 12:56pm / United States (Arizona) / Money

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my parents were screaming so loud about who clogged the toilet that a neighbor called the police because they thought someone was in danger. FML

by dear god why / 05/26/2014 at 4:28pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found a schedule in my dorm room that I share with three other guys. Looking at it closer I realized it was my schedule with notes written in all around it. My roommates have planned their entire days around mine so we won't have any interaction at all. I thought we got along great. FML

by Anonymous / 12/03/2010 at 8:09pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous