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Today, due to a flat tire, I only had 20 minutes to complete a 35 minute walk to catch my train. I ended up sprinting up the snow-covered frozen hill in heels, luggage in hand, only to arrive 1 minute in time, and to find out that the train had been cancelled. Next train in 1 hour. FML

Today, I learned that an antidepressant that works too well is a stimulant. I've been jittering and twitching like a meth-head, and my co-workers are asking when Jesse will be showing up with my "stuff". FML

#20896646
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35058) - you deserved it (2954)

On 09/26/2013 at 9:50am - health - by CancerFdMyLife (man) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, after months of job seeking, I finally got a phone interview request for a company. Excited, I prepared for the interview and conducted extensive research on the company. The interview ended within a minute. They'd got the wrong person. FML

#21219731
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37348) - you deserved it (2976)

On 07/24/2014 at 10:04pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I made a joke about having a wedding to my mom and she told me not to joke about something that will probably never happen. FML

#21465
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31986) - you deserved it (2953)

On 02/10/2009 at 5:30pm - misc - by NoWedding (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my mother-in-law gifted us with a new microwave. I told her it was too much and we didn't really need it. Her response, "I just want my grandkids to have food that tastes good for once." I'm a chef. FML

#5448265
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36503) - you deserved it (2953)

On 09/24/2009 at 3:10pm - misc - by badcook (woman) - United States

Today, I auditioned for a part in a play. I've been practicing for months, and was very excited. After I finished singing, the director whispered something to the other judges, and they all laughed. Hard. So much for the lead role. FML

#13881545
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20474) - you deserved it (2953)

On 11/17/2010 at 9:31pm - misc - by embarrassed -

Today, I found that there is nothing worse than coming home to a snake slithering across your kitchen floor. Except when it disappears into your cabinets. FML

#17391644
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26457) - you deserved it (2953)

On 08/06/2011 at 10:49pm - misc - by Tim (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, while walking on the sidewalk, someone hit me with their car. They yelled at me for being in their way. FML

#17426296
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31747) - you deserved it (2953)

On 08/10/2011 at 3:22am - misc - by TheKunitzShow14 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my guidance counselor told me that I'll have to join my school's special education needs sector. This is because I can't attend school properly due to chronic issues with severe pain. So much for my 3.9 GPA and being in the top 5% of my class. FML

#20632758
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45745) - you deserved it (2953)

On 04/30/2013 at 1:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I used the restroom at a department store. While I was in my stall, I overheard a little girl say to her mother, "I see someone wearing pink!" I remembered that I was wearing pink just as she finished her thought, "And she's pooping." She was peeking at me through the stall. FML

#2674765
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47128) - you deserved it (2952)

On 06/06/2009 at 10:25pm - kids - by Shelly (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was dealing with a psychiatric patient with a colonostomy bag. She got agitated and ripped the bag from her abdomen and threw it at my face. I got a bag filled with poop thrown at my face. FML

#2364469
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52034) - you deserved it (2952)

On 05/28/2009 at 1:04am - health - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, after finally moving into a better neighborhood, my family and I were greeted by the elderly couple who live window to window to us. How? By hearing them have sex loudly and then praying for forgiveness even louder. Welcome to the neighborhood! FML

#10628803
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34090) - you deserved it (2952)

On 05/19/2010 at 3:20pm - intimacy - by GrossedOutKary (woman) - Puerto Rico

Today, I found out my daughter has a higher paid job in the same company I work in. I also found out she is dating my boss. FML

#14160788
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30853) - you deserved it (2952)

On 12/11/2010 at 12:10am - work - by Anonymous - Indonesia



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Tuesday 22 July 2014

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