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Today, my family and I went to the mall. We all split up in a department store to shop for our own clothes. While shopping, I caught my dad feeling up a mannequin in the back corner of the store. FML

#10414091
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39196) - you deserved it (3237)

On 05/08/2010 at 6:07am - intimacy - by notmydad. (woman) - Philippines (Manila)

Today, I was taking the subway to school. It was around 6:30am and I was listening to music and catching up on homework. When I took my headphones off to readjust them, I heard some grunting. I looked over at the man across from me to see he was masturbating. FML

#256186
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67512) - you deserved it (3236)

On 03/09/2009 at 10:04pm - intimacy - by danesy - United States (New York)

Today, I visited my vacation cabin. I've been planning to sell it, and it was in perfect condition when I last visited about 6 months ago. I walked in the door to find the floor covered in muddy pawprints and bloody remainders of meals. It appears some bears moved in during my absence. FML

#13313277
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26387) - you deserved it (3236)

On 10/04/2010 at 2:46am - misc - by screwthewilderness (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my boyfriend asked me to beat him up so he could look tough around his friends. When I just stared at him, he added, "Please don't break anything though. Nothing too serious." FML

#17845836
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23623) - you deserved it (3236)

On 09/27/2011 at 4:28am - health - by toughbf (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend. I had been hiding the ring in the sock drawer. When I went to retrieve it, the ring was gone and in its place was a sticky note that said "NO." FML

#18508427
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53304) - you deserved it (3236)

On 12/14/2011 at 12:15am - love - by newlysingle (man) - United States

Today, the father of my child couldn't understand why he had been laid off from his job as a painter's assistant. He couldn't find a broom or vacuum, so he "cleaned" a carpet by laying down strips of painter's tape and pulling it up. FML

#19586827
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19458) - you deserved it (3236)

On 05/07/2012 at 11:57am - work - by notrocketscience (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, neither of my parents fought for my custody. FML

#19763325
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51256) - you deserved it (3236)

On 06/10/2012 at 12:19am - misc - by Anon - United States

Today, my sister-in-law pooped with the bathroom door open until my husband had to tell her to close it, then she came out with unwashed hands and started rooting through the cookies. This isn't even the most unhygienic thing she's done today. FML

#20871127
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50193) - you deserved it (3236)

On 09/07/2013 at 7:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I discovered a bat in my new apartment. I found him in my shoe... with my foot. FML

#12583063
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32377) - you deserved it (3235)

On 08/17/2010 at 1:09pm - misc - by Bruce (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I learned how unhappy my husband is in our marriage. Apparently he also can't find a good woman. We didn't have a heart-to-heart, I read his woes in a blog. FML

#16542876
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29042) - you deserved it (3235)

On 06/07/2011 at 5:28am - love - by S. Tucker - United States

Today, I caught my mother trying to text on her iPhone, with her nipple. FML

#18364433
301 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39191) - you deserved it (3235)

On 11/27/2011 at 6:46am - misc - by Anonymous - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I went on a blind date that my friend set up. He greeted me with a winning smile, a belch, and the words, "Nice tits." I'm beginning to lose hope. FML

#21265612
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34450) - you deserved it (3235)

On 09/26/2014 at 2:56am - love - by bri_sci94 - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I took a cough drop to soothe my sore throat, only to choke, gag, and spend the next ten minutes at the point of vomiting because the bitter lozenge got stuck in my windpipe. FML

#13251603
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20505) - you deserved it (3233)

On 09/29/2010 at 5:29pm - health - by bitter cherry - United States (Minnesota)



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