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Today, I celebrated my 18th birthday. Alone. My only birthday wish came from the police officer who gave me a ticket. FML

#6190643
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29871) - you deserved it (3309)

On 11/07/2009 at 12:24am - misc - by bdayloser (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I politely asked my friend if she would repay me the £20 she owes me. She shouted at me, called me an insensitive bitch, and refuses to pay me back as apparently she can't afford to. Her holiday to Italy next week begs to differ. FML

#11625118
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30872) - you deserved it (3309)

On 07/03/2010 at 12:15am - misc - by learntmylesson - Sent from mobile version

Today, when I went to pick my kid up from daycare, I found out that he had run away. The rest of my afternoon consisted of me screaming his name, looking for him. I then returned to the daycare center. He thought it would be funny if he hid in the trash. FML

#14560893
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28513) - you deserved it (3309)

On 01/12/2011 at 11:42pm - kids - by tatortot7707 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my wife tried to refill the windshield wiper fluid on her own. However, she poured it where the oil goes. Now the car is having major issues. Last week I lost my job, and I have no idea how much this is going to cost to fix. FML

#17619423
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30410) - you deserved it (3309)

On 08/30/2011 at 5:35am - money - by BadTime (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I took the day off work to be with my wife, since she's always bemoaning my lack of romantic gestures. As thanks, she spent most of the day reading Fifty Shades of Grey, which is basically a blatant plagiarism of Twilight, starring a pair of two-dimensional BDSM freaks. FML

#19662141
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17862) - you deserved it (3309)

On 05/22/2012 at 12:11pm - love - by boblaj (man) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, a guy I've been seeing for a while sent me a link to a porn site, with the message, "Holy fuck, isn't this your mom?!" Thinking he was joking around, I clicked the link just to see what sick shit he wanted to show me. It was my mom. FML

#20079475
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62427) - you deserved it (3309)

On 09/19/2012 at 4:41pm - intimacy - by identitychangeplease - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I signed up for a psych experiment. I was a damsel in distress on the side of the highway, but no one stopped. Back at the lab, another participant said a half dozen people helped her. The professor was testing how attractiveness effects altruism. I was the unattractive subject. FML

#6651455
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35787) - you deserved it (3308)

On 12/07/2009 at 4:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I discovered that my husband is a tad paranoid after finding out that our cat has worms. He and I were in the middle of sharing a romantic shower following something of a dry spell when he bent over, spread his cheeks apart and asked, in earnest, "is there a worm sticking out of my ass?" FML

#12926382
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34204) - you deserved it (3308)

On 09/06/2010 at 12:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, four hours before a test, I received an email from my professor saying that the test had been canceled. When I checked my email again before bed, I found another email from my professor saying that his email had been hacked and the test was was still on. FML

#15680031
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37559) - you deserved it (3308)

On 04/07/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Puerto Rico)

Today, my neighbor's sons decided it would be funny to throw rocks at my house. I went outside to scold them and saw my other neighbors gathered around, watching. They didn't stop them because they thought I wasn't home. FML

#21014729
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37697) - you deserved it (3308)

On 01/02/2014 at 9:24pm - misc - by Frustrated (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my grandma got up at 6:30am, clattered about the bathroom then sang religious songs at the top of her voice for half an hour. Apparently this is her normal routine, weekends included. She is staying with us for a month. FML

#15705276
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28908) - you deserved it (3307)

On 04/09/2011 at 4:21am - misc - by Riley (woman) - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)

Today, after I moved into my college dorm three days ago, my roommate is still convinced that she is a cat. FML

#16099079
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27437) - you deserved it (3307)

On 05/08/2011 at 11:22pm - animals - by SMCHR (woman) - Ireland

Today, I noticed a woman struggling to work a parking meter, so I went over to help. She took one look at me before screaming, hitting me in the face, and running back to her car. FML

#17030177
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27459) - you deserved it (3307)

On 07/08/2011 at 4:02pm - misc - by Username - United States



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