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Today, my boyfriend and I were chatting on MSN. He had to go run down to the corner market but left his webcam on. Shortly after he left I watched his mother steal 60 dollars out of his wallet. He doesn't believe me. FML

#3764935
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44587) - you deserved it (2738)

On 07/15/2009 at 1:04am - love - by wtf (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up with a bloody nose and my lamp next to me in bed. Apparently I grabbed the cord of the lamp and yanked while I was sleeping, and it fell on my face. The worst part? My boyfriend saw it was going to happen, but didn't stop me because he thought it would be funny to "see my reaction." FML

#6313431
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23422) - you deserved it (2738)

On 11/15/2009 at 2:38pm - misc - by oww - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my teacher used an online program and accused me of plagiarism. According to the program, I plagiarized my own last name. FML

Today, my math teacher decided to use my acne as an example of symmetry in front of the whole class. FML

#5924929
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45526) - you deserved it (2737)

On 10/21/2009 at 2:59am - health - by acneface (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my dog received a christmas card before I did. FML

#6678775
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24397) - you deserved it (2737)

On 12/09/2009 at 10:33am - animals - by amywee (woman) - United Kingdom (York)

Today, my Mom felt the need to walk around school and tell everyone to be nice to me because I just started my period. FML

#12616520
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49414) - you deserved it (2737)

On 08/19/2010 at 12:12am - intimacy - by Jordid - United States (Colorado)

Today, I'm going on an 8 hour drive with my insane family. This usually means screaming arguments, graphic conversations about my dad's pubes, some karaoke, plenty of farting, some stale Pringles, and an obese golden retriever on my lap the entire time. Arizona, here we come. FML

#13495901
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21708) - you deserved it (2737)

On 10/18/2010 at 4:56am - misc - by fmmlll (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had my last orchestra concert and had a large solo. My dad came to watch and record it; however, the whole time he recorded another girl, thinking it was me. FML

#20728759
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42315) - you deserved it (2737)

On 06/16/2013 at 2:37am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, I went to visit my parents. Dad went on a religious tirade, and Mum got sick of him and pelted a Brazil nut at his head. Dad then lost his shit, and told Mum to go to her room and pray. I now remember why I moved out of home in the first place. FML

#5225291
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28927) - you deserved it (2735)

On 09/13/2009 at 8:42am - misc - by Sigh (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, a woman laughed after hearing my voice for the first time. This happens whenever I meet someone new, without fail. FML

#14022149
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27995) - you deserved it (2735)

On 11/29/2010 at 9:22am - misc - by Username -

Today, it was a little colder than it should be for this time of year, and as a result I was using the heater in my car. Apparently within the last four months, a mouse managed to make his way into my heater vent and die. I can not get the smell of death out of my car. FML

#11164761
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30612) - you deserved it (2735)

On 06/13/2010 at 5:56am - animals - by spenmy - United States (Colorado)

Today, my parents think that I don't realize all the sexual euphemisms in their conversations. One of the more recent ones being made by my dad at the dinner table: "This sausage is great, honey, but mine is bigger and tastier!" FML

#17094831
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36998) - you deserved it (2735)

On 07/13/2011 at 2:16pm - intimacy - by wittlegirl - United States (California)

Today, my husband sat me down on the couch so he could share some "awesome" news with me. He excitedly declared that he and his idiot drinking buddies are planning on running a real-life Fight Club out of our basement. FML

#19247748
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21992) - you deserved it (2735)

On 03/09/2012 at 9:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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