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Today, my mum got engaged to her American pen-pal, who is in prison over there for murder. FML

Today, after returning from taking my sister off to college, my parents told me that our house would be a lot quieter with my sister gone. Not because she's loud, but because she has friends and I apparently don't. FML

#21252132
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36453) - you deserved it (3422)

On 09/04/2014 at 10:59pm - misc - by AllieG33 - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I got chewed out by a parent for putting her kid underwater. I teach swim lessons. FML

#21209168
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41479) - you deserved it (3422)

On 07/14/2014 at 7:04pm - work - by AFH2O - United States (California)

Today, I invited my deadbeat dad over for dinner, hoping we could resolve our issues and build a proper relationship. Just minutes after he arrived, I caught him stealing money from my purse. He actually said I owe him for raising me. He ditched my mom and me when I was 5. FML

#21255044
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43888) - you deserved it (3422)

On 09/09/2014 at 12:47pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my dad and mom and I were going out to eat dinner. My dad wanted a romantic dinner just with my mom so he told me to make an excuse not to go. I did, which ended up as a huge fight, grounded and phone taken away. My dad just stood there in the background putting thumbs up. FML

#6512953
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39471) - you deserved it (3421)

On 11/29/2009 at 1:10pm - misc - by Yoooooo0 (woman) - United States

Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend, when things got a little frisky and we started making out. It was my first time French-kissing, and apparently he has a very sensitive gag reflex, because the moment my tongue went in, he started retching, and vomited moments later. FML

#20134512
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25328) - you deserved it (3421)

On 10/26/2012 at 5:59pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Switzerland (Zurich)

Today, my boyfriend told me that we need to talk. I think he dumped me, but I'm not sure, because he muttered it in Russian and quickly left. FML

#21009542
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42339) - you deserved it (3421)

On 12/29/2013 at 5:58pm - love - by RustyRuski (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, one of my two roommates moved out without warning after we discovered that the rent hadn't been paid in full in a month, the utility bill hadn't been paid in two months, and the electric bill hadn't been paid in three months. We found out when the power was turned off. FML

Today, someone told me they liked my personality when i'm drunk. I asked, "what about when I'm sober?". "No, only when you're drinking." FML

#2422
15 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19558) - you deserved it (3420)

On 01/24/2009 at 9:53am - misc - by the-yao - United States (California)

Today, I was standing on a desk at work to run wiring in a suspended ceiling, since we have no ladder. My phone rang, I rushed to answer it, tripping and smashing my leg. It was my boss, calling to tell me he was bringing over a ladder. FML

#4954
14 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19130) - you deserved it (3420)

On 02/01/2009 at 7:11pm - work - by fonsui - United States (New York)

Today, in Burger King, I was leaning against the railing looking at the menu. I saw an old man using the rail to walk, so I got out of the way. He ran his hand across my back and said "You're so cute, I'd like to take you home and lock you in my basement naked so you can't leave" and walked out. FML

#4696975
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59053) - you deserved it (3420)

On 08/21/2009 at 12:01am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Dakota)

Today, I was at my grandfather's house and my car was low on gas. He said I could put some of his gas in my car. He accidentally gave me the wrong tank to pump it out of, and I put fuel in my car that he uses for his small plane. It never ran better until the engine exploded. FML

#4751851
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31951) - you deserved it (3420)

On 08/23/2009 at 1:10am - misc - by Boltz719 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I took a 40 minute bus ride home from work. The first 20 minutes were spent listening to the drunk man behind me moan uncontrollably and belch. The last 20 minutes were spent trying to ignore the vomit he left on my back as he got up to leave. FML

#16067039
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35258) - you deserved it (3420)

On 05/06/2011 at 11:47am - misc - by eewww (woman) - United Kingdom



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