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Today, my mom had an appointment with my teacher after class. She never showed. My teacher ended up driving me home. FML

#16560118
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35293) - you deserved it (3120)

On 06/08/2011 at 9:03am - work - by iloveyoutoomom (man) - France (Rhone-Alpes)

Today, I heard my surgeon mutter to a nurse how easy it would be to kill me on the operating table and make it look like an accident. FML

#20940427
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47087) - you deserved it (3120)

On 10/31/2013 at 4:42pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Leicester)

Today, I was stood up on a date. Her excuse? "I had to work out." FML

#14249095
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23789) - you deserved it (3120)

On 12/18/2010 at 3:33pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, at my new job, I took some food out to a customer. Walking away, I heard a lady mumble, "Oh my God, you could never pay me enough to wear that." FML

#14197069
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20819) - you deserved it (3119)

On 12/13/2010 at 11:13pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I went to go use an automatic cart in Walmart because I broke my hip in January. They were all being used by morbidly obese people throughout the store. I asked a manager if she could get me one, but apparently their weight issues are more impeding than my broken hip. FML

#14873123
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35043) - you deserved it (3119)

On 02/06/2011 at 9:36pm - misc - by LimpMcgee (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I volunteered to cater an event at school. A little girl asked for a big slice of cake so I gave it to her. She then puked everywhere and her parents blamed me and made me clean it up. The little girl sat there smiling at me while I cleaned. FML

#18504719
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24989) - you deserved it (3119)

On 12/13/2011 at 5:43pm - work - by thathottchickk - United States (Washington)

Today, my parents got a new dog. It attacks me every time I laugh. FML

#18714310
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27078) - you deserved it (3119)

On 01/05/2012 at 7:06am - animals - by Imgonnahaveabf - United States

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend pulling off scabs and eating them. My scabs. FML

#19448273
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37609) - you deserved it (3118)

On 04/11/2012 at 5:53am - health - by Scabby (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, my husband's recent obsession with The Sopranos since James Gandolfini died went a step further into the ridiculous, when he tried to encourage some ducks to land in our swimming pool by throwing loaves of bread into it, while bellowing at them with a 'Noo Joisey' Wise Guy accent. FML

#20770230
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31637) - you deserved it (3118)

On 07/08/2013 at 7:57am - misc - by Not Mrs Soprano (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my mother had a full-on hissy fit because of the clothes I was wearing. Not because she thought they were inappropriate, but because I was "stealing her look." FML

#20769263
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39654) - you deserved it (3118)

On 07/07/2013 at 7:41pm - misc - by malicious_melons - United States (California)

Today, my parents bought me a wine glass with "Who needs a man?" painted all over it. Cute, until after dinner my mom looked me in the eyes and asked with complete sincerity, "Kara, are you gay?" My parents tried to get me to come out. I'm straight. FML

#2140497
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48304) - you deserved it (3117)

On 05/21/2009 at 9:06am - misc - by pa (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out I'm pregnant. My husband and I are divorcing because HE had an affair. He now wants a paternity test. FML

#14024003
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31154) - you deserved it (3117)

On 11/29/2010 at 2:20pm - kids - by preggers - United States (Texas)

Today, I received a bouquet of flowers. I thought they might be from my crush, so I excitedly opened the card. It was from my druggie ex-boyfriend, who apparently can't move on with his life even after three years. The contents of the card? "Baby, I got you like a habit, and I can't give you up". FML

#8250207
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21686) - you deserved it (3117)

On 02/14/2010 at 1:52pm - love - by RosesAreRed (woman) - United States (South Carolina)



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