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Today, my dad took a call while driving. He always yells and curses at people who talk on their cell while driving. I asked him to get off the phone because it's dangerous, and told him he's being a hypocrite. He shook his head at me and continued talking. Seconds later, we got into an accident. FML

#5719092
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38549) - you deserved it (3451)

On 10/08/2009 at 7:40am - misc - by Irony (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I found out that my engagement ring was actually my husband's ex-fiancée's. FML

#17562855
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30362) - you deserved it (3451)

On 08/23/2011 at 10:29pm - love - by llord - United States

Today, I went to a friend's sweet sixteen. Since I didn't know any else at the party I was really happy when the mother told me she sat me next to someone she thought I would have a lot in common with. He ended up being mentally challenged and talked to a sock puppet the whole party. FML

#908452
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53707) - you deserved it (3450)

On 04/10/2009 at 10:37pm - misc - by NotRetarded (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out my girlfriend and her best friend compare the dumps they take to common transportation. They comment about it on each others facebook page. My girlfriend's last one was apparently a 'coach bus'. FML

#7600232
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22273) - you deserved it (3450)

On 01/26/2010 at 10:14pm - health - by poops - United States

Today, my ex-girlfriend told my entire family and all my friends that we broke up because I came out to her. They all believe her. Twenty two texts and counting. FML

#16525568
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33272) - you deserved it (3450)

On 06/06/2011 at 3:55am - misc - by rapturezz - United States

Today, I was verbally abused by a customer at my job. Apparently, wearing "ugly, thick-framed hipster glasses as a fashion statement is a HUGE faux pas." These are my actual prescription glasses, and "faux pas" is not pronounced "fox paws". FML

#20840053
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44210) - you deserved it (3450)

On 08/16/2013 at 7:08am - misc - by hipster glasses - United States

Today, I started my first job as a power line technician. My boss's first words to me were, "I have a good feeling about you, kid!" That would've been great if he hadn't said, "Although, the last time I had a good feeling, the guy died." right afterwards. FML

#21085148
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42319) - you deserved it (3450)

On 03/12/2014 at 8:11pm - work - by Anon - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, wanting to change from the usual pizza/coca cola menu, I decide to cook. After spending 1h30 making a "beef chili with ancho, mole, and cumin" I sprinkle a bit of salt on top of it. The top came off the salt. I think it's back to pizzas for me. FML

#1229
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21491) - you deserved it (3449)

On 01/15/2009 at 11:00am - health - by j0j0 - France (Aquitaine)

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend because I found an email he had written to an ex-fling telling her he was single and wanted to meet up. He wrote that email from my computer, in my apartment, on Valentine's Day. FML

#197366
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75170) - you deserved it (3449)

On 03/03/2009 at 5:07pm - love - by JTo (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while I was out of the house, my 6 year old brother stole my new waterproof camera, dunked it into the toilet holding onto the wrist strap, and flushed repeatedly to see if it lived up to its "waterproof promise." It didn't. FML

#14023437
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27190) - you deserved it (3449)

On 11/29/2010 at 1:02pm - misc - by fmylife. - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I painted a kids room at my new nanny job while the dad "helped" by staring at my ass and telling me how hard it is to position your "junk" correctly when wearing a speedo. First day on the job. FML

#15865508
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38056) - you deserved it (3449)

On 04/20/2011 at 9:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, while living in Florida, I had a conversation with my mother explaining that it might be best for me to come back home. Her response, "Don't worry, they have plenty of homeless shelters down there if you need a place to stay." Thanks Mom. FML

#20458436
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29089) - you deserved it (3449)

On 01/14/2013 at 1:51am - misc - by living_thedream (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my brother got a new saxophone. He thought a good way to break it in was to play it in my ear. Loudly. While I was sleeping. FML

#21001557
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36058) - you deserved it (3449)

On 12/22/2013 at 4:56pm - misc - by blackcarnation - United States (Connecticut)



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