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Today, my boyfriend of two years asked me to marry him so that we can consolidate our student loans. FML

#2376040
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51077) - you deserved it (3485)

On 05/28/2009 at 3:51pm - love - by loserface23 (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I got a text message from a number I didn't know telling me, "Fine. It's over, have a wonderful life." I've never had a girlfriend and now I get broken up with by girls I don't even know. FML

#5815085
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32532) - you deserved it (3486)

On 10/13/2009 at 11:52am - love - by dudezilla (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my doctor put me on some extra strength antibiotics for an infection. On the label it says "WARNING: may cause Diarrhea"... 'may cause' is a funny term... this is the second time I've sharted in my pants today. FML

#8153486
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24381) - you deserved it (3485)

On 02/12/2010 at 12:11am - health - by NotSoSick (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boyfriend and I broke up, and he came by to get his things while I was at work. When I got home I saw that the only thing he had taken was my cat. I only dated him for 5 months, I've had that cat for 14 years. FML

#14078710
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36127) - you deserved it (3485)

On 12/04/2010 at 12:20am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I found out my girlfriend of four years is legally married to a man in prison. He gets out next week. FML

#14254809
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41853) - you deserved it (3485)

On 12/19/2010 at 12:14am - love - by fouryearswasted - United States

Today, after a busy afternoon taking care of the kids, I was feeling really down about only being a mom these days, and I was hoping my husband would make me feel better when he got off work. In the middle of cuddling, he called me "mom." FML

#19991026
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20362) - you deserved it (3485)

On 07/29/2012 at 4:34pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I went on a first date with a guy I met at a speed dating event. He recommended the lamb shank, which I ordered without looking at the menu. When the waiter took my order, my date said, "wait, the lamb is $27, why don't you get the chicken". He then ordered the lamb for himself. FML

Today, I found out that my girlfriend's parents offered her a trip to Europe if she dumped me. She accepted, and broke up with me. Her parents were lying. FML

#14271579
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39697) - you deserved it (3484)

On 12/20/2010 at 11:15am - love - by pinkfloyd777 -

Today, my dad decided that my diploma makes a good pen-tester. FML

#11111501
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47266) - you deserved it (3484)

On 06/10/2010 at 8:57pm - misc - by dominator152 - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I found out that the blind man I've been helping for months at the grocery store by carrying his shopping around and stuff was actually faking his blindness. FML

#13442719
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27916) - you deserved it (3484)

On 10/14/2010 at 4:19am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, the only person to wish me a Happy Valentine's day was a wrong number calling my cell phone. FML

#14981056
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30005) - you deserved it (3484)

On 02/14/2011 at 10:07pm - love - by moe (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, during a lecture, my teacher jokingly talked about the time he was best buds with George Washington. Another student then asked, "Really? You knew him?" I'm in an advanced placement U.S. history class. FML

#21065125
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41160) - you deserved it (3484)

On 02/19/2014 at 12:12am - work - by Dsark (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mom got me a Christmas present. Since I'm a whovian, she thought it would be cool to get me what she thought was a sonic screwdriver. It was actually a dildo shaped as one. I opened the gift in front of my entire family. FML

#21323893
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33581) - you deserved it (3484)

On 12/25/2014 at 10:17am - intimacy - by whovian - United States (Maine)



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