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Today, my 6-year-old brother showed me the "books" he's been writing for the past week. My parents, who are first-generation immigrants, want him to take the books to school to show everyone. My only problem with this? The main character's name is "Wanker". FML

#21195314
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36139) - you deserved it (3250)

On 07/01/2014 at 5:41pm - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to catch a coach to London at 4 in the morning. I was late so I had to take any free seat, so sat down next to a seemingly sweet old man. Within ten minutes, the sweet old man was trying to kiss me and trying to pull me on top of him. Nobody said anything. The journey was 4 hours long. FML

#5017525
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42376) - you deserved it (3249)

On 09/03/2009 at 8:54am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I received a medical bill because my daughter thought it would be hilarious to try and fit her fist in her mouth. She succeeded in getting it in, but not in getting it out. FML

#3907328
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40001) - you deserved it (3249)

On 07/20/2009 at 3:10pm - health - by KnuckleSandwich (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I text messaged my mom from Afghanistan to let her know everything was okay. She responded, telling me not to message her so much because "the price of text messages really adds up." FML

#13842937
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36781) - you deserved it (3249)

On 11/14/2010 at 5:26pm - money - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, I found out that the reason why my boyfriend has a chipped tooth is because his teeth hit another girl's teeth while kissing her. FML

#12913788
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28028) - you deserved it (3249)

On 09/05/2010 at 4:14am - love - by ohmydog (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was having a chat with a customer. He asked if I was married, to which I replied, "No." Before I could say anything else, he said, "Thought so. You look too happy to be married." I was about to mention that I just got engaged. FML

#17513868
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25860) - you deserved it (3249)

On 08/18/2011 at 10:10pm - love - by ddeit (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my daughter wasn't feeling well, so we allowed her to sleep in bed with us. She snuggled right up with my husband. I felt a little jealous until she turned around and cuddled with me, just long enough to throw up all over me. She then flipped back over and snuggled with her dad. FML

#21314569
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31245) - you deserved it (3249)

On 12/09/2014 at 5:39pm - kids - by SickMaMa - United States (New York)

Today, I went for a job interview on my birthday. I had on a shirt and a tie on and I had my Blackberry in my pocket. I was running a little late, so I dashed outside. When I came out of the door, a bunch of my buddies screamed HAPPY BIRTHDAY! and poured Gatorade all over me. FML

#227236
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53195) - you deserved it (3248)

On 03/06/2009 at 4:24pm - misc - by Noname - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my fiancé told my mom that she screwed me up. I now have to write an apologetic e-mail to her for something that I agree with, in order for her to stop calling me crying. FML

#5847291
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20796) - you deserved it (3248)

On 10/15/2009 at 11:36pm - misc - by sighoutloud (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was talking with my uncle, when the subject of my abusive mother-in-law came up. He assured me he'd talk to her and straighten things out. Apparently this means posting on her Facebook wall threatening to "pimp-slap a bitch" if she doesn't get her "fat ass out of family business". FML

#17931369
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25200) - you deserved it (3248)

On 10/07/2011 at 10:40pm - misc - by ...... (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, I was walking back to my dorm with my boyfriend. He was being really sweet as he held my hand. We were about to kiss goodnight and as he pushed some hair out of my face he said, "Can we hurry it up? I'm about to rip one." FML

#21289293
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28716) - you deserved it (3248)

On 10/31/2014 at 8:39pm - love - by grossedout -

Today, at my job as a fast food manager, I saw one of my employees "trying to pick the bugs out" of our cookies. They were the raisins in them. FML

#21234756
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35737) - you deserved it (3248)

On 08/11/2014 at 10:18am - work - by mcmanager - United States (California)

Today, I was working at the daycare. As I left with my boyfriend, a kid came up to us and said that my boyfriend could do way better. FML

#21251155
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35701) - you deserved it (3248)

On 09/03/2014 at 1:40pm - kids - by unlucky - United States (New York)



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