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Today, we had a lockdown in our school for 2 hours because a man was sitting outside our school in his car with a gun in hand. I texted my mom telling her what was going on and that it's on the news. She responded saying "I'll tape it". FML

#5605398
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30611) - you deserved it (3190)

On 10/02/2009 at 3:17pm - misc - by dannyboy1422 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was riding my bike to the local grocery store to pick up some supplies for dinner. On the way down, traveling down a hill, I hit a drain with no lid. I went to grab hold of the nearest object to soften my fall. That nearest object was a barbed wire fence. FML

#4324727
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45864) - you deserved it (3190)

On 08/06/2009 at 12:55am - misc - by Lawrence (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I moved to Florida because I have poor circulation and need to be in a warm environment. The first day at my new job, I discovered my co-worker is an overweight man who wears a wool suit every day, and insists on keeping the office chilled to 65 degrees. I can't feel my fingers or toes. FML

#15919542
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30923) - you deserved it (3190)

On 04/25/2011 at 1:02pm - work - by lpspann87 - United States (Florida)

Today, I stayed in a hotel near the college I was applying for a scholarship. We were eating breakfast and there were some other applicants in the breakfast room. As we walked away, my mother yelled, "My daughter's gonna get this scholarship so there's no reason for you muddafuckas to show up." FML

#20511941
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36190) - you deserved it (3190)

On 02/18/2013 at 9:01am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I received a note from my creepy ex, whom I broke up with two years ago, saying how much he still misses me. I live over 100 miles away from him now. The note was hand-delivered to my new address. FML

#20665723
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46483) - you deserved it (3190)

On 05/15/2013 at 7:45pm - love - by joolsie (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, yet again, I got to my desk at work at 8 AM to find my laptop turned on and porn sites opened. Weird porn sites. I have no idea who is doing this, or how they have access to my office, or how they got my login password. HR thinks I'm making this up. FML

#20894123
165 comments

Today, I found out that my dad paid for my sister's friend's airplane ticket so she could attend my sister's wedding. I would have been there myself, but I couldn't afford the airplane ticket. FML

#20978054
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50349) - you deserved it (3190)

On 12/02/2013 at 8:28am - money - by Akestarr - United States (Indiana)

Today, I had sex with my new boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he said: "I know women who would be really self-conscious about nipples like that. I love that you accept yourself." I had no clue there was anything odd about my nipples. FML

#13339943
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32748) - you deserved it (3189)

On 10/06/2010 at 4:30am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, working my job, I had to explain to a kid that Pokemon is owned by Nintendo and they don't make it for the Xbox. Upset by this, he took hold of my leg and started biting. I'm also suspended, because his mother complained when I kicked him off me. FML

#20771337
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48446) - you deserved it (3189)

On 07/08/2013 at 10:08pm - work - by Garchomp (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I got laid off from work. I was being escorted to the elevator when another coworker stepped inside. He said, "How goes it?". I said, "It goes". Then he said, "At least we have a job". FML

#761537
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65416) - you deserved it (3188)

On 04/02/2009 at 1:36am - misc - by Dude - United States (California)

Today, after being in Europe for a month, I got home to find my door wide open and all my stuff gone. I called my dad who was supposed to be watching my house. He told me I should have had someone check on my place while I was gone. FML

#16181448
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35145) - you deserved it (3188)

On 05/15/2011 at 12:49am - misc - by jruth7 - United States (Colorado)

Today, my dad tore my room apart for the second time, looking for drug-making equipment. His reasoning is that I must be dealing drugs, because I'm a chemistry major who likes to watch Breaking Bad. FML

#20863540
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44067) - you deserved it (3188)

On 09/01/2013 at 7:06pm - misc - by WaltTheFuckDad (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had to buy a new boxcutter for work after our old one broke. It came in a box, the type which policy requires a boxcutter to open. FML

#20922948
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38674) - you deserved it (3188)

On 10/16/2013 at 5:42pm - misc - by Awahso - United States (Georgia)



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