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Today, at my sister's wedding, I went to the very back of the crowd of women waiting to catch the bouquet. Not only did I end up catching it, I was accosted by a crazy chick who ripped it out of my hands, screaming at me in Italian. I later found out she was already engaged. FML

#21187114
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40449) - you deserved it (3468)

On 06/24/2014 at 9:06pm - misc - by sadbuttrue. (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was at a party. The music changed to a slow dance. Everybody grabbed a partner and I was left on the dancefloor alone. Suddenly, this guy walks up to me. I swore that he was going to ask me to dance. He then says: "Could you hold me my drink?" and goes to dance with another girl. FML

#2704619
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49543) - you deserved it (3467)

On 06/07/2009 at 9:36pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I realized that in French, my name means "penis." This wouldn't be so bad if my dad wasn't fluent in French. FML

#12332692
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41062) - you deserved it (3467)

On 08/05/2010 at 2:24pm - love - by kiki - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had a job interview. I have major OCD, and I had to sit in a room with a man covered in cat hair, struggling to even survive for an hour and a half. FML

#19368838
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18149) - you deserved it (3467)

On 03/29/2012 at 7:13am - misc - by toryzhere - Canada

Today, I sent my girlfriend a long-overdue message telling her I feel like she doesn't really care about me any more, that it seems like she only ever calls me when she needs money, and that I'm even starting to suspect she may be cheating on me. 14 hours later, she replied: "TL;DR". FML

#21320982
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28727) - you deserved it (3467)

On 12/20/2014 at 3:45pm - love - by KalaKa (man) - United States

Today, I hired an exterminator to get the roaches out of the house I am renting. I came back from work and went to my bathroom, noticing that he used the plunger to unclog the toilet after he took a dump. After $150, there was shit all over my floor and plunger, and roaches still in my kitchen. FML

#2303239
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55946) - you deserved it (3466)

On 05/26/2009 at 5:18am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Greece (Attiki)

Today, at work I was told I'd be working over Christmas because I don't drink. Apparently if you're tee-total, you're not entitled to spend time with your family and are incapable of having fun. FML

#6565832
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27615) - you deserved it (3465)

On 12/02/2009 at 8:27am - work - by ostler (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I was sitting on my balcony reading a book. My upstairs neighbors thought that would be a good time to water their flowers. I'm now drenched in water, as is my book. FML

#16103716
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29746) - you deserved it (3465)

On 05/09/2011 at 11:05am - misc - by Nelson - Sweden

Today, I found one of my mom's old diaries that dated back to my infant days. I couldn't help but read a little. I'm now in great concern over how many times my mom wrote that she wanted to dunk me in the toilet or throw me against a wall. FML

#20010632
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23253) - you deserved it (3465)

On 08/09/2012 at 12:19am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my motorcycle was stolen from the 4th level of my “secure” gated parking garage. I strategically park it tightly between my car and a concrete wall to limit theft opportunity. They scratched my car trying to get it out. FML

#2885254
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44365) - you deserved it (3464)

On 06/14/2009 at 1:28pm - misc - by stolenbike (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I found out my mom intentionally puts extra butter and oil in the food she cooks for me because she wants me to be fatter than her. FML

#16355568
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54669) - you deserved it (3464)

On 05/26/2011 at 10:24am - health - by fatteningmeup (woman) - United States

Today, after putting an ad on Craigslist to sell a coat, I finally got a call. The guy on the phone seemed interested, and was especially curious to know if I could "model" it for him, in "stockings and suspenders." FML

#19552915
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24073) - you deserved it (3464)

On 04/30/2012 at 11:50am - intimacy - by NotAModel (woman) - United States

Today, I fainted. Instead of stopping to help, some guy stopped to draw a penis on my forehead. The EMT laughed. FML

#20692945
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46802) - you deserved it (3464)

On 05/29/2013 at 11:21am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States



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