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Today, it was my first day at my new job. My new boss asked me if I was single. After telling him I have been happily married for 6 years, he fired me on the spot. FML

#16793164
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51894) - you deserved it (3659)

On 06/22/2011 at 1:35am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, my neighbour's boiler broke and flooded his home. To solve the problem, the water company shut off the neighbourhood's water supply while they fixed his boiler. I am now unable to shower, and I smell like a zoo animal. FML

#17107286
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23716) - you deserved it (3659)

On 07/14/2011 at 12:24pm - misc - by failure (woman) - Russian Federation (Saint Petersburg City)

Today, I realized my acne is so bad that the Facebook face recognition could recognize all of my friends in a group photo except me. FML

#20516014
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28791) - you deserved it (3659)

On 02/21/2013 at 8:04am - misc - by SadFace (man) - Singapore

Today, I went on a blind date that my friend set up for me. It was going pretty good, then he said he was going to go out to smoke. 10 minutes went by and he still hadn't come back. I called my friend and she said he doesn't smoke. FML

#20566826
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37092) - you deserved it (3659)

On 03/30/2013 at 11:29am - misc - by My Life Is Just PERFECT - United States

Today, I finally decided to stand up for myself and quit my crappy job working for my abusive father. I gave him a few insults too, to which he reacted by calling the police and claiming I'd threatened to murder him. I spent three hours in jail before they finally let me go. FML

#20916390
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41985) - you deserved it (3659)

On 10/11/2013 at 12:43pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I went to the bar to celebrate my friend's birthday party. I gave the bouncer my ID and he kicked me out, saying that I should at least use an ID card with the correct gender. I'm 22 and female, he thought I was an underage boy. FML

#5497361
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37676) - you deserved it (3658)

On 09/27/2009 at 12:10am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, it was a pretty nice day so I decided I would take a walk through the park to get to work instead of driving. Healthier and better for the planet, right? Wrong. Some little bratty kids were bored apparently and decided to hide behind trees and peg me with water balloons. FML

#4074365
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36774) - you deserved it (3658)

On 07/27/2009 at 4:35am - misc - by waterballoons (man) - United States (California)

Today, my dad and I were watching Hawaii play the Navy in football. I cheered when Hawaii won. My dad turns to me and says, "You know your mother and I concieved you there?" Thanks Dad. FML

#6507580
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19992) - you deserved it (3658)

On 11/29/2009 at 2:09am - intimacy - by hawaiianlovechild - United States

Today, while working as a cashier at McDonald's, a man came in telling me that he had not received his hamburger. I looked at his receipt and the date said 11/17/09. FML

#16970431
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34742) - you deserved it (3658)

On 07/04/2011 at 5:42am - work - by crudofalife - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mom was convinced that the lawn gnomes we bought from Wal-Mart were secretly conspiring to kill us. FML

#17487537
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31296) - you deserved it (3658)

On 08/16/2011 at 2:52am - misc - by Stevie - Canada (Ontario)

Today, when I locked my newly repaired bike up, I carefully took the new rear light off it so that nobody could steal said light. Somebody stole my bike. At least I have a red light to play with. FML

#20936443
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38359) - you deserved it (3658)

On 10/28/2013 at 2:31am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicester)

Today, the guy I've had a crush on came over to my house. My Dad came in to see how we we're doing, looks at me and says "Man... You've REALLY been puttin' on the pounds!", pokes me in the stomach a few times, and leaves. FML

#6968150
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29546) - you deserved it (3657)

On 12/27/2009 at 2:15am - misc - by Fatty (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, after not receiving my paycheck for over a month, I confronted my boss about it. His response? "You still work here?" FML

#17023007
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36956) - you deserved it (3657)

On 07/08/2011 at 1:10am - work - by outofajob - United States



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