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Today, my mom came into my room, yelling at me about a pregnancy test that she found in my bathroom. My mom wouldn't believe me when I said it wasn't mine. Turns out my sister bought the test, threw it under my bathroom cabinet, and now she won't admit to the prank. She thinks this is hilarious. FML

#21078463
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43696) - you deserved it (3382)

On 03/05/2014 at 12:43am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I learned that while anybody can call me a bitch, my husband got mad at his aunt for calling our dog a mutt. FML

#6914800
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25818) - you deserved it (3380)

On 12/24/2009 at 1:02am - love - by stupid_world (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having phone sex when he stopped responding. Five minutes later and ready to hang up, he apologized because he got distracted with his game of Tetris. FML

#8973214
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19449) - you deserved it (3380)

On 03/10/2010 at 3:29pm - intimacy - by Jamie - United States (Florida)

Today, one of my usually unpleasant managers offered me a slice of cheese cake for doing a good job. I declined, but after some pestering on his part I finally accepted it. I have been violently ill for the past 2 hours. FML

#14279972
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27379) - you deserved it (3380)

On 12/21/2010 at 12:43am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, at work my boss told me I have been late, under-productive, and using up a lot of sick days. He says my job is on the line. My reason for barely showing up at work: I've been on maternity leave for 6 weeks. FML

#15917081
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34217) - you deserved it (3380)

On 04/25/2011 at 7:41am - work - by Aginsafa (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boss told me to cut my long hair. After coming back to work with a clean cut hairstyle, he apparently thought I was the new guy, and said I was going to be trained by "The long-haired girly-looking idiot." FML

#20163115
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24040) - you deserved it (3380)

On 11/14/2012 at 1:10pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my crazy ex-girlfriend legally changed her last name to mine. I'm getting married in a week. FML

#20986172
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51428) - you deserved it (3380)

On 12/09/2013 at 10:10am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I went on a trip to Cleveland. After getting lunch, my brother and I started walking back to my car. Halfway there, we were jumped, threatened with a knife, and yelled at to hand over our money. The only thing my brother could do was ask our mugger, "Uh, what gender are you?" FML

#21098906
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38146) - you deserved it (3380)

On 03/28/2014 at 10:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was at the grocery store with my dad. He let out a very silent but foul abomination of a fart. The people behind us started gagging, so he turned, pointed at me and said "That was my daughter." FML

#14622916
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31705) - you deserved it (3379)

On 01/18/2011 at 3:28am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years dumped me for a chick I shared a hospital room with for 2 months. I introduced them. FML

#17965522
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34780) - you deserved it (3379)

On 10/12/2011 at 2:11am - love - by anonymous - Canada

Today, my brother broke his mountain bike, so he stole mine, and managed to break it as well. Then he made some kind of franken-bike out of parts from both, and messed that one up too. FML

#20673285
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41123) - you deserved it (3379)

On 05/19/2013 at 3:56pm - misc - by jfc, how just how (man) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, I went for an interview regarding a seasonal position I'd been offered at a grocery store. The manager showed up 45 minutes past the scheduled interview time, cheerfully greeted me, and took me back to his office, just to tell me that they don't hire seasonal help. Ever. FML

#20671268
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42123) - you deserved it (3379)

On 05/18/2013 at 4:36pm - work - by ineedayob (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my grandma has been running around the neighborhood, dressed as Bobo the Evil Clown, chasing trick-or-treaters. All I've been able to do is chase after her, and apologize to the terrified children's families. FML

#20941017
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38179) - you deserved it (3379)

On 11/01/2013 at 2:04am - misc - by bobosgonnagetyou - United States (Oregon)



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