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Today, while living in Florida, I had a conversation with my mother explaining that it might be best for me to come back home. Her response, "Don't worry, they have plenty of homeless shelters down there if you need a place to stay." Thanks Mom. FML

#20458436
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26971) - you deserved it (3267)

On 01/14/2013 at 1:51am - misc - by living_thedream (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I had to bail my brother out of jail after he punched a convenience store clerk in the face for running out of Cheetos. FML

#20867149
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38521) - you deserved it (3267)

On 09/04/2013 at 3:00am - kids - by ven980 - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I realized that my dog is a pro at pooping directly in shoes. FML

#21257810
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33710) - you deserved it (3267)

On 09/13/2014 at 11:38pm - animals - by new dog - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend asked me when my face was going to go back to normal after being swollen from having my wisdom teeth taken out last week. My face is back to normal. FML

#942012
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52118) - you deserved it (3266)

On 04/13/2009 at 12:05am - misc - by fatface (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I came home and found my desk devoid of all paper. Turned out my mom dropped by and wanted to surprise me by cleaning up my work area. She threw away over 7 months worth of irreplaceable original sketches, notes and storylines, thinking they were worthless. My job is a full-time artist. FML

#2701716
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63355) - you deserved it (3266)

On 06/07/2009 at 8:17pm - work - by Kilika (man) - United States (California)

Today, I'm going to court to give an eyewitness account of a robbery. Unfortunately, I had a wacky dream last night concerning the robbery, and no longer have any idea of what actually happened in real life. FML

#19884306
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29861) - you deserved it (3266)

On 07/03/2012 at 2:22am - misc - by Dreamer (man) - United States (California)

Today, my book bag was so heavy that it set off my car's passenger detection system in the front seat. I had to buckle in my textbooks. FML

#20068805
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23068) - you deserved it (3266)

On 09/12/2012 at 12:05pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I confronted my boss to find out why I was denied a promotion that she promised to me. Her response? "You should know by now I'm a liar. Not my fault if you believe the things I say." FML

#20680205
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35768) - you deserved it (3266)

On 05/22/2013 at 5:48pm - work - by Snurkles McGee (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boyfriend and I were wondering whose extra spare key was on the counter when we came home. Turns out it's his ex's and she returned it, while neither of us were home. We're still taking inventory to see what's missing. FML

#21272236
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32643) - you deserved it (3266)

On 10/06/2014 at 7:05pm - misc - by thenewgirl - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out my girlfriend and her best friend compare the dumps they take to common transportation. They comment about it on each others facebook page. My girlfriend's last one was apparently a 'coach bus'. FML

#7600232
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20543) - you deserved it (3265)

On 01/26/2010 at 10:14pm - health - by poops - United States

Today, I realized that the reason there is no toilet paper in the house is because both my parents are too stubborn to be the one who goes out to buy more. It's been five days. FML

#19678004
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18448) - you deserved it (3265)

On 05/25/2012 at 11:10am - misc - by whinywiper - Canada

Today, I put my ironing board away in the bathroom. After closing the door, I heard a loud noise. The board had opened up while falling over, taking up the width of the room. I can't open the door. FML

#19533059
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22726) - you deserved it (3265) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/26/2012 at 4:45pm - misc - by Magicgwen - Sent from mobile version

Today, after being forced to take my little sister trick-or-treating, we had the cops called on us twice. She thought it would be funny to tell all the people giving out candy that I'd been following her around and that she had no idea who I was, and that she was scared of me. FML



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